QDB Admin Random >0 Quotes
Paypal Donate

#967 +(364)- [X]

* [light] is away, someone told me that theres life outside of irc, i have to check it out [log:OFF] [page:OFF] [email:dj_light@blankandjones.zzn.com]

#3106 +(271)- [X]

<Maxstah> GOD what i'd do for gwen (stefani) to just kiss the tip of my cock
<Javi> you'd blow me?
<Maxstah> javi i'd swallow
<Maxstah> i'm comfortable with my hentrosexuality
<Maxstah> long as i have a coke to chase it down with

#4208 +(37)- [X]

<JacKnife> well wats a good game to play?
<bucshott> pocket pool
<bucshott> ;P
<JacKnife> i'm an expert at that game
<bucshott> see told ya it was good

#5418 +(193)- [X]

<Guilty> Now I see that your Utopia is more of a Fruitopia

#6043 +(624)- [X]

<Corndog24> the corndog got dumped tonight
<The_Freak> Don't worry Corn, you're still cousins, right?

#6229 +(664)- [X]

<aXo> What an amazing weekend I had! I ate thirteen TV dinners, jacked off sixteen times and consumed one alcoholic beverage all without moving from this chair. I'm about to watch Godfather Part 3, then eat a bag of Doritos and pass out in a pool of my own saliva.

#6717 +(257)- [X]

<WinTek> whats a good efnet server?
<Julie2> thats an oxymoron
<ToidyMan> WinTek, good and efnet don't belong in the same sentence
<F`Nar> they don't belong on the same internet

#7221 +(344)- [X]

*** mrBlond changes topic to "The QuakeFEST is....."
*** fern changes topic to "The QuakeFEST was yesterday !!"
<mrBlond> wow I must be REALLY lagged then

#7269 +(201)- [X]

(bern) i have a feeling gf's gonna call during the game
(bern) what do i do if that happens?
(bern) bit busy darling, killing a sentry gun!

#8930 +(52)- [X]

<XvRickH> is an oc3 connection like...2 T3s combined?
<Goetterdaemmerung> 3.
<Goetterdaemmerung> hence oc-"3"
<XvRickH> so could I combine like 2 DSL lines and make like...an DSL2 or something?

#10481 +(347)- [X]

<jej> i need to "find" a copy of q3a for os 9/X too.
<jej> and wolfenstein.
<Toast> I need to "find" a copy of "your mom" for "my wang"
<jej> ":("
<cj_> "hehe"

#11353 +(1017)- [X]

<guyen> holy shit i'm not going to be home this weekend, i have an online exam i have to take, but i'll be in LA
<guyen> there's a wedding going on so i won't be able to exactly just do it at my relative's house
<guyen> i'm looking for cybercafes and crap, the only thing i can find is some place called Yogi's Cyber Hut
<guyen> holy fuck i can't believe i'm depending on Yogi for my midterm grade
<xan> at least he's smarter than the average bear

#15659 +(43)- [X]

<toonz> mae-west1#sh access-lists 1
<toonz> mae-west1#oh shit
<toonz>           ^
<toonz> % Invalid input detected at '^' marker.

#22159 +(176)- [X]

<skold> i had the wierdest fucking dream
<skold> me and the gang from scooby doo were strapped to those bed things in the back of some car for a mental institute

#23260 +(165)- [X]

<waffle> just forward all the mail locally
<Docter> can I echo mage > /home/kyle/.forward
<waffle> Kyle: i think
<waffle> then just finger kyle and see if it stuck
<Kevyn> Heh.

#24745 +(209)- [X]

* Seph gives potatoe a *Super Tight And Really Super Erotic Groping Fondling Earth Shattering Sonic Boom Oh Gawd If You Stop I'll Kill You Better Than Heaven Yet Hotter Than Hell Watch Where Ya Stick Yer Hands Super Huge Oh Gawd Oh Gawd Oh Gawd Don't Ya Dare Stop Touching Me Huggeroonies And A Knees Are Shaking Earth Is Trembling My Heart Has Stop Beating Passionit Knees Shaking Lots A Goosebumps Was That The Ground Moving Passionate Wet Deep
<Seph> um....
<Seph> wrong one

#34244 +(430)- [X]

<Shiningun> the day peoples faces start looking like ^_^ in real life is tha day i buy a flamethrower

#37520 +(1365)- [X]

<@Zen> So Sean's toaster has two settings:
<@Zen> toast
<@Zen> and bagel.
<@Zen> But it's not a switch/
<@Zen> It's a dial.
<@Zen> So I guess if your bread is 60% bagel
<@Zen> this toaster can handle it.

#40924 +(193)- [X]

<TeichDragon> batir, host a Pr0n site ;)
<batir> hrm... My digital camera is teh sux0r
<Gilthas> Not pr0n of YOU.
<Gilthas> Ew.
<TeichDragon> *shudders*

#44985 +(1033)- [X]

<LieparDestin> i challenged god to a duel once
<LieparDestin> the next day my rabbit died
<LieparDestin> i guess i lost :(

#46913 +(651)- [X]

<CaptainCanada231> So wait, I should grow the goatse?
<CaptainCanada231> *goatee

#47069 +(104)- [X]

<milenko> september was much better for my downloads
<Rudeboi> i've been too busy these last few months so mine has been down a bit
<milenko> hahaha you dont dl coz you are busy. i dont dl coz ive got all the lesbian porn on kazaa

#51915 +(1137)- [X]

<MerryXmouse> My mum and dad were just yelling at each other and I walked up and said "Can you two stop being wankers?" and my mum hit me on the head and goes "I'll wank you!...... No I won't..."

#52282 +(294)- [X]

<@CoMPLeX[a]> im booting man
<@CoMPLeX[a]> nite nite
<@Vedran> now im gonna b bored
<@CoMPLeX[a]> nah
<@CoMPLeX[a]> just keep pasting quotes
<@Inf3kTeZ> lol
<@CoMPLeX[a]> ill set a timer to say ROFL every 5 mins

#58997 +(638)- [X]

<Peter> My brother got a $1500 car deck for $6.58 today.
<kaliyama> Was that the cost of the crowbar and ski mask?

#61023 +(834)- [X]

<Waynebo> Today was haiku day in English class!
<Waynebo> My haiku was Guy in front of me/ Does not know he is asian/ Karate chop him
<Waynebo> The guy in front of me's haiku was Guy behind of me / Wants to karate chop me/ I am very scared

#62540 +(298)- [X]

<totalreality> Dail-up has its Pros
<syphonic> Like..?
<totalreality> like when your girlfriend finds out that you slept with another girl so she trys to call your house to find out whats going on or give you shit
<R^J> couldent she just knock on the front door?
<totalreality> Shit! Brb
* totalreality is away: locking the doors

#71897 +(329)- [X]

* iMac therefore iSuck *

#75184 +(129)- [X]

<Andypoo> http://antarctica.starbiz.com.au/
<Andypoo> How much does it cost to go to Antarctica anyway? :)
<nukie> its all downhill, so it wouldn't cost much
<nukie> only costs lots to come back, cause thats uphill

#81154 +(67)- [X]

bradladuk: How wierd, people now think a .plan file is a day to day diary. What an odd world this is becoming.

#98382 +(76)- [X]

<H> damn... i can think of that to hide pr0n but i can't remember mother's day... must work on priorities

#98388 +(408)- [X]

<cat_gurrrl> I'm not a common street hooker! I am a self employed roadside massage therapist!

#100374 +(185)- [X]

<  ILjWerk> I'm on terror alert level fuscia

#105295 +(108)- [X]

<DigitalChaos> ifi eightball shows up, tell him i'm lookin for him :p
* Quits: DigitalChaos
<acid88> do i look like aol instant messenger to you?

#107339 +(5)- [X]

(Kixx^) Where can I download internet ?
(@Osc) Kixx^ goto http://www.irchelp.org/download for info on getting files of any kind via IRC.
Kixx^) *lol*

#167844 +(1051)- [X]

<ZS> Ouranophobia- Fear of heaven.
<Kevyn> What's scary about heaven?
<Phantomlord> dude, christians hang out there.

#189167 +(262)- [X]

<slayer4si> hey does anyone have a good version of Hackers?
<slayer4si> or can get one?
<zMonk> no, but I could mail a pointy stick you could use to poke one of your eyes out, if that helps

#198076 +(1059)- [X]

SomethingTrifty: I'm vegetarian for a different reason
SomethingTrifty: It's not because I like animals
SomethingTrifty: i just fucking hate plants

#308143 +(353)- [X]

Retrace: so what is she?
Retrace: a .073 or a 10.0000000001
cryptic: shes like an 8
Retrace: whoa
Retrace: wait....a internet 8 or a real world 8?

#328890 +(359)- [X]

<orevo> Hmm...How about Alamo State Bank?
<Alex> ...
<Alex> Why should I trust them with my money if they couldn't even hold the fort?!

#405498 +(1094)- [X]

<Nefesis> I did stop smoking weed
<Nefesis> I need my brain 24/24

#419746 +(25)- [X]

<worstazn> yo i need to find a new bitch..
<mejmanyme> k i have a plan
<mejmanyme> you running windows or linux?
<worstazn> winxp....
<mejmanyme> k, hit start and then "run"
<mejmanyme> type in "cmd"
<mejmanyme> after commandprompt opens
<mejmanyme> type currentbitch /release
<mejmanyme> then currentbitch /renew
<mejmanyme> now type currentbitch /all and send the results

#492775 +(7110)- [X]

Egger: Heres the history of our medicine.
       "I have a sore throat."
       2000 BC : "eat this root"
       1200 AD : "That root is heathen, say this prayer."
       1500 AD : "That prayer is superstition, drink this elixir."
       1800 AD : "That elixir is snake oil, Take this pill."
       1900 AD : "That pill is ineffective, Take this antibiotic."
       2000 AD : "That antibiotic is artificial, Here why dont you eat this root."

#598463 +(1548)- [X]

<WorldEdit> do you think the word emo would be accepted in scrabble
<Sevivrus> Of course not. Emos are never accepted anywhere.

#672549 +(644)- [X]

<MLu> how clever of me
<MLu> to go out drinking today
<MLu> i work tomorrow
<MLu> how's that for a drunken haiku

#678662 +(312)- [X]

Metl_AtWork: "Whatever comes out of the resolution must address the root cause," Bush said
Metl_AtWork: I love bush quotes.
Metl_AtWork: he makes me feel smart when I read them.
Metl_AtWork: hes like the John Madden of politics =D

#757657 +(973)- [X]

<recursive>  If being an idiot was illegal, it would probably be easier to keep the criminals outside the jails and use them as fortresses.

#773988 +(756)- [X]

sup lyndz: "That's what you tell your parents if they catch you masturbating. I WASN'T MASTURBATING. I WAS CLEANING IT AND IT WENT OFF."

#874987 +(1445)- [X]

<imp0rt> guys i got some new spanish neighbours anyone know some spanish?
<niiiiike> im fluent :D
<imp0rt> K can you help me say
<imp0rt> I would like to welcome you to our neighbourhood
<imp0rt> sounds cheesy i know but they got some hot daughter :P
<niiiiike> erm..
<niiiiike> Me gustaria chupar los senos de su hija
<imp0rt> You sreious?
<niiiiike> Yeh, got it off translater tho XD
<imp0rt> K ty :)
<imp0rt> brb daughter flirting time ;)
*** Imp0rt has Quit IRC (QUIT: getting spanish pussy)
<|t34b4gg1n|> That isn't right is it?
<niiiiike> Course not XD it means i wanna suck on you daughters tits ahahahha
<|t34b4gg1n|> You, sir are evil XD
about 10 minutes later
*** Imp0rt has joined #Rand
<imp0rt> Fuck you nike fuckin tellin me bullshit
<niiiiike> WHAT?!?! Man you must have pronouned something wrong
<niiiiike> cos like
<niiiiike> if you say "sen" "os" it means somethin like rubbish
<niiiiike> so you would've insulted their house
<niiiiike> its pronouned
<niiiiike> "sien" "yos"
<imp0rt> oh, i didn't know :\
<imp0rt> ima go tell em again, hopefully they'll understand
*** Imp0rt has Quit IRC (QUIT: 2nd time)
<|t34b4gg1n|> i almosts feel sorry for him
<niiiiike> not me.

#876463 +(1461)- [X]

<@vorien> Finally fixed the bot to do real-time language translation, check it out.
<@vorien> lum, translate to spanish I am unable to accept a position at this time with your company. Thank you for your interest but I am an english speaking individual.
<@lum> vorien: :(
<@vorien> damn
<@vorien> lum, translate to spanish I am unable to accept a position at this time with your company.
<@lum> vorien: :(
<@vorien> wtf
<@vorien> lum, translate to spanish I like donkeys for sexual purposes.
<@lum> vorien: Tengo gusto de los burros para los propůsitos sexuales.
<@vorien> Naturally.

0.0440 21024 quotes approved
Hosted by Idologic: high quality reseller and dedicated hosting.
© QDB 1999-2017, All Rights Reserved.