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#43 +(5207)- [X]

<Dr_DOS> Tupac Shakur sounds like a Protoss name.

#437 +(535)- [X]

<lamont-> spanish kids can speak better english than most kids on aol
<lamont-> when they're fucking three years old!

#2904 +(717)- [X]

<Berzerker> they gave christopher reaves a standing ovation
<Berzerker> and like
<Berzerker> he cant even stand up
<Berzerker> so hes like
<Berzerker> wtf

#3532 +(52)- [X]

<blazemore> indian, asian.. same difference, they both end with "ian"

#3578 +(588)- [X]

<myzery> MIAMI -- An 81-year-old woman who arrived in court Thursday in a wheelchair plotted to smuggle 9,931 doses of Ecstasy in her luggage on a flight from London, authorities said.
<matts> hahah
<[prefix]> haha
<matts> What a doofus
<skycriesx> whered u read that
<myzery> the onion

#3935 +(2117)- [X]

*** Signoff: Morpheus (Connection reset by peer)
*** Morpheus (vanford@host-209-214-188-107.clt.bellsouth.net) has joined channel #relax
<Morpheus> argh.. that wasn't my speaker cable

#4253 +(269)- [X]

<FarginBoard> I tried to get AIDS once, but even those people wouldn't do it with me

#4287 +(973)- [X]

<memo> > Would you like to go fuck yourself? (Y/N)
<Foxie> Y
<Foxie> Y
<Foxie> ITS NOT WORKIGN

#5987 +(179)- [X]

<Foggie> i wish i could buy shares in hot women
<Foggie> then i could go to ashley judd and be like "you gotta sleep with me since i own 2% of you"

#6019 +(405)- [X]

<kubba> it's ok to blow a deadline inventing a time machine, because you can
        always go back and invent it on budget

#6563 +(21)- [X]

<copernicu> Though it is the fourth largest city in the country, Houston's television market ranks 11th.
<WonkoSane> how does a tv market rank 11th if they're 4th in population?
<CubsWoo> Remember Houston is close to Mexico

#7118 +(68)- [X]

<HowLeTT> if my back seat smells like pussy tomorrow, im going to be furious
<HowLeTT> seriously

#7815 +(570)- [X]

<Worm|PHP> I downloaded a ton of albums .. all encoded in 128 ... later I will reencode to 192
<Worm|PHP> bunch of AC/DC albums :)
<clue1ess> reencode? :P
<Worm|PHP> decode then encode again at 192
<clue1ess> will the quality really improve?
<Worm|PHP> yes it does
<CDBuRnOuT> If anything, you lose quality.
<Worm|PHP> I have done it before many times
<Worm|PHP> I can send samples if you want
<Worm|PHP> I have the same song at 128 .. decoded it .. then encoded it at 192 ... there is a big difference
<CDBuRnOuT> You're attempting to defeat the basis of the format you're encoding in by trusting your ears. Lower bitrates sacrifice pitches, etc. to lower the mp3's size, decoding and reencoding will not get those sacrificed items back.
<CDBuRnOuT> lots of people cannot tell the difference between 128/160/192, etc.
<Worm|PHP> you can with this ... just check it then see
<Worm|PHP> by what you say there shouldn't be a difference .. and if there is .. then it would sound worse
<Worm|PHP> oh well .. sounds a 100% sharper and clearer .. the 128 sounds so muffled ... back to designing

#7979 +(566)- [X]

<VOLVORacr> hello
<VOLVORacr> why are so many pepole here but nobody is chatting
<sc1> i'm masturbating
<sc1> leave me alone

#8083 +(258)- [X]

<DilleMMa> im off to maccas now
<DilleMMa> any requests?:)
<Nelyx> some motivation with a side order of dignity
<DilleMMa> and a large compassion
<Nelyx> and no, i would not like fries with that
<DilleMMa> i should get myself a "medium why do i even bother"
<DilleMMa> toodles
<Nelyx> they stopped serving those last year

#12606 +(238)- [X]

(Kawmun_Sentz): Tip of the day: Your daily fudgesicles intake should be less than 7

#14833 +(520)- [X]

--> guest (~SportsCar@166.111.6.93) has joined #lgl
* guest У
<khalek> you seem to be a little mixed up
<khalek> this is not #perl

#16174 +(38)- [X]

<munk> how the fuck cant u get in without a bnc?
<Statto> it auto bans aol
<Statto> which is racist
<munk> hahaha

#16177 +(134)- [X]

<Fishmonkey> its called "You're a Fucking Geek" dating service
* Fishmonkey was kicked by Cyber_Akuma (You have been kicked by the STFU op insult detector)

#22301 +(573)- [X]

<maddox> You know what I hate?  Programs that pretend like they're sentient beings.  Ftp daemons are the worst.. you type "bye" and it responds: "221 bye bye".. or your login fails and you execute a command, it says "log in first, then I might let you do that."  Yeah?  Well echo "fuck you" > /usr/bin/ftp
<professor> hahaha.
<maddox> "bzip2: I won't write compressed data to a terminal."
<maddox> no, "you" won't write anything because you can't.  You're a piece of shit binary written by a lonely programmer who has seen 2001 too many fucking times.

#24911 +(439)- [X]

<D4NG3R0U5> people with names describing themselves are lame
<hotgirl4u> uhh
<D4NG3R0U5> ...nm

#34675 +(300)- [X]

<gh5046> Mokey: How big are your boobs?
<Mokey> 38 aa
<gh5046> yo baby, you're shaped like an overweight 13 year-old
<Mokey> yep
<Mokey> that's me.
<gh5046> that so made me seem like an asshole

#35524 +(126)- [X]

<ToddBored> FF11 is gonna suck, its gonna be MMORPG but on PS2
<ToddBored> will kill the whole fantasy part of the series, cuz there will be idiots in it
<ToddBored> naming themselves kewldude, and kingpimpmaster
<ToddBored> i dunno why they did it...
<ToddBored> im serious dude
<ToddBored> its not gonna have a story line to get into
<ToddBored> cuz all youre gonna hear is Lololo!!L!11 j000 got owned
<ToddBored> i roxx at FF11

#38697 +(262)- [X]

<GenLeo> I had sex in 5th grade, 6th grade, 8th grade, and sophomore year
<GenLeo> er, sex ed even

#38740 +(615)- [X]

<Daffman> just hold ctrl b4 you start copying and it will take the color codes too
<dannthr> wheres the b4 button
<Daffman> [dannthr] right next to the any key

#39845 +(371)- [X]

<torm_> fuckin gay school tommorow
<Avram`> There is school for that?
<torm_> heh
<Al-Qadim> torm_'s about to graduate magna cum loudly with a BS in catching
<Avram`> Does that allow you to get more gay sex or something?
<torm_> hah
<Al-Qadim> well once he has his degree he can go on to more advanced classes like gerbiling and feltching
<torm_> aw come on now
<Avram`> I think you've cummed on enough.

#47060 +(422)- [X]

<@PhatBob> try smoking bud with pubic hairs in it, now that shit fucks you up
<@neotek> if you're smoking your pubic hairs, i'm PRETTY SURE you're already fucked up.

#48747 +(612)- [X]

<@PuffinFreshWog> kingmax is good ram
<@PuffinFreshWog> right?
<@PuffinFreshWog> but won't that not matter since my current ram is a crap brand
<@cbf> ueaj
<@cbf> uyeaj
<@cbf> yueah
<@cbf> yeah
<@cbf> fod dammit
<@cbf> fgod
<@cbf> gofd
<@PuffinFreshWog> LMFAO
<@cbf> gof
<@cbf> god

#53382 +(34)- [X]

<nuance> er s/./,
<cherub> don't forget to s/0,5/0.5/!
<nuance> regexp nazi
<cherub> s/nazi/victim/

#62365 +(332)- [X]

<Rabbitoh> hehe 2 years ago I went to Fox Studios in Sydney where they held the annual 'sexpo' and there was a chick demonstrating a way in which to make a caste of ones genitals using a fast drying seaweed based liquid to the groin. she was on stage standing like a bow legged cowboy, slapping the stuff on her axe mark beneath her skirt. mmm classy. she then said it'd be great for guys to carry the replica pussy in their pockets to play with.. yeahh.. ok lol
<punkrockgirl> you know what else is classy? using the phrase "axe mark"

#62407 +(477)- [X]

<kuribo> cacti: got any porn haiku?
<CactusJac> Ejaculation
<CactusJac> Spray your load onto my face
<MikeSweetser> It's what's for dinner.

#62622 +(823)- [X]

<KBC> "Welcome to America. You can easily find someone to shoot you to put you out of your misery by screaming NIGGER anywhere if you're white"
<Goonigoogoo > and if you're black?
<KBC> scream out "I'M BLACK!" and some police will shoot you

#62682 +(140)- [X]

beachbub hi
beachbub does anyone know if u can turn any image into a html code?
BoB_JonEz no u cant
BoB_JonEz well you could i suppose
BoB_JonEz if you made a table of 1x1 cells and set each colour individually
beachbub lol i have no idea wot dat means but thanx anyway
beachbub thanx 4 da help bye

#72122 +(1311)- [X]

<StreaK> fuck im in a lot of channels
* Volt|Sleep does a whois a StreaK
<Volt|Sleep> StreaK is on #3drealms @#incest_r_us @#animalphilia @#fecalphilia @#luvn_lambs_rule @#mom-fuck-movies #disney_pics
<StreaK> WTF
<StreaK> i thought i had ops in disney_pics

#76416 +(99)- [X]

[opti-alex] is there a tutorial somewhere that walks you through step by step on making a php site?!
[N{t}|slider] www.php.net
[opti-alex] i found nothing there

#105310 +(172)- [X]

<Ciserock> anyways, im flooding your channel cuz your gay and mReD's gay
<Sinistarr> Oh no, a flood of one line every 5 seconds! Whatever will my 300bps connection do!?

#111330 +(757)- [X]

/* After a long long idle pause */
<c4_faker> ...silence is a form of consent...
<zeedo> so you can rape a mute woman legally?
<zeedo> nice
<c4_faker> hahahhahaa
<c4_faker> whats she gunna do...scream in sign language?
<c4_faker> :P
<zeedo> yeh, they call it "punching"

#118563 +(120)- [X]

<@herugachan> Abstract art is semi-intellectual masterbation.

#120398 +(789)- [X]

<seg> I just spent 10 minutes checking my keyboard connections only to find that i had been typing my root password in an irc channel instead of the ssh window.

#121804 +(611)- [X]

<Link> I'm going to make a PC Case, with a built in fridge.
<Link> never will I be without a cold drink or snack again :D
<pookie> put an athlon in there too
<pookie> and you won't need a microwave either

#128544 +(1075)- [X]

<xanesly> my husband and I felt stupid standing in the yard with dog saying "go potty! time to go potty!" in that dorky voice you use to talk to dogs and babies
<xanesly> (and some foreigners)
<xanesly> so we decided to use STDOUT instead
<fwoom> rofl
<xanesly> so we stand outside chirping "standardout! standardout!"
<xanesly> which has made it that whenever *we* need to go to the bathroom we refer to it as STDOUT
<xanesly> and when the dog has an accident, STDERR
<xanesly> sometimes I make myself sad.

#143725 +(263)- [X]

<CptPlanet> ever get the urge to have someone videotape you masturbating in public so you can watch it later and laugh? or masturbate again.
<slick> i have a tripod

#171456 +(29)- [X]

<@chupa> i get my cable on the 19th which is gay
<@chupa> i don't know what i'm gonna do
<@chupa> what to d/l first
<@[TrIpLe]> movies
<@[TrIpLe]> porn movies
<@[TrIpLe]> full length porn movies

#212641 +(524)- [X]

<@GM`> My god damn script is disobeying me.
<@GM`> It's like I programmed a woman >:(

#714239 +(440)- [X]

<@Vlad_The1Inhaler> fuck
<@Vlad_The1Inhaler> my cat died
<@Surtsey> LOL
<@Vlad_The1Inhaler> ...
-!- Vlad_The1Inhaler [~joel@c-24-91-210-223.hsd1.ma.comcast.net] has left #sebo
<@Surtsey> oops

#750058 +(147)- [X]

<Rjx> How to get laid? Uninstall Linux.
<Rjx> case closed

#808682 +(833)- [X]

<%makat> Marcel Marceau dead.
<%makat> After all those years miming it, he's now genuinely trapped in a small box.

#810226 +(1084)- [X]

<xxx> I think I'm having some problems with my sexlife...
<phunqe> oh? :/
<xxx> Yeah, yesterday my girlfriend and I wanted to have sex, but I had a... hmm.. well you know.. problem..
<phunqe> Ah, no ping reply?

#948269 +(415)- [X]

<jeemer> you know, come to think of it i already have a 5 gallon aquarium
<jeemer> hundreds of billions of pets
<jeemer> i feed them malt and they shit out alcohol
<jeemer> its a pretty good system actually

#954197 +(466)- [X]

<DJMonty> Shit
<DJMonty> Just fell over holding my guitar, and accidentally played every song One Direction have ever written

0.0673 21032 quotes approved; 27 quotes pending
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