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#1760 +(163)- [X]

*** Parts: MadHatter (Hatter@ha.kz)
*** Joins: MadHatter (Hatter@ha.kz)
<MadHatter> wtf
<MadHatter> who kicked me
<Lepper> heh, you're too anal about being kicked
<MadHatter> I just want to know
<scar`> [16:57] *** Parts: MadHatter (Hatter@ha.kz)
<MadHatter> yeah ok
<Lepper> don't clients tell you when youg et kicked?
<Lepper> err, who kicks you
<MadHatter> I dunno man, I'm busy here
<MadHatter> leave me alone

#2067 +(618)- [X]

<tobes> Have fun at work? ;)
<Morbii> not particularly ;)
<Morbii> been back home a few hours tho
<Morbii> anything related to the word "work" isn't fun generally :P
<Morbii> pornstars may see things differently, but I wouldn't know
<Morbii> heh!
<tobes> Actually, that would probably get to be a pain in the ass.

#2829 +(407)- [X]

<DMC[isje]> i cant even count the number of times i have jerked off while talking to you guys

#3888 +(288)- [X]

<nitrifik_> wtf? that's blazemore? he looks 12!
<P2E> maybe that's why he has so much porn

#4021 +(795)- [X]

<Dark_un> man this shit is fucked
<Synoptica> whats that?
* Dark_un produces a piece of shit with a particularly suspicious looking hole

#4734 +(34)- [X]

<BurntAsh> you know what was funny
<BurntAsh> when aalyiah died
<BurntAsh> man i hated that bitch
<BurntAsh> she wont be dusting herself off and trying again anytime soon

#5089 +(844)- [X]

<langdon> i mean
<langdon> fuck on
<langdon> fuck over here and help me

#6206 +(405)- [X]

<kadafi:#916> -----------------------------
<kadafi:#916> Welcome to ftp.idsoftware.com
<kadafi:#916> -----------------------------
<kadafi:#916> Connection from logged
<kadafi:#916> You are user 201 of 200 available connections.
<kadafi:#916> IM USER 201 BEYOTCH

#7540 +(260)- [X]

< Kayne > man, i should take this vibrating monkey out of my ass... it's starting to affect my typing

#8863 +(150)- [X]

<Bikky> I've been staring at fserves so long I don't know whether I need a shit or a haircut

#8902 +(291)- [X]

<DL|horses> Death to all who oppose me!
* Warlord dies

#8965 +(468)- [X]

*** gamingsloop0r is now known as sloop
<@sloop> parents
<@sloop> fs
<@sloop> when u leave home remember this important lesson
<@sloop> on a sunday
<@sloop> when ur not doing anything
<@sloop> phone them
<@sloop> or
<@sloop> they will phone u when ur busy
<@sloop> and expect a 1 hr conversation
<@ronindm> well it is fathers' day
<@sloop> oh shit
<@sloop> brb making a call

#9359 +(115)- [X]

<stank> but copying data to a floppy disk and back makes it lose integrity! like dubbing a tape!

#9575 +(298)- [X]

<Parc[Cleaning]> I'm starting to worry about my memory :-(
<Parc[Cleaning]> I was walking along, and it struck me that I had to go to the bathroom. So I went to the place, unzipped my pants, and then realized I was standing in front of the trashcan o_O

#10869 +(629)- [X]

<Stuckie> I had to sit through the Sound of Music for TWO FRIGGIN weeks.. bloody school shows... probably why I've cracked... lol
<Stuckie> The hiiiiiills are aliiiiiive with the sound of **BANG!!** DIE YOU BASTARDS!!! **BANG!!**

#12787 +(554)- [X]


#22417 +(177)- [X]

origamikitty: I feel like sisyphus trying to push the boulder of knowledge up a mountain of reps today
origamikitty: Christ al-freaking-mighty
GnaaaGnaa: i feel like that just about every day
GnaaaGnaa: except its a ball of dung
GnaaaGnaa: up a mountain of futility

#23382 +(379)- [X]

<jonathans> can you kick his ass
<Rjx> I know karate, he knows kickboxing
<Rjx> but if I punched him he'd break my network card
<jonathans> nevermind then

#27455 +(62)- [X]

<J{E}K> What is the best song of NIN?

#29666 +(720)- [X]

<eX|NYC> wtf my mom tells this lady to come over then she leaves 10 secs b4 she comes so im stuck here with this lady like uhh dude i dont know wtf she went leave me alone let me play my computer games >_<
<PJ> its called a baby sitter.

#34274 +(284)- [X]

* Now talking in #9-11
<[9-11]|vS|darkwinter> cant we just have a moment of silence?
<[9-11]GodLovesFiremen> WE WILL HAVE GAMES
<[9-11]GodLovesFiremen> LIKE
<[9-11]ILLuSiOnZ|GaS|> we did b4
<[ws]-storm[9-11]> hi
<Will> holy shui
<[9-11]GodLovesFiremen> PIN THE JET ON THE WTC TOWER
<Will> no one is oped either
<[9-11]GodLovesFiremen> KABOOM
<nLs|rOnny[9-11]> omfg
* *** G-line requested by Jaden.. (465)
* Disconnected

#36543 +(353)- [X]

<Thermo-nC-> Why do newbies use X in thier names ?
<-=X=-> I'm nota n00b you fucking mofo fucker!
<Thermo-nC-> I rest my case ;E

#38755 +(175)- [X]

Ibor132: what network u on?
engel of nien: my asshole
Ibor132: efnet then?

#40556 +(593)- [X]

<DeathscytheFish> I think the reason i'm not good with girls stems from the fact that the first time I ever called a girl was also the day that the girl's mom was killed in a car wreck and i'm trying to pick her up without knowing this and she proceeds to rip me a new one
<Kevyn> You didn't say "I'll let you call me mommy" to her, did you?
<Brandon64> Fish, you should have broke the ice with a "Yo mama is so fat..." joke
<Amber> Yo mama is so dead...
<Kevyn> "My mom died" "Haha yeah, that's the oldest one in the book"
<Brandon64> "Knock knock"  "Who's there"  "Your mom"  "Your mom who?"  ...silence...then 5 minutes later, "Get it?  She's dead! HAHAHAHA, let's go bowling!"

#51057 +(961)- [X]

Geo: You know, I would be a straight A college student if it weren't the the internet.
Chronologist: for the internet, you mean.
Geo: ..
Geo: SEE?!
Geo: ...
Hidoshi: ...Converse.
Hidoshi: Conversate isn't a word.
Geo: ...
Geo: Fuck.

#53353 +(390)- [X]

<NightO> Jesus is coming, everyone, look busy!!
--- solicit sets ban on jesus!*@*

#54237 +(90)- [X]

<Soul`is`away> I was ashamed of the latest KMart catalogue
<Soul`is`away> Flipped to the games bit...
<Soul`is`away> Xbox and PS2, but no cube AT ALL
<risq> there are no gamecubes in ANY catalogues
<Soul`is`away> WHY NOT!>
<Onikage> maybe after they put in the xbox, there was no room for the cube

#55924 +(589)- [X]

* Cassa gets naked and covers herself in blood from her missing fingernail
<utopian> "It looks like you're writing a letter"
<@DumHed> ok utop that is officially the funniest thing you've ever said

#58239 +(597)- [X]

<fluffy> note to self. when scanning a portion of your anatomy. remember the scanning software keeps that preivew image. untill your parents go to use it.

#58610 +(131)- [X]

<rover> I took my Ventolin puffer, and puffed it onto this cockroach that was still
<rover> it died

#59880 +(15)- [X]

<fetman> when I read the quotes on bash.org I feel that I too wan't to be as stupid as they are and make such stupid comments and make everyone laugh
<fetman> How do I become as stupid as they are?
<tfg> There are two steps, as follows:
<tfg> 1) Bang your head repeatedly on the wall until you pass out
<tfg> 2) Repeat step 1 until you get that stupid idea that you can actually be funny out of your head

#61798 +(733)- [X]

*** f0r-1- has joined #photoshop
<f0r-1-> hi
<djahmar> hi
<f0r-1-> How it hanging?
<f0r-1-> :D
<Anapaest> from here to iowa
<f0r-1-> WHEEE! so, where are you from?
<Anapaest> iowa :(

#79952 +(178)- [X]

<Tom-Servo> I pity this girl i'm talking to

#85537 +(192)- [X]

<toe-sleep> i tell you what. if i had my way...
<toe-sleep> i'd be the one writing the propoganda leaflets america drops on baghdad
<toe-sleep> say shit like
<toe-sleep> "say no to saddam and in 6 months you're eating big macs!"
<fysh> get the mc'kebab buy one get one free mondays only
<toe-sleep> "resistance is futile. opertion desert mcdonalds franchise will succeed"
<toe-sleep> "would you like some freedom fries with that?"
<toe-sleep> (a corporation of SONY)

#106500 +(328)- [X]

<Nicoli_t> Urgh... i feel like such a geek...
<Nicoli_t> so I was in buffalo new york right, and theres this big like gothic building...
<Nicoli_t> all these little ledges and shit...
<Nicoli_t> So I looked at it... and said to myself "you know what... that would be a kickass sniping tower in unreal...
<Nicoli_t> i could like, climb that with the translocater easily..."
<logical_or> lol, geek
<Nicoli_t> thats okay, my friend started identifying what the radio towers on top of it did, he works at radio shack.
<logical_or> ROFL

#111642 +(597)- [X]

Tim Cline: im to lazy
Azu: so lazy that you can't but the second 'o' in too
Tim Cline: indee

#125442 +(382)- [X]

<@Gesten> I'm going to cry when my grandchildren look at me and say: "Grandpa...why'd you let them make everything on the internet illegal?"
<@Amily> as if it was all your doing? :)
<@Gesten> I should've been born two years earlier so I could ahve ahd a voice.
<@Amily> you don't have a voice?!?!
<@Amily> you're a mute!
<@Gesten> You didn't know I was a mute?
<@Amily> well i know now, and it makes me immensely happy
<@Gesten> No seriously...my neck hit a countertop when I was a kid. I can only make high-pitched muffled noises that sound like squirrels mating.

#138198 +(525)- [X]

<@sed> somebody tell me what i'm forgetting to save before i reinstall windows
<+nimper> porn
<@Jagfire> sed, porn
<+Sabby> porn

#148790 +(717)- [X]

<@grim^> one time
<@grim^> I had my dick in this girl
<@grim^> and it was nice
<@jonoblows> and then the doctor pulled you all the way out, right?

#166386 +(1048)- [X]

<@FirebirdGM> I just called my Futureshop and asked them how much a 20 GB Hard drive weighed when it was full with information, compared to when it was empty.
<@FirebirdGM> The guy that was on the phone told me that it was only a few pounds difference.
<@FirebirdGM> And that's why I don't shop at futureshop.
<%Physic3> I think their bullshit factor is the best though. No matter how absurd your question may be, they always give an answer.
<@Firebird> Lol, I should call again and be like 'uhh, yes. I just bought a New ACIT BIOS and my UDP Packets are being Tracert'd by my UNIX Box without my Fortran application being applied to all outgoing UDP and TCP packets. My Ping never is like that, why?!"
<@Firebird> He would probably be like 'Yes'.

#258539 +(623)- [X]

<Mighty> I'm hoping I misheard my mother; she said the daycare my brother is going to is called "Little Third Reich"

#282906 +(108)- [X]

<Kiyone> i know you live in australia and everything, but do you know who vanilla ice is?
<reaper> yes
<reaper> he used to be a jazz musician, and became a pornstar

#353125 +(610)- [X]

<Prowler> I rekon if i were a super hero i would call myself "Proctastinator" with the power to Leap tall buildings, control time, shoot fireballs out of my ass and other cool super hero stuff
<Prowler> but i'd never get around to doing any of it

#354520 +(2473)- [X]

troupe: oh shit, i just heard a car crash outside
cyateon: oh shit
cyateon: go loot the corpses before they respawn

#402026 +(2022)- [X]

<Keolah> whats up?
<Zarggg> A direction away from the center of gravity of a celestial object.

#606872 +(693)- [X]

<Jaice> I just got a gummy bear stuck in my nose!
<Divination> 100,000 sperm... and you were the fastest?

#621572 +(919)- [X]

[sp00n06] i don't get math
[vinyard] you get even?
[sp00n06] ??

#647033 +(313)- [X]

You Are Hemp: i bit my lip pretty hard today
You Are Hemp: there was blood on the opposite side
You Are Hemp: didnt get me laid though
hobopower113: does biting ones lip usually get one laid?
You Are Hemp: i guess not...

#769729 +(653)- [X]

<~Flash> how does one explain the difference between celeron and non celeron to a non tech ??
<+bomarrow1> one is for toasting bread
<+bomarrow1> the other is for processing instructions

#961099 +(360)- [X]

<Nichole> my sister is giving birth on thursday. Drug baby. Apparently CPS is going to contact me to take him.
<Azalea> Ahhhhhhhh
<keith> what kind of drugs?
<keith> a baby full of drugs could be worth something
<Nichole> heroin, Oxy, meth
<Nichole> mostly heroin
<keith> expensive baby!
<blaxthos> so... your sister will be free this weekend?
<Nichole> yep have at it
<assfetish> i got this mental image of a baby shaped pinata full of drugs being broken at some wall street party
<Nichole> she's in prison
<Nichole> she makes me feel very normal
<latras> you are very normal ;)
<keith> shes still getting heroin, oxy and meth in prison?
<blaxthos> is she imprisoned because of baby ?
<keith> yeah id say your pretty normal
<Nichole> keith: she's on methadone now
<blaxthos> i think having babies should be a crime
<keith> procreating is definitely a crime
<Nichole> she's imprisoned because she broke parole, child endangerment (from first daughter), and drug related charges, and being on the run
<Azalea> That is a shitty situation
<assfetish> are you gonna take the baby?
<Nichole> i dont know
<keith> azalea needs another kid i hear
<assfetish> i have a friend who wants a kid real bad
<blaxthos> if you are on irc and you can't figure out how to unload a kid, you're doing it wrong

0.0728 21090 quotes approved; 713 quotes pending
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