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#327 +(1309)- [X] <persia> my favorite country song is "i fucked my horse on a sunday morning"
<migg> my fave country song is "Its midnight in montana, and i cant get my dick out of this cow"
*** You were kicked by sandk1ng (i like the song "i kicked my friend for makin fun of music i listen to")
#1013 +(202)- [X] (iMike) i dont trust that britney spears has areolas that big
#1423 +(489)- [X] <katers> my fucking roommate
<katers> needs to stop being a ho
<katers> or cut me in on the action
<katers> one or the other.
#1566 +(289)- [X] <Chis_> this problem calls for a trip to #math
#1785 +(435)- [X] <Weazel> stupid cops
<Weazel> always giving me shit
<Weazel> SHE WANTED TO HAVE SEX
#2428 +(225)- [X] <Snag> *beep*beep*
<Steil> snag you set off the gaydar again didnt you???
<Snag> funny
<Snag> :|
#3259 +(353)- [X] (acidic) i love it how my g/f calls me "fucker" with so much affection.
#6185 +(173)- [X] <Arctil> cool...it works now
<Arctil> HolyFuck: did you flush your DNS cache or something?
<HolyFuck> Arctil: i disabled SlowDownTheFaggots in the httpd.conf file
#6875 +(124)- [X] <Guest11734> Hello! I can redirect all your bot op request, even BETWEEN
networks. Just type /msg Guest11734 op [botnick] [channel] [password],
and I'll fix it for you!
#7790 +(582)- [X] <zyrowan> when I have a fiance
<zyrowan> I'm going to get "Will you marry me?" tatooed on the back of my balls
<zyrowan> and talk her into a rim job
<zyrowan> it'll be soo romantic
#8093 +(325)- [X] <Hazim> APPARENTLY I CANNOT CHARGE MALE ESCORTS TO MY LIBRARY CARD
<LR|seksiwidow-> why the hell not?
<Hazim> i dunno.. they thought i wouldn't return them on time?
#10481 +(301)- [X] <jej> i need to "find" a copy of q3a for os 9/X too.
<jej> and wolfenstein.
<Toast> I need to "find" a copy of "your mom" for "my wang"
<jej> ":("
<cj_> "hehe"
#11368 +(1413)- [X] <+ChiMP> WHATS GAYER THAN ME AND STARTS WITH AN N!!?!?
<@miz> nothing
<@miz> :o
#15432 +(186)- [X] <^CHH>Stormer> brought some bitch home from the bar last night, had to leave her here this morning when I went to work, I come home and the bitch is gone and stole my damn cat
<^CHH>Stormer> that dumb bitch.....
<^CHH>Stormer> she wouldn't even swallow
#15710 +(80)- [X] <Stemish> "How many NOC staff does it take it screw in a light bulb?"
<PetrDoubt> 500 to send the outage notices to nocstaff, 14 managers to
escalate it to client services and back, and one to change it.
#16979 +(222)- [X] <mgt> i can't find any good porn anymore tho
<mgt> i like reading stories now
<mgt> it gets my imagination going
<mgt> the trick is getting yourself to actually believe they are true
<mgt> and not written by some fat horny star trek fan
#17414 +(247)- [X] <tytu> does anyone ever pull hisself?
<r0mulus> what?!
<tytu> when you pull your...you know
<r0mulus> hmm
<r0mulus> no
<r0mulus> i don't
<r0mulus> know what you mean
<tytu> you wrap your hand around your dick and then start to pull up and down
<r0mulus> umm... i think your in the wrong channel
#27462 +(31)- [X] <Woody> some guys can last longer than 5 seconds mendy :p
<Mendez> I wouldn't know - I've never had a guy give me a blowjob.
#34274 +(242)- [X] * Now talking in #9-11
<[9-11]|vS|darkwinter> cant we just have a moment of silence?
<[9-11]GodLovesFiremen> YOU ARE ALL INVITED TO MY TERROR DAY BARBECUE
<[9-11]GodLovesFiremen> WE WILL HAVE GAMES
<[9-11]GodLovesFiremen> LIKE
<[9-11]ILLuSiOnZ|GaS|> we did b4
<[ws]-storm[9-11]> hi
<Will> holy shui
<[9-11]GodLovesFiremen> PIN THE JET ON THE WTC TOWER
<Will> no one is oped either
<[9-11]GodLovesFiremen> KABOOM
<nLs|rOnny[9-11]> omfg
* *** G-line requested by Jaden.. (465)
* Disconnected
#36425 +(578)- [X] <WillaCuz> *sigh*
<WillaCuz> why do people shoot at robocop
#37315 +(741)- [X] <Requiem> wtf r u talkin bout, i droped englsh cuz it suks
<Nolan> As shown by your crappy spelling, you probably should have stayed with it.
<Requiem> fuk u, ur all gay
*** Requiem has quit IRC (FUK U NOLIN)
#37415 +(42)- [X] <melvin> figures
<melvin> I joined #geekissues on efnet (bash.org)
<melvin> it's just
<melvin> people trying to be witty
#38815 +(365)- [X] <rhraz_w3rk> recession? pshh, i haven't seen one hobo yet!
<ESD-Wyrk> that's cause you need to go outside to see one
<ESD-Wyrk> most of them aren't 'online'
#43239 +(509)- [X] *** Now talking in #c++
<ZorbaTHut> *insert clever witticism here*
<larne> *insert witty and humourosly insulting reply*
<ZorbaTHut> *insert quick knowledgeable come-back*
<larne> *insert nitpick on minor grammar issue*
<ZorbaTHut> *insert overgeneralization regarding your race/gender/profession/sexual habits*
<djSwish> *insert kickban*
<ZorbaTHut> *insert mostly unrelated comment about nazis*
#48957 +(359)- [X] <Shino> scientists are going to make a blue rose with new breakthroughs in biotechnology.. our tax dollars at work!!!
<Shino> I guess they got bored of the cancer thing......
#49147 +(329)- [X] (timmo) #33375 +(-61)- [X]
(timmo) <jestuh> What's the worse part of raping a 5yo boy?
(timmo) <jestuh> Getting blood on your clown suit
(timmo) classic jestuh quote
(timmo) how can that be -61
[pHluid] Dunno, they must've thought it was a nigger joke.
#52956 +(198)- [X] <Ddamn> watching someone get banned is like watching a retard throw eggs at an old lady
#58901 +(147)- [X] <@Shadoe> I don't want to have sex with you
<@Shadoe> EVAR
<Vladimere> yeah yeah
<Vladimere> i've heard it before
<Vladimere> that's what they all say, and then they end up staring at the headboard
<@Shadoe> yeah, going "jesus christ when will it end"
#72251 +(246)- [X] (doggie^): i cant believe you're getting a new mobile number rather than do work
(doggie^): i applaud you
(slippy): lol
(slippy): it's not worth the money
(slippy): like that chap who had the WinME machine with the virus
(slippy): two days later he called again
(doggie^): rofl
(slippy): "i opened the virus email again and i'm infected again"
(slippy): <HangUp>
#79798 +(1650)- [X] <hamoom> man, this is great, 450 hp, sleek design, sleek interior, this is going to be my new car
<mrmin123> cars have hit points?
#84825 +(31)- [X] <Hostile blinks>
<MacBinaryBot> You blink, I stink, we're pink.
<Hostile> you dink
<MacBinaryBot> You kink
<Hostile> youd think
<MacBinaryBot> You're gonna sink.
<Hostile> ok *wink*
<MacBinaryBot> heh
<MacBinaryBot> Time to twink.
<Hostile> silly chink
<MacBinaryBot> Long link
<Hostile> is it mink?
<MacBinaryBot> Need zinc!
<Hostile> lol you wrink
<MacBinaryBot> You're covered in ink.
<Hostile> bah thats what i was gonna use, you .... erm bink -.-
<Hostile> k i lose
<Hostile> *cry*
<MacBinaryBot> lol, finque
<Hostile> -.-
<Hostile> time for me to go shrink
#96356 +(816)- [X] <black-ice> this girl I went out with last night was pretty cute.
<black-ice> I can't believe she said 'no' for a second date.
<black-ice> We had a lot of fun, right up until I beat her at chess.
<goKev> DUDE! You took a girl out on a CHESS DATE and you're trying to figure out why you didn't get a second date?!?!
<black-ice> Good point. I probably should have let her win.
#136593 +(318)- [X] <Volt9000> oy this is lame
<Volt9000> some 3 year old "genius" kid
<Volt9000> WOW HE KNOWS THE CAPITALS OF COUNTRIES
<DopefishJustin> omfg
<Volt9000> YEAH THAT MAKES HIM A GENIUS
<DopefishJustin> autistic more likely
<Volt9000> ROFL!!!!
<DopefishJustin> or maybe just a fucking dork
<Volt9000> :D
<Roger|tehsleep> OMG WHAT'S THE CAPITAL OF MEXICO?! "vuenezuela" YOU GENIUS
<Volt9000> that autistic comment was awful :D
<Volt9000> ROFL ROGER
* Volt9000 can't breathe
<DopefishJustin> it's Mexico City, not one of the harder capitols :P
<Roger|tehsleep> i know that
<Roger|tehsleep> vuenezuela is the capital of peru, silly
<DopefishJustin> oh yeah
#147493 +(252)- [X] <-yper-orse> mamma mia
<-yper-orse> my my
<-yper-orse> i cannot resist u
<-yper-orse> mamma mia
<Squeeks> "With Dragon Voice, you too can flood IRC Channels as you sing to ABBA"
#186807 +(823)- [X] <Comatosis> wow this room is empty! we have it all to ourselves :-p
<Alain> yup, just you and me :-)
* Comatosis gets naked
<Alain> uh, my mom is sitting here next to me, i dont want her to think i chat with perverts
* Comatosis put his clothes back on
<Comatosis> sorry
#187661 +(164)- [X] <_TP_> "My name is Reginald P Linux and ever since my wife died Ive been VERY depressed"
<SanityClause> He should recompile her kernel
#199300 +(872)- [X] <marduk> why do all the 14-year old girls at my school have completely impossible crushes, like orlando bloom?
<marduk> why don't they go for someone more realistic?
<marduk> like r. kelly.
#200875 +(668)- [X] On new years eve a friend told me this:
Psychism Alchemy: ugh I think I'm on my computer to much...
Psychism Alchemy: someone just asked me what my resolution was as I answered 1600x1200...
#268768 +(1569)- [X] <ShadowFury-> whats command for new nick name
* ChoBo is now known as gaynamehere
<Whitehorn> '/nick
<gaynamehere> err shit
#308267 +(446)- [X] (Damage|rysny) whats the difference between michael jackson and acne?
(tkd-cod|enm1ty) dunno, what?
(Damage|rysny) acne waits till 13 to come on your face.
#358697 +(432)- [X] [+Mista] so how would I go about making a game?
[+DJ-Northern] 1- Hire a team of developers
[+DJ-Northern] 2- Spoof screenshots to create hype
[+DJ-Northern] 3- Buy an E3 booth
[+DJ-Northern] 4- Take your company public
[+DJ-Northern] 5- Disappear with the money before anybody asks for a product
#540900 +(695)- [X] <konefku> If you have twins, im buying you a shirt that points to your left side that says "I LOVE THIS ONE MORE."
#626932 +(1825)- [X] <mcsuede> so i was half way through drinking a dr pepper
<mcsuede> and my wife sexed me so i fell asleep
<mcsuede> and when i woke up she had drank my dr pepper
<mcsuede> it was the last one
<mcsuede> i fear it was a plot
#643852 +(322)- [X] <Warfle> So get this.
<Warfle> I'm getting my car inspected and theres this girl in line ahead of me.
<Warfle> Pushing her car.
<Warfle> "I don't think she's going to pass inspection"
#644110 +(506)- [X] (@nd): i should find a hobby
(@nd): other than drinking
(@rawby): put your beer in the freezer
(@rawby): then take up licking
#660644 +(2069)- [X] <raphael_sorel> So, where you from? ;)
<sweet_angel47> Chicago, Illinois. how bout u?
<raphael_sorel> Manila, Philippines. :D
<sweet_angel47> where is that? in like, Russia?
<raphael_sorel> No, it's in South East Asia.
<sweet_angel47> dude, i totally fail at geometry
<raphael_sorel> ...
#755026 +(1374)- [X] <Paragon> man i remember in like second grade the teaxcher asked what 2-3 was
<Paragon> and someone was like "you can't do that"
<Paragon> and she was all "right you can't
<Paragon> and i was like "nooo, NEGATIVE NUMBERS"
<Paragon> and she ignored me
<Paragon> bitch
#756661 +(371)- [X] <MrKurtz> I intend to get tattooed and/or pierced again in costa rica
<MrKurtz> in keeping with tradition
<JBlitzen\AG> What better to do in the third world then experiment with needles
#831458 +(1328)- [X] evilada: damn girls are too confusing about what they want from guys
lantern: Well they certainly know what they dont want
lantern: see now i'm tall, but not athletic, i don't have a full head of hair
lantern: so bam three strikes
evilada: girls dont work like baseball
evilada: if they did, everyone would cheer if you stole second base when no one was looking
evilada: and thats the complete opposite of what happens, trust me
#890929 +(910)- [X] <amb> let's make a coloring book
<amb> and then sue kids for unauthorized derivative works
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