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#1005 +(871)- [X]

Mtgwiz2727: what is the difference between c++ and dos?

#1962 +(58)- [X]

(dOkTeR) man, i woke up this morning, and looked at porn for 30 mins, then went to school...i was so horny for my first 2 classes, i had to jerk off in the Tier Building bathroom

#2039 +(308)- [X]

<hypr> joker is playing all his vinyl from 1998
<hypr> heh
<hypr> or somthing
<hypr> old ;P
<caspuh> hah
<caspuh> 98?
<caspuh> they had vinyal then?

#2304 +(253)- [X]

<TomGreen> hehe
<TomGreen> [17:27] <Ergot> r u really tom green?
<TomGreen> [17:27] <Ergot> cuz i am like a huuuuge fan!

#3880 +(509)- [X]

<drano> i need to go to sleep soon, i was late for school this morning
<Wyatt> being late rules.
<furandfx> periods
<furandfx> the only place being late does not rule

#3885 +(215)- [X]

<ScumDog> I don't think the act itself is sick, though. They're going to have sex with someone, it might as well be me.

#4450 +(321)- [X]

<Alien> I believe our girls' softball team had something about them never being loose or something on their shirts ... they misspelled lose with HILARIOUS RESULTS.

#6662 +(220)- [X]

<enrol> my new ircing technique is unstoppable
<jj> do you think youre dalnet sword can defeat me!?
<jj> en guard, ill let you try my efnet style

#6715 +(697)- [X]

<Tajador>  I'm a pseudomasochist, pretend to spank me

#7774 +(191)- [X]

<chaowork> dont singe the wenis
<faustwork> yeah, nude bacon cooking is tricky
<chaowork> i hear thats gonna be in the next olympics
<faustwork> you should see how i flip it over

#7940 +(189)- [X]

<videogamenerd> a real hacker not a "$kr!p7!3"
<kt> videogamenerd: your geek is showing

#8001 +(127)- [X]

<mewse> oh my fuck this is so cool
<mewse> a time-lapse movie of an aquarium of magic mushrooms growing

#9031 +(571)- [X]

<DJTodd> My sister in law once asked me if it counted as sex if she fucked some guy but didn't kiss him.
<DJTodd> She's a real brain.

#9131 +(118)- [X]

<FairLighT> we'd have to do something incredibly crazy to distract the wal-mart staff
<V3nOm> lol yeah go take a shit in the front garden

#12891 +(175)- [X]

<JallakWriting> "mammario-fetishistic" is a memorably stupid sounding phrase. How about "tit-happy"?

#13340 +(246)- [X]

<Ludwig> thats amazing, how a company can charge you extra for what you shoulda gotten originally
<Ludwig> its like buying a hamburger, getting the buns only, then having to pay more for the meat
<@Gaile[diinet]> Ludwig, you're wrong, clear and simple
<Ludwig> only thing clear and simple is getting through your panties
*** Ludwig was kicked by Gaile[diinet] (Gaile[diinet])

#13728 +(197)- [X]

<Darth-Phenom> So Sumez...how was Nadine?
<Sumez> Nice
<Sumez> She liked big cocks
<Sumez> And she did oral
<Yolkhead> Luckily you are a big cock then.

#14690 +(819)- [X]

Zedd: i fucking hate kids.
IronHelix: They won't shut up. Ever.
Zedd: Fucking annoying brats.  They serve no practical purpose other than taking up valuable resources.
IronHelix: They scream when they're happy. They scream when they're scared. They scream when you toss them in the garbage disposal. It never ends!

#15435 +(1123)- [X]

<Setups> is it a forest fire?
<Setups> I CAN SEE THE SMOKE FROM MY HOUSE
<SneakyPete> wtf going on setups? what state?
<Setups> its in alberta
<Setups> canada
<Raider|FIRE> must be forest fire
<travelyan> they have fire in canada?
<Setups> fuck you
<Setups> eh

#16369 +(764)- [X]

<esokitty> FUCKING A
<kitten> fuck a B it has more holes

#22094 +(1408)- [X]

<g0atb0t> What's ADD stand for? Attention Deficit LET'S GO RIDE BIKES!

#31233 +(473)- [X]

(ori) I just watched the movie "Malcolm X"!!
(ori) but I have a question
(ori) What happend to the other nine malcolm movies?

#37161 +(50)- [X]

<saxxonpike> The goal of war is not to die for your country, it's to make the other bastard die for his

#43113 +(617)- [X]

<Murdercules> once, i accidently walked in on my sister when she was taking a shower, and i saw her tities and her body, i was like, damn! who's that fine chick in my shower, then i saw my sister's face, and i was like, damn, i didn't know my sister was that hot

#47243 +(321)- [X]

<energizer> how should i tell her?
<flawed> just draw a little stick figure in photoshop then some barb wire then another stick figure on the other side of the wire, then put arrows pointing at each, one with "brian" and the other with "shannon"
<flawed> doesn't have to be barb wire either, it can be a dragon.. or a moat

#48975 +(266)- [X]

*** Malrothien was kicked by Malrothien (this rooms too ghey for me)
<Mardom> whoa shit
<Mardom> you can kick yourself?
<Mardom> thats deep

#49438 +(205)- [X]

<Rogue> lol @ my dads message just sent to me
<Rogue> "Press down if you think your gay"
<Rogue> i pressed down
<Rogue> "You fucking faggot"
<Rogue> he is an asshole
* Rogue slaps his dad

#49734 +(-45)- [X]

<c-rOCK> man im gonna smoke like an 8th to my dome right before food time
<c-rOCK> munchies like fuck.

#50039 +(46)- [X]

<RingLass> wow ... too much bash.org ...
<RingLass> kazaa lite has an add that says "Don't Share Unprotected" and I did a double take reading it before I realized they were talking about computers ...

#58754 +(171)- [X]

<The_Cold> I wish it was the end of January.
<Tenchi147> it is
<Tenchi147> in japan...
<Tenchi147> in japan it's the year 2025
<The_Cold> I wish it was the end of january in North America.
<Tenchi147> it is
<Tenchi147> in canada
<Tenchi147> it's like 1805 in canada

#59803 +(254)- [X]

<Hemlock> cloning one's pet doesn't seem that costly
<Hemlock> i am seriously considering doing this
<Compute> hem:  you can't clone rocks, dumbass

#68573 +(310)- [X]

<[bM]DrFunk-404-> i talked for 4 hours, to my anti-drug girlfriend
<[bM]DrFunk-404-> stoned off my ass
<[bM]DrFunk-404-> she didnt suspect nothing
<[bM]DrFunk-404-> im like "everyone here is wasted and toasted"
<[bM]DrFunk-404-> she is like You arent i hope
<[bM]DrFunk-404-> im like Nope!
<[bM]DrFunk-404-> oh man, i should be an actor
<LoZel> no you shouldnt
<[bM]DrFunk-404-> yes
<LoZel> no dude you cant even make text beleivable

#84392 +(310)- [X]

<drunkers> u arab?
<Zelbinian> Nope.
<drunkers> good
<Zelbinian> Irish, French, and English.
<drunkers> geez
<drunkers> u moms a whore

#98043 +(204)- [X]

<Murr> DrForr, presumably the tank crew *knew* how to swim, but not how to escape from a tank with open hatch that had turned on its roof before sinking.
<DrForr> The tank flipped over -then- sank? Now that's rich.
<arkuat> what is this about?  cisco is building tanks now?
<Winkola> arkuat: If they do, you can count on a lot of drowned newbie net admins.
<Winkola> "To report a drowning emergency, press 1, and hold for 27 minutes."

#105770 +(390)- [X]

<imagine> Oh god.
<imagine> I just tried to mute my fan with the tv remote.

#113110 +(328)- [X]

<AfraidOfAmericans> I have money that smells like marijuana smoke
<AfraidOfAmericans> I am annoyed.
<Popples> I like the normal smell of money.
<AfraidOfAmericans> heh.
<AfraidOfAmericans> you mean cocaine?

#113297 +(175)- [X]

<aen> I look somewhat akin to a pensive crackwhore waiting for cock suckage, vexed that it hasn't come to pass.

#199336 +(540)- [X]

<badaboom> who can help me ? i'm french and i don't know irc
<Paladine> can't help you with the being french part, you are screwed their mate

#254287 +(1586)- [X]

<jadedlphoto> Maybe the free masons control porn now.
<gz> the carnal cabal?
<firegod> the illuminaughty?

#309208 +(434)- [X]

<fetus> Hooters- "Chicken tastes better with a boner."

#398830 +(667)- [X]

<pyromaniac> reality tv is a very sketchy "reality"... one guy picxking from 25 hott chicks... oh yea THATS reality

#454183 +(1453)- [X]

spoonsucker:  I ordered pizza today (not from Pizza Hut because they're not open for lunch on Mondays or something) but the delivery driver was a 45 year old Italian-looking lady with six times too much makeup on. My dad was home on his lunch break and saw her leaving. Then he came storming into my room demanding to know if I'd just had sex with a hooker =

#454510 +(777)- [X]

< Cronos Gabliani > I personally belive that in any situation that you expect a kick in the balls, and you get a slap in the face, thats a victory.

#537145 +(999)- [X]

<sulli> So I placed my order for the computer today
<sulli> Any idea what "backorder" means?
<dy> That means they dont have it, but will ship it to you once they get it.
<sulli> FUCK that means all Im getting is 2 fans, a heatsink, and my free shirt and ballcap.
<Omnica> Well, that will allow you to Look cool, and Be Cool :)
<sulli> Fuck you

#677737 +(823)- [X]

<TheFlibble>Windows XP doesn't like admitting it's made a mistake
<TheFlibble>It doesn't give error messages it just tries to carry on regardless
<TheFlibble>Its like an embarrassed old man sitting in a pool of his own piss.

#678662 +(318)- [X]

Metl_AtWork: "Whatever comes out of the resolution must address the root cause," Bush said
Metl_AtWork: I love bush quotes.
Metl_AtWork: he makes me feel smart when I read them.
Metl_AtWork: hes like the John Madden of politics =D

#742872 +(434)- [X]

<[Ko]Rob_e_lee1> ur retarted lol
<[ko]theuberelite> thats the most hypocritical statement I've ever heard.

#767215 +(2576)- [X]

<ahref> GOD
<ahref> BETRAYED BY MY PHONE
<ahref> I was at school, and this hot girl started talking to me
<ahref> And she was all like "Hey, you're not as geeky as I thought you were"
<ahref> And I'm like "Yeah, I know. I'm actually not geeky at all."
<ahref> And then my phone starts ringing
<ahref> And it's the FF7 victory theme

#803011 +(1042)- [X]

<Yalborap> You'll get so infuriated you'll throw your DS/Wiimote against the wall until it shatters.
<Yalborap> The wall, not the nintendo product.
<Yalborap> Those things are made of adamantium or some crap.

#881368 +(1019)- [X]

Enetheru: Freud... he'd have a ball with that.
Enetheru: Man, I wish he was still alive.
Enetheru: "Hey Freud, I want to introduce you to 4chan."
Enetheru: "Say Hi, 4chan."
Fizzkittens: Argh!
Enetheru: Freud wouldn't be able to do enough coke to keep up.

0.0660 21065 quotes approved; 893 quotes pending
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