QDB Admin 50 Random Quotes
Paypal Donate

#106 +(310)- [X]

<Acero> dude we could get a ounce of chronic just for jerking off into a cup!

#532 +(393)- [X]

<kisama> i've spent my last 5 new year's on either irc or aol

#1399 +(360)- [X]

<NCOIC> StarDog, you should see my electronic warfare arsenal. I've got virii and trojans and worms soo old they 'dropped them' from most defensive software...

#1556 +(540)- [X]

<@Patilla> hacking is cool
<@Patilla> i saw it done once in a movie

#2940 +(539)- [X]

<T_hibiki_> you catch your lady in bed with another man what do you do ?
<sparatik> tell him she has an STD

#3052 +(825)- [X]

<WillaCuz> shervin did u say u had a woman?
<shervin> WillaCuz: yeah but its losing pressure, i think it has a hole or something

#3523 +(357)- [X]

<JFalcon> sex is too much work... and the customers always complain.

#4257 +(888)- [X]

<dodge> fuck, thought somthing was wrong with my 's' key then, it kept repeating, looked down and it turns out i had my finger on it

#4394 +(-162)- [X]

<JustOnePepsi> I work at the walmart picture development center just to jerk off to the pics of naked babies taking baths

#6653 +(509)- [X]

<LR|Midnight> this ice cream owns
<[ice]> omfg
<[ice]> this Midnight cream 0wns

#7053 +(98)- [X]

<anarch> do you get to beat your pets like in dungeon keeper?
<Twinkcide> You can beat them and throw things at them!
<anarch> sweet
* Twinkcide throws anarch into the side of a mountain

#7841 +(114)- [X]

<Lizrdling> bunch other thatway doing swing.
<Lizrdling> bunch of me and others having a picnic.
<nebouxii> swinging? like having sex with each other?
<rob`> nebo; Stanford, not Berkeley.

#8372 +(256)- [X]

<Hito> Golden showers, fecal, fisting, bondage, S&M, cock-pumping, beastiality, dead people, babies, women, children, men, stuffed animals, trees, etc.
<Chubbzilla> ¤¦Hito¦¤ nice weekend planned

#11097 +(195)- [X]

(Louhi): mind u, I'm called "whats wrong with Cock teasers?"
(Pixie_Pete): Are they like malteasers?
* Waller buys a box of Cock teasers for Mother's Day as his mother's present

#12018 +(224)- [X]

<brokengolfclub> you would agree, as all westerners do, that rape is wrong correct ?
<PlexisKarma> yes, unless filmed correctly

#12347 +(787)- [X]

<@skold> is this going to be a 'my penis is bigger than yours' conversation? cuz i have a ruler and a camera.

#13406 +(441)- [X]

<@AJ-> [-amp-]: My girl might be, erm, uh, you know
<@[-amp-]> a man?

#22393 +(139)- [X]

(cubeman) there is a big fat bug in Joust 2
(cubeman) I just found it
(cubeman) you can make the pterry kill itself in the lava
(cubeman) you kill a few then...
(cubeman) you have a screen where you don't advance
(BenJos) So what if you have the bug kill itself in the lava? I mean what does the big fat bug in Joust 2 have to do with it?
(cubeman) ummmm
(cubeman) I believe you are trying to obfuscate my senses

#26282 +(275)- [X]

<Tirael> wtf is a haemophiliac?
<Tirael> someone who has sex w/ blood??

#26766 +(207)- [X]

<Spink> man
<Spink> I shot myself in the neck, that sucked
<Minion> it's too bad you obviously survived
<Spink> yeah
<Spink> If only it was a gun
<Spink> I'd probably be happier
<Minion> We'd all be happier
<Spink> jizz on my collar :/

#33213 +(363)- [X]

<Z28`> first of all my dad has a pretty large penis

#37838 +(66)- [X]

<WhatIWasGoing2SayHereDoesntFit> (maggots are technically still meat right?)

#38085 +(443)- [X]

<red13n> average blue whale produces over 400 gallons of sperm when it ejaculates, but only 10% of that actually makes it into his mate. So 360 gallons are spilled into the ocean everytime one unloads, and you wonder why the ocean is so salty.

#39429 +(47)- [X]

<@fdiv_bug> At least you didn't choose a nick of a guy who was in #gaymuscle. :(

#42830 +(230)- [X]

<K`> mithrandi: where's this bash.org ?

#43595 +(326)- [X]

<CyberBotX> did you know, Alt+Z makes your text go backwards.
<CyberBotX> .ereh ti did i ?ees
*** Kuraj[Away] (Kuraj@20A3E922.B822F138.49AB8999.IP) has left #bobandgeorge
*** Megami (Yasuragi@peacefulhaven-3342CAB4.tampabay.rr.com) has left #bobandgeorge
<Lady_Vahn|Balloon_Fight> !seod ti, looc yeh

#50906 +(42)- [X]

<Coult> im 65 years old
<Coult> and I still get more pussy than you
<Daishi> 11 y/o girls who you tricked with candy dont count
<Aamperix> I know.
<Aamperix> I feel bad for you.
<Aamperix> Hey little girl, want a Butterfinger? I have a nice Bitesize butterfinger...want one?

#50976 +(409)- [X]

<Ed> I like those upside-down ketchup bottles.
<Ed> They were a long time coming, but still.
<IQpierce> They were mentioned in Revelation, as a sign of the Apocalypse.
<IQpierce> "And yea, the moon shall become as fire, and fall into the sea, and the ketchup bottles, they shall invert themselves, and the winged bears shall pull the arms from the sockets of the faithful, in thy mercy."
<IQpierce> direct quote.
<Ed> They're apocalyptically convenient!
<IQpierce> That's why their slogan for this campaign is "Apocalycious!"
<IQpierce> And inside every cap is a free press-on 666 forehead tattoo!

#51139 +(132)- [X]

<@Bedwood> Btw, I am free to use my right hand to write with again!

#51196 +(1029)- [X]

* Idiot has quit IRC
<ChineseElite`> that'll be the day...

#54313 +(215)- [X]

<ChafedNut> I just downloaded the internet
<ChafedNut> it's pretty fly
<Batt0usai> Chafednut: can you burn it on a cd for me please
<ChafedNut> I will try...it may have some copyright protections
<Batt0usai> if you could fit it in a floppy it would be better actually
<Batt0usai> try zipping it
<ChafedNut> ok

#76013 +(338)- [X]

< []ikkebra[]werk> my brother uses Musicmatch Jukebox to play MP3s
< []ikkebra[]werk> we don't talk anymore
< []ikkebra[]werk> I think he just got married awhile ago

#76841 +(289)- [X]

<Scogeta> screw you.
<ShadowZirus> a/s/l?

#84735 +(311)- [X]

<ue-Soul_Chaser> yeah sniper, normally, you can't stick your penis all the way unless you would want to rip her cervix apart
<ue-Soul_Chaser> or, in your case, his rectum

#106393 +(593)- [X]

<evildoer> EXCERRENT
<Kitsa> what are you babbling on about?
<evildoer> EYE BOUGHT A NEW GITARE AND POLICE QUEST + SWAT COLACTIAN
<Kitsa> lol
<Kitsa> ah
<evildoer> IT ES TEHS QUALETY GITIR FOR 5 DOLARS
<Kitsa> flea market?
<evildoer> yas
<Kitsa> what did you barter, your spelling ability?

#140603 +(530)- [X]

(VapOr) what the command 2 setup the bunnyscript?
<Stormcaller> just press alt-f4 to bring up the setup menu
<@shp|away> format c:/q
[Q] VapOr has quit IRC - [Quit: FFS GOTO SLEEP NN ALL have sweet dreams]
<@shp|away> lol
<Stormcaller> ROFL
[J] VapOr has joined #lobby - [Woof@cloaked-18013.btinternet.com]
<Stormcaller> hahaha
* @shp|away points and laughs
<@shp|away> i think he meant ctrl-F4
[P] VapOr has left #lobby
[J] VapOr has joined #lobby - [Woof@cloaked-18013.btinternet.com]
<@shp|away> rofl
(VapOr) pfff
<@shp|away> sorry
<@shp|away> really
<Stormcaller> hah
<@shp|away> that was cheap
(VapOr) ok i d/l it then i installed it
<Stormcaller> next you'll be telling him its "/quit i am a ponce"
(VapOr) "/quit i am a ponce
[Q] VapOr has quit IRC - [Quit: i am a ponce]
[J] VapOr has joined #lobby - [Woof@cloaked-18013.btinternet.com]
<Stormcaller> lol
(VapOr) cool
(Diamond_Viper) lol fool
<@shp|away> well now he knows three new commands anyways

#146425 +(553)- [X]

<stray> i gotweed.net
<stray> im gonna gethigh.org
<drew-> havefun.com/youfuckingidiot

#151210 +(821)- [X]

<Mohjo> your puny sacks cannot hold me
<Mohjo> ... that made me sound like an overly large testicle

#175886 +(415)- [X]

<sFa-Stryder`mp5> im fucking 96% iq.

#180150 +(1561)- [X]

*** YOU has joined #gamedev
* YOU HAVE RECEIVED A FATAL ERROR, PRESS ALT + F4 TO REPAIR THIS IMMEDIATELY
<Waxycat> teh
<Waxycat> it says i recieved a fatal error
<posit> Waxycat: oh that happens some times, you have to press alt+f4 to fix it
<posit> *sometimes
<Waxycat> that quits irc
<Falnom> ALT+F4 quick!
<Waxycat> why?
* YOU HAVE 30 SECONDS TO RESTART MIRC
<posit> you have a fatal error
<Waxycat> otherwize?
<posit> if you don't restart it may damage your system
<Waxycat> it says i have 30 seconds
*** Waxycat has quit IRC []
<posit> damn yeah
<Palish> bahhahah.
*** Waxycat has joined #gamedev
* YOU HAVE RECEIVED A FATAL ERROR, PRESS ALT + F4 TO REPAIR THIS IMMEDIATELY
<Waxycat> what happened?
<Waxycat> again?!?!
<Waxycat> it says it again!
<posit> again?
<Waxycat> what should i do?!
<posit> maybe a config problem
<Waxycat> what will happen if i don't quit?
<posit> not sure exactly
<posit> but I don't think it's good
* YOU HAVE 30 SECONDS TO RESTART MIRC
*** Waxycat has quit IRC []

#352050 +(265)- [X]

twentydeadbodies: Now that you're gay you should be picking up all sorts of chicks.
Staticd00r: lol

#528007 +(1535)- [X]

<@Aprentice> girls who fuck animals should be put in a mental institute
<Rjx> or on TV

#627046 +(775)- [X]

<@generated> i wish i was dead
<@mehh_> generated: why? :(
<@mehh_> actually i really need to go...tell me some other time :)
<@mehh_> bbl

#632900 +(705)- [X]

<sdodson> can you provide that in wma format?
<Corydon76-home> Only if you can provide an encoder
<Corydon76-home> but it has to be able to run on my Apple IIgs
<Wonton> Wma sucks
<sdodson> you can encode oggs on your Apple IIgs?
<Corydon76-home> No, but if you're going to be an asshole about encoding formats, I'm going to be an asshole about the platform the encoder needs to run on.
<Catonic> lol

#662700 +(358)- [X]

<DaRk_oDiN>: So I get this notice in the mail saying my application was accepted at this college I applied to.
<DaRk_oDiN>: And I'm looking to get my degree in Computer Science and Technology from these people...
<DaRk_oDiN>: So, they schedule a placement test for me to take to see what ther classes I need to take.
<DaRk_oDiN>: That placement test happens to be on their website...
<DaRk_oDiN>: Turns out, their servers are friggen broken and I have to reschedule my placement test after witing for like two hours.
<DaRk_oDiN>: And I want these people to teach ME how to work on computers -_-
<DaRk_oDiN>: Maybe they wanted to show me the universal protocol of bullshitting your customers.
<DaRk_oDiN>: I mean, that's like me going to a culinary school and they're like "Sorry, we can't seem to figure out how this damn over turns on, you're gonna have to come back later."

#738981 +(1019)- [X]

<Bus> y = |x|
<JaxomZero> thats thinking positive

#760106 +(300)- [X]

<Bear> it's why it [LandRover Series 3] rattles on the motorway
<Locandez> Like a skeleton masturbating in a filing cabinet

#854899 +(2182)- [X]

<MugsyDaFish> i was peeing on the building and a cop rolls up on his bike
<MugsyDaFish> i told him, i hope you're not going to arrest me cuz i don't think ill be able to sit on the handlebars
<MugsyDaFish> i almost went to jail for that

#897655 +(3662)- [X]

<Josh> I don't understand why churches and 'family groups' spend millions of dollars a year on abstinence-only instruction when a World of Warcraft account only costs fifteen dollars a month and has a much better record of ensuring virginity.

#947918 +(153)- [X]

< Maiden945> oh that reminds me, i got told a story about Jerub on the weekend :)
< dawnstar> it's probably true
< Maiden945> i was told about the time Jerub did a burnout (or tried to :P) out of a ex-gf's street while they were dating lol
< zero> he must have pedalled like crazy for that

0.0527 21096 quotes approved; 1719 quotes pending
Hosted by Idologic: high quality reseller and dedicated hosting.
© QDB 1999-2022, All Rights Reserved.