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#9246 +(27)- [X]

<BiG_GuY> did u know mother fucker what im gonna to do
*** BiG_GuY Quit (Quit: Leaving)

#9252 +(255)- [X]

<Burnquist__> : /msg NickServ@services.dal.net IDENTIFY jillhanna
<Burnquist__> fuck
*** Burnquist__ (FBI@TeraPro33-41.cable-lynx.net) Quit (Killed (NickServ (Ghost command used by ne14a69)))

#9253 +(313)- [X]

centenarygirl: maybe someday, but not right now
RKM 82: "maybe someday" do you mean that, or is that just thrown in there to comfort me
centenarygirl: no.........I really mean it
<PizzaMind> maybe means "when I'm 30, my pussy is floopy, no one else wants me and I've finally grown out of liking assholes"

#9256 +(234)- [X]

<Outhouse> my wife is cool but when she starts that shit like, hold me, talk to me...it's like why?

#9258 +(55)- [X]

<Murder-Is-Funny> I get this huge kick of trying to talk people I judge as worthless into suicide

#9262 +(223)- [X]

Panny: I could sell my soul back to my ex for a computer.
RebelPrincess: don't.
Panny: I could sell my soul to Microsoft for a computer.
RebelPrincess: don't!!!!

#9264 +(9)- [X]

[02:21] * ekum is away, sleep [log:OFF] [page:OFF]
[02:21] * ekum is away, work [log:OFF] [page:OFF]

#9269 +(600)- [X]

<Brando457> wait NJ is east coast right
<PizzaMind> ...
<PizzaMind> dont you live in NJ?
<BRando457> yea

#9270 +(241)- [X]

<Brando457> is 1 KB bigger then a 700 MB disk ?

#9272 +(1523)- [X]

<Murder-Is-Funny> I know this girl who is supposedly kinda anti-social - so she says - and she's mentioned she doesnt go many places or have many friends.. - but when I call her, she's never home - whats that mean?
<Byte^> she has caller-id

#9277 +(75)- [X]

<EVOLinc> hes like ok this comodor 64 is state of the art

#9286 +(1845)- [X]

<jre> What should I read next, the Canterbury Tales, Don Quixote, or a book on Greek Mythology?
<GenericSuperhero> READE YW OLDE KANTVRBVRY TALES
<GenericSuperhero> THEYE ARE SHURE TO BEE VARY INTERASTINGE
<GenericSuperhero> HOPEFULLYE, YOU WILL READE IT IN THINE OLDE ENGLISHE
<EvilKosh> HELLO I AM JRE AND I HAVE TO READ HIGH FALOOTIN' BOOKS
<jre> GENARIKE, THOU ART AN FAGOTE OF THE LOW'ST ORDRE
<GenericSuperhero> THANKE YOU JAREE-EE
<jre> DAMN'D BE THOU SEED, AND MAY'ST IT NE'ER PRODUSE A PERSYONE OF ATTRAKTIVE CALIBAR
<GenericSuperhero> AYE, TISS MUSTVE HAPPENED TO YONDERS MOTHERE WHENCE THOU WAS CAPTURED WITHIN HER WOMBE!
<jre> THOU SPEAKST LIKE A RAGEING MANHAT
<GenericSuperhero> AH! THEN EYE SPEAKTH LIKE THINES FATHRE!

#9290 +(509)- [X]

<pork> gudrow: what about when you're driving and eating a sloppy meat pie and you sneeze really hard into the pie and squeeze it and the meat comes out and scalds your legs and you're doing 120 and can't do anything about it trying to wipe snot from your steering wheel and scalding hot pie
<pork> cause i did that once and it sucked

#9291 +(1026)- [X]

<jre> I wouldn't eat dolphin.  I refuse to eat anything smarter than me.  Which is why I abstain from broccoli.
<AmbushBug> I would love to only eat things smarter than me.
<AmbushBug> ...
<AmbushBug> I assume the silence is all of you standing agape at the opening i left for all of you.
<jre> Ambush:  It's too predictible.  We want originality in our comedy.
<jre> ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US

#9293 +(502)- [X]

<egg> i had beer for breakfast yesterday
<Raz> egg: I had YOU for breakfast yesterday
<Raz> BECAUSE YOUR NAME IS "EGG." AND I HAD AN EGG I AM A COMEDY GENIUS
<egg> Raz: If that were so, i'd be playing havoc with your colon
<Raz> egg: You did :[

#9297 +(9)- [X]

<[SZ]-Guest> hi
<[SZ]-Guest> wher i canfound a programe to hacking emails
<[SZ]-Guest> i need hacking program

#9299 +(438)- [X]

<angryskul> So I think we should allocate a new struct and...
<angryskul> Did someone just jump off the roof?

#9304 +(1632)- [X]

<jre> My underwear seems to be covered with a crusty white substance.  Is it anthrax?
<Zeluth> what does it smell like?
<jre> Like semen
<Zeluth> you have anthrax
<jre> The carton of milk was filled with some sort of milky-white liquid.  Is it anthrax?
<Zeluth> How good at you are pancake making?
<jre> Terrible.
<Zeluth> its anthrax
<jre> I opened my hole puncher to find a large collection of small white discs, about the size of a hole a hole-punch makes.  Is it anthrax?
<Zeluth> try inserting the paper disc in your urethra
<jre> Done, but I can't get it out now.
<Zeluth> congratulations yopu just gave yourself anthrax
<jre> I just received a parcel in the mail filled with a white powder.  An accompanying note informed me to "take penacilin now" and that "Allah is great".  Is it anthrax?
<^Vulpix^> jre: NOPE IT ISN'T, IT'S FREE COCAINE

#9322 +(12922)- [X]

<tag> Ouroboros: lets play Pong
<Ouroboros> Ok.
<tag> |    .
<Ouroboros> .    |
<tag> |  .
<Ouroboros>    . |
<tag> | .
<Ouroboros>      | .
<Ouroboros> Whoops

#9326 +(742)- [X]

<Scythe> caps lock is not your friend.
<Scythe> In fact, it is your mortal enemy and it made very disparaging remarks about your mother.

#9329 +(285)- [X]

<@PakiSpice> missy elliot bothers me
<fromtheashes> that video where she wore a garbage bag scared the bejesus outta me
<fromtheashes> im a supa fly, supa dupa fly
<@PakiSpice> yea
<@PakiSpice> i think it left me somewhat scarred
<fromtheashes> why don't you supa dupa fly your fat ass out of a 4th story window
<fromtheashes> and stop giving me nightmares

#9330 +(311)- [X]

<heath> then wouldn't being vegetarian mess up the food chain doing the ecological system harm?
<heath> just a thought...
<hoemonkey> yeah.....cause then you let the cows think that they're better.. and then the cows will start eating us. good point, heath.

#9331 +(712)- [X]

<@reflexive> does your book tell me how to get rid of a sore throat?
<mattlesko> let me look
<mattlesko> pg. 130
<mattlesko> "stop sucking cock"

#9335 +(966)- [X]

<go_die> brena how do you feel about jewish people
<Brena> what kind of question is that?
<go_die> im just making conversation
<go_die> why are you getting all defensive, hitler

#9336 +(1298)- [X]

<Undertow-TOoL> You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is

#9337 +(234)- [X]

<reflexive> i hate how in the movies.. they still show catholic churches, where the priest places the communion on the tongue.
<heath> he normally just puts his cock on there now.

#9342 +(119)- [X]

<dream> five girls.
<dream> and he's fucking all of them behind all of their backs.
<@reflexive> that's a lot of poon.
<@plutonium> and herpes.

#9343 +(748)- [X]

<ShaneBe> i think i just realized what i have been doing wrong with my life.
<ShaneBe> i make goals... but the goals are things like:
<ShaneBe> "I am going to eat this 10-pack of tacos if it kills me."

#9346 +(504)- [X]

<bob> you're like "i want something that uses gtk :(" and redhat's like "YOU MUST NOW INSTALL GNOME-CORE; GNOME-TOYS; GNOME-QUAKE; GNOME-PRETTY-CAT-THAT-DANCES-ON-YOUR-WINDOWZ"
<bob> "Press Space Bar to install 1986 Space Shuttle Schematics"
<bob> "Or Enter to install HAM RADIO to RealPlayer signal converter"
<bob> "Or press nothing, and I will Reboot"

#9347 +(672)- [X]

[02:18:04] s7ank: i want to be one of those guys that types
"s/j&jd//.^$ueu*///djsls/sm."
and it's a perl script that turns dog crap into gold.

#9349 +(476)- [X]

<[DeViL]WaRzO> chufty decode this plz
<[DeViL]WaRzO> cerom: (11:22 PM) I know but talking with who speak's English as a motherlanguage.
<[DeViL]Chufty> it means "add me to your ignore list"

#9353 +(148)- [X]

01:52PM <s7ank> i got a mailbox today!
<s7ank> there was a magnet avertising quicken in it!
<s7ank> it has my name on it! the mailbox i mean! not the magnet,
that'd be silly.
<ShaneBe> not with the power of TODAYS direct marketing!

#9355 +(155)- [X]

<BTox> wow... oi can see the reflection of my fingers on the monitor..
so i can watch myself type and it looks really weird. "how do i do that?!"
<ShaneBe> it really is amazing
<ShaneBe> to see peop;e ty[e

#9357 +(682)- [X]

*** bad-_-girl has joined #devil
<[DeViL]Man> hi bad girl
<[DeViL]Man> just how bad are you?
<bad-_-girl> vey bad
<bad-_-girl> very bad
<[DeViL]Man> bad at spelling? or something else?

#9358 +(121)- [X]

<treph> when the topic is something that I care about? that's circular definition. sorry.
<ShaneBe> what do you care about?
<treph> I care when the argument considers present or imminent action.
<treph> and also when it's mathematical - in the old sense of mathematical
<ShaneBe> like whether or not to remove yourself from burning buildings?
<treph> yeah.

#9359 +(117)- [X]

<stank> but copying data to a floppy disk and back makes it lose integrity! like dubbing a tape!

#9360 +(210)- [X]

<[DeViL]Hawk> dammit u sothern punk my mums rich i looked at the price list
<FanBoy|Away> er? your mum is on a price list...figures

#9363 +(261)- [X]

<[DeViL]PsYcHo> it'll be lonely this christmas, without you to hold
<[DeViL]Chufty> psycho you getting circumsized for christmas?!

#9370 +(1797)- [X]

<stank> guys.. i went out tonight.
<stank> i pretended to be a normal college student.
<stank> and i stood uncomfortably on a porch with a bunch of people i don't know.
<stank> but then i ran into bill and will, who were pretending in the same way.
<stank> so we talked about networks and i felt better.

#9372 +(382)- [X]

<treph> I have my computer
<treph> and
<treph> no job.
<treph> > i
<treph> You are carrying:
<treph> a computer
<treph> no job

#9386 +(242)- [X]

(gENERIC) who the hell came up with the word twat?
(gENERIC) that's the suavest thing i've heard next to love-tunnel

#9388 +(230)- [X]

<KooLLaiD> Your a fucking Morron

#9391 +(422)- [X]

<Cienna> were you breast fed?
<Ragnarok> yes
<Ragnarok> recently in fact

#9396 +(415)- [X]

<evad> speaking of fucking sheep..
<Vod> what would you know about fucking sheep? I bet you don't even know about the making the right slits in your wellington boots to put their back legs down so they can't get away?

#9399 +(214)- [X]

<Ragnarok> i kinda like that
<Ragnarok> i dig the natural look
<haole> then you'll be quite pleased with her crotch afro
<haole> it looks like a 70s blaxploitation extra

#9403 +(49)- [X]

<FOCK> god damn
<FOCK> every fucking one of these clients  blow
<FOCK> ugh... unknown internal command (/me)
<rude> hahah
<CIA> ./action
<rude> dude, throw that trash out
<FOCK> i need to lay the smackdown on this fucker
<rude> /ctcp #chan action :stuff
<FOCK> no BitchX for BeOS
<rude> maybe you don't need the :
<FOCK> *ANGERRRRRR*
<rude> what're you doin' on be?
<FOCK> no wonder this os hasnt taken off, no decent irc clients

#9406 +(361)- [X]

<vim> heh, no wonder i cant hear shit... trying to play this damn redhat cd.

#9408 +(30)- [X]

<me> reeteth are thou who in the name of reetness and uber, shephards the unreet through the valley of vodness
<me> for he is truly his fggt's brother, and the finder of lost danistanis, and i will strike down upon thee with great hax0rness and furious reetness, those who attempt to get root and pwn my brothers, and you will know my name is hp, when i lay my hax0r skillz upon thee, heh

#9413 +(732)- [X]

(@Bean): rofl
(@Bean): I asked my g/f too marry me, she took me seriously

#9417 +(150)- [X]

(Psy`): Skins tell crespo when he comes back
(@Skins): hopefully he has brains to read topic
(@Skins): actually i best wait


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