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#666537 +(694)- [X]

<mima> i have found further proof that irc users are the result of an anti-social break in existence.
<mima> i just went into a bunch of different channels, said "SMILE!~ =D" and everyone said, 'wtf?', 'seriously?', 'what?', or i got kicked out.

#666666 +(668)- [X]

<Brian> Hahaha... I spent two hours just so I could get an evil quote number on bash.
<DaKemoBoy> The only thing evil about that is the time you wasted. :)

#666814 +(542)- [X]

<Curt^> and mexicans try so hard to goto my land
<Filefragg> electric fences would help
<Curt^> Mexicans would just use them as a power source

#666982 +(1050)- [X]

<LavenderD> >:)
<LavenderD> Evil smile or sad jew, you decide.

#667273 +(2137)- [X]

<bi0h4z4r_> north korea is test firing missiles right now
<bi0h4z4r_> on fox news
<@argv[0]> thats where i would test my missiles too
<@argv[0]> fox news headquarters

#667467 +(1223)- [X]

<@kiafaldorius> is it just me or is it cool that 1337 (string) converted to hex becomes 31333337?

#667490 +(2956)- [X]

<Pedlya> So I got this really big usb drive, and me and my dad are trying to put shit on it.
*Simpe has entered #cancelled
<Pedlya> my dad said its too big, and I guess it was
<Pedlya> so my mom comes in and is trying to push it in...it still didnt go in
<Pedlya> my brother uses his and it fits fine, so we just use his
* Simpe has quit IRC (I dont want to know dude... )

#667596 +(1832)- [X]

(Patrick82): i have multiple personalities
(tkam): the one that tells you to kill yourself obviously isn't getting its fair share of time

#667626 +(1612)- [X]

<Frostfyre> Alright. 5 reasons why I'm convinced that my penis runs Linux.
<Frostfyre> 1. I can create child processes
<Frostfyre> 2. I can handle multiple users on any platform at once.
<Frostfyre> 3. I'm VERY user friendly.
<Frostfyre> 4. I have incredible uptime.
<Frostfyre> and 5. When my system load gets too heavy, I end up dumping my core and the system shuts down.

#667639 +(-208)- [X]

<leeg> I heard that Vista will support Duke Nukem Forever OOTB

#667677 +(305)- [X]

<@kazin> why does php have 'echo' and 'print'?  Do they do different things?
<Bluefoxicy> kazin:  echo prints in a big empty room.

#667747 +(248)- [X]

KrazyKanuk: the canadian customs people rule
KrazyKanuk: i get to the border right, coming from the us
KrazyKanuk: and the guard asks me if i have any weapons in the car
KrazyKanuk: im like, im CANADIAN, what do u think?
KrazyKanuk: he let me through without another word

#667762 +(909)- [X]

<Ghaleon> I'm a programmer for a company that ports english made games to the japanese market
<PcChip> Make one say "ALL YOUR BASE" in japanese to get back at them.

#667770 +(2800)- [X]

(sean__) i want to call you with my cell phone whats your #
(@Pain`) (911)-323-4155
(sean__) dude you made me call the cops what the fuck

#667811 +(153)- [X]

* Digi disconnects
<Eliza> you're still here
* Digi has disconnected
<Eliza> you're still here
* Digi has disconnected
<Eliza> you're still here
* Digi has disconnected
<Digi> I HAVE DISCONNECTED DAMMIT D:

#667868 +(884)- [X]

<demonotaku_> hate when you fall asleep and your cat jumps on your keyboard
<Facemaker> Yeah, they always talk about you on irc behind your back

#667958 +(794)- [X]

Boboray202: If Intelligent Design existed, my hand would be self-lubricating!

#668041 +(585)- [X]

<ilius> I'm a canadian
<ilius> theyre sending me on a peacekeeping mission somewhere undisclosed as of yet
<sanzo> i think you mean "im going to try and stop a genocide in africa without weapons"

#668060 +(2847)- [X]

kixor: well, how are you going to get around the north american ip ban?
Kovia: duh, last i checked i live in texas
Kovia: and texas is south america
Kovia: way to go, idiot

#668250 +(1076)- [X]

<rewind> look! I know how to do YMCA!!
<rewind> \o/ |o| /o_ /o\

#668269 +(1448)- [X]

<jab> I just installed some windows updates
<jab> and then Windows Update told me I had some security vulnerabilities in my windows software
<jab> I click OK and the list of vulnerabilities comes up and one of them says "Internet Explorer is not your default browser."

#668361 +(-9)- [X]

<@Nefro> so Pirates Of The Caribbean 2 sucked?
<malakian> yeah
<malakian> it sucks hard
<malakian> then swallows, sadly
<malakian> so you dont even see the climax.

#668899 +(755)- [X]

<Caius> in the last year I've broken the screen on: SE S700i, SE P910i, iPod 40GB, Pentax S6, Palm Zire 72 (and slightly before the last year, Palm M100)
<Libertus> Caius: Have you considered pen and paper?

#668963 +(868)- [X]

<wordup> i talk very little
<mop> font size 2?

#668964 +(1954)- [X]

<syc> buddy of mine licked a motherboard once while the machine was running
<syc> no problems
<Skiz> I disagree
<Skiz> your friend has problems

#669058 +(2870)- [X]

WindMage1: my cat already had kittens a month ago
WindMage1: we took her in to get fixed, and they're like "We can't... she's pregnant"
WindMage1: and I said "That bitch said she was on the pill!"
WindMage1: and then there was very awkward silence in the vet's office

#669166 +(159)- [X]

<roric23> i just pulled an elastic thread out of my sock and now I'm flossing with it :)
<Pace|Around> yay for Sock Floss
<rigelIsGood> Dude, that is kinda gross.
<roric23> well, yeah. it does sort of have that sock-like flavor to it
<roric23> not that I taste socks for a living or anything
<Pace|Around> Well, if you ever want to, you now have something to put on your resume

#669403 +(1934)- [X]

(@damned) one time, my mom asked me if she copied something, and then unplugged the mouse and plugged it into another computer she could paste it

#669417 +(69)- [X]

phoenix8634: are you legally downloading music yet or no?
TwiztidTown: ROFL
TwiztidTown: what is that?
phoenix8634: k ill take that as a no
TwiztidTown: you can LEGALLY DOWNLOAD MUSIC?
TwiztidTown: LOL AND ALL THIS TIME I WAS DOING IT FOR FREE

#669587 +(4046)- [X]

<Argentius> I fell asleep again in class today...
<Darkersun> that sucks man, what did the teacher do?
<Argentius> I am the  teacher >.<

#669622 +(813)- [X]

<Silly-Wurk> how ironic.  Shell Oil claims that using foodcrops to make biofuels would be 'morally inappropriate' as long as there are people starving in the world.
<Taffer> an oil company has morals now?
<Taffer> will they be shipping these foodcrops to starving people in empty oil barrels/tankers?
<WyldWork> Absolutely, along with barrels of unrefined love and good will

#669708 +(941)- [X]

(+[CSI]ACE-340) anybody want to buy my motorcycle and then loan me $3500
(@Ic3x^) what kind of motorcycle
(+[CSI]ACE-340) gsx-r1100
(@Ic3x^) erm, not my style... I don't like speed bikes
(+[CSI]ACE-340) it can go slow too

#669735 +(1031)- [X]

<veryinky> Personally I'd rather be adopted. Since it would mean that I was picked instead of randomly produced.

#669898 +(1478)- [X]

whatshisname: Why does the media insist on calling intelligent design an 'alternative' to the theory of evolution?
That's like saying pancakes are a good alternative to an internal combustion engine.
What units do you use for measuring Godliness?
mediaho: Cleanliness?
whatshisname: I was thinking more along the lines of Jehovahwatts: "It took 47.3 Jehovahwatts to turn that water into wine"
MrNeutron: "Wha. . . what the hell is a Jehovahwatt"
Smallberries: About 103 Jews.
pwhp_67: Are Jehovawatts metric?
jimmyhaha: Commie.

#669946 +(197)- [X]

<Gabe> lol i didnt like the diary of anne frank
<FraudulentTommah> if anne frank was alive today would she make a livejournal
<Super_Moogle> The Livejournal of Anne Frank
<Super_Moogle> "Mood: Happy :))"

#669947 +(386)- [X]

<Neal[CoNWork]> Not everyone's goal in life is to malign you
<DarkPaladin> Your's seems to be
<Neal[CoNWork]> Yeah, but I said "Not everyone's"
<Neal[CoNWork]> That doesn't mean nobody

#669955 +(-1285)- [X]

<Pbob> you know what would be awesome
<Pbob> Get a bunch of jews, herd them into a shower
<Pbob> And then gas them
<Pbob> With that funny voice stuff
<Pbob> HAHA
<Pbob> They would be like I'M GONNA DIE sounding like crazy cartoon charatcers

#669961 +(3030)- [X]

<WeirdBeard> well my dad is icelandic, my mother is cuban
<WeirdBeard> i'm an icecube

#669963 +(2535)- [X]

* | gets lazy
* | is now known as _

#669969 +(928)- [X]

<mocker> I just need to do more than play video games on my day off
<Homeworld> but playing games is awesome
<mocker> I wanna play RL sometime
<Homeworld> rl is boring
<Astorite> RL doesn't have enough upgrades.
<mocker> RL has tons of upgrades, they are just much much harder to get
<mocker> and not as fun
<Astorite> Well, yeah, I guess it's just a lot harder to gain XP and GP.
<mocker> I need to find myself a 'sploit
<Astorite> They've got some, but the Mods are hella anal about 'em.
<Astorite> They're all like, "Crack isn't a legal income producer." or "You have to go to College to say you know how to do that skillset."
<mocker> they are just power-trippin mods jeez

#669982 +(1225)- [X]

<Awaken> this is pissing me off
<Awaken> i have some windows updates that just HAVE to restart my fucking computer
<{RANT}> :(
* MaxPower (M4dMaX@ool-182f05ac.dyn.optonline.net) Quit (hub.efnet.us ircd.he.net)
* {Bitch} (~yeah@cpe-069-134-207-100.nc.res.rr.com) Quit (hub.efnet.us ircd.he.net)
* aliensoup (~aliensoup@heimdal.complx.net) Quit (hub.efnet.us ircd.he.net)
* Jing|es (Jingles@cpe-24-167-108-167.satx.res.rr.com) Quit (hub.efnet.us ircd.he.net)
* Ladywork (victoria.r@host86-140-223-138.range86-140.btcentralplus.com) Quit (hub.efnet.us ircd.he.net)
* TostigAFK (~Tostig@ip68-8-64-254.sd.sd.cox.net) Quit (hub.efnet.us ircd.he.net)
<Mr_Power> his computer is the EFnet server?

#670048 +(996)- [X]

( Tranks ) when i try to go on my webcam it says 'Sorry you have no video capture hardware' << whats that o.0 /q
( Voltage ) I thought the police told you to stop using webcam after you got caught flashing to 13 year old  bisexual boys
( Tranks ) I havnt bin caught
( Voltage ) so you do flash to 13 year old boys
Tranks has left #Cyber
( Fr0r3 ) Voltage you prick i didnt get his msn

#670063 +(250)- [X]

<JohnMaron7> JaySea We believe that the Apostles at the Last Supper were not drinking wine, for Jesus said to them "This is My BLOOD".
<JaySea> JohnMaron7: "Oh no!  There's blood in my alcohol system!"

#670077 +(-131)- [X]

Baumann: you're like... british and stuff, right
Kevin Smith: like....and stuff, yes
Baumann: so you know soccer?
Baumann: I know, that's like saying "You're american, right? ...so you're fat."
Kevin Smith: football
Kevin Smith: vaguely
Baumann: Pay attention to the world cup any?
Kevin Smith: there's a world cup?
Baumann: you don't think the world just floats in space, do you?
Kevin Smith: pretty much
Baumann: Everyone knows that it sits in a cup
Baumann: That's why no one lives in antartica
Baumann: ...or something
Kevin Smith: right
Baumann: Well, I'm just pissed that Zidane got the golden ball
Kevin Smith: ok, I have no idea what the golden ball is
Kevin Smith: but it sounds impractical
Baumann: yeah, they don't even actually use it
Baumann: man... now I want to visit antarctica
Kevin Smith: \o/

#670081 +(-124)- [X]

<tomalak> you still appear to be under 12 months of age
<tomalak> btw putting your age in your nick is very immature
<@argv[0]> yes tom, im 0 years old
<tomalak> AND A DAY

#670118 +(522)- [X]

<ChaoSynergy> BODY MASSAAGE!
<ChaoSynergy> Where'd that extra 'a' come from
<narunet> My ass
<axiel> you mean your ss

#670120 +(535)- [X]

atria ventric: so my life is complete
Crikers042: whys that?
atria ventric: because today
atria ventric: i heard two gay guys shopping for a vaccuum
atria ventric: 'but i bet this one sucks better'
atria ventric: 'but this one will go for longer'
atria ventric: 'go longer? what for? you get dirty you take it out you turn it on and you're done'
atria ventric: 'i mean its fun while it lasts sure but its nothing serious'

#670121 +(2220)- [X]

<sigafoo> i realized i loved my girlfriend when i said to her
<sigafoo> <3
<sigafoo> and she said "<3.14159265" back...

#670129 +(1092)- [X]

<Dooley>omg </3
<Mstandot>What does that smiley represent?
<mictoboy>a vasectomy

#670145 +(489)- [X]

Primate how do you do actions?
Primate ??
@DjinnWraith slaps Primate around with a /me action
Primate how'd you do that?


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