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#445381 +(349)- [X]

<PetrDoubt> By the way, you misspelled "B4s74rd."
<B4s73rd> no way
<PetrDoubt> way
<PetrDoubt> It's easy to spell if you remember it has "74rd" in it.

#445388 +(657)- [X]

<F7> nifty
<F7> its nice to have a working laptop again
<F7> now i can be unproductive anywhere

#445396 +(471)- [X]

[ Stryker  ) OMGZ ASLZ
[ Stryker  ) ^_^
[ AnFguy   ) omg like
[ AnFguy   ) 14/f/naked
[ Stryker  ) omg like
[ Stryker  ) 13/f/OMG
[ Stryker  ) w/ pix ^_^
[ AnFguy   ) pix u say>
[ AnFguy   ) we should do tradsies
[ Stryker  ) omgz you have piz too?!?!
[ Stryker  ) HERE_THEY_ARE_JPG.EXE

#445431 +(199)- [X]

<FireCat> Hmm, just wondered if using Windows, IIS, Mysql, and PHP would be called a WiMP platform :)
<modn> roflmfao

#445438 +(250)- [X]

<diegost> omfg lol
<diegost> i tried to change my gmail pass to "boobies" and it went like...
<diegost> "please use another password, the one you hv just entered is very used on the internet" ^^

#445447 +(439)- [X]

<Patrick`> holy crap, I'm 20 on wednesday
<Patrick`> I'd better get pregnant in the next 5 days or I'll miss out on the best part of being a teen

#445469 +(345)- [X]

NipokNek: I can tell it's christmas time cause my p2p programs are serving more xmas music and less porn. :D

#445492 +(1382)- [X]

<redbud> so i was sitting there listening to some ska with your girlfriend
<redbud> then all of a sudden she started making sexual advances towards me
<Micah> wait a second
<Micah> nobody listens to ska

#445539 +(392)- [X]

<mattbuck> !pball
<mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> i would start by kissin you softly on your lips
<mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> whilst undoin your shirt
<mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> then i wud move down your neck and start kissing your chest
<mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> all the while i woould be undoin your belt and your trousers
<mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> i would then rekease your long hard throbbin cock from your underware
<mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> and move my tongue down from your chest to your waist onto your penix
<mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> *penis
<mattbuck> not that one AGAIN!
<mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> then i wud give u the best head of your life
<mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> and i will let your imagination take you from there
<mattbot2> | !pball 10 | <Peel> NOW can i have my ops back?

#445639 +(939)- [X]

<deltabravo> ughh, this beer is terrible.
<deltabravo> it's a bad sign when the beer company isn't running any sweepstakes, yet all the lids
             say 'SORRY' underneath them :<

#446067 +(1376)- [X]

<MaxPowers87>               (  SUN   )   o   o   o<-Earth   o   ( ) -(-)-  o    o    .

#446104 +(425)- [X]

<Flatland> turducken should not exist
<Anomaly> Eh?
<Flatland> a duck stuffed inside a chicken stuffed inside a turkey
<Flatland> the ultimate example of our domination of the animal kingdom

#446107 +(366)- [X]

(Cap`nRoy) I hate salt
(Cap`nRoy) but I am the saltiest of the sea-dogs
(KaLdAiS712) If you were to lick Cap`nRoy, you would die of salt.
(KaLdAiS712) Also several venerial diseases.

#446122 +(444)- [X]

<MessedRocker> In Hawai'i, the age [of concent] is 14
<Anakha> brb hawaii

#446273 +(222)- [X]

<Joghurt^> hell yeah i want some lego porn

#446297 +(161)- [X]

<%TTK> How would I start overclocking
<mikeszewil> don't know
<+Fizban30> first
<+Fizban30> open the box
<+Fizban30> make sure its on
<+Fizban30> and stick a knife in random spots
<+Fizban30> when you feel the zap your done

#446305 +(392)- [X]

<CrazyHarij> But stuff like that messes up your mind.. try imagining what really is outside the universe and stuff like that.. or what happened before big bang / the creation, and before that and before that
<BadHat> yeah, and where the fuck the remote's at

#446388 +(633)- [X]

(+teh|irc) infact the smartest thing that came out of her mouth was my dick

#446427 +(359)- [X]

<Thanatos> Let me touch your bountiful lips once more ere I plonge into the emptyness that the world is without your touch
<Musashi> translation: suck me, woman

#446429 +(942)- [X]

<Gladiator> Jesus christ, my mom is so fucking stupid
<Gladiator> She was complaining to me about how "all the french stereotype us"

#446471 +(284)- [X]

<The_Fallen> He, two years ago we were at the computer lab and my friends, a dumbass farmer, wrote in the adress bar : "I wanna see a website about car, please, thanks alot"
<The_Fallen> Oh, My, Fucking, God.

#446593 +(740)- [X]

<Wafflehaus> Name someone not involved in politics
<@Baldfresh> george bush

#446630 +(373)- [X]

<Invictus> Which professions are you getting?
<Shadow> huh?
<Invictus> I told you to read the manual. =p
<Shadow> I got drunk instead.

#446714 +(1195)- [X]

<inertia> i was looking up russian shirts on ebay
<inertia> my lithuanian friend has gotten lots of marxist/socialist stuff off of there
<inertia> they sell red beach towels with a yellow insignia of the sickle and hammer for like 20 bucks
<inertia> i might buy one
<Bl1tz> lol
<Bl1tz> that is sweet
<Bl1tz> although painfully ironic
<inertia> how??
<Bl1tz> paying 20$ for a towel that has a symbol of everything that was wrong with paying 20$ for a towel

#446742 +(-957)- [X]

<Dee> A man walked along and saw a ladder going up into the heavens
<Dee> he climbed up a ladder and saw an ugly woman
<Dee> the woman said: 'Take me now or climb the ladder to success'
<Dee> the man got freaked out and started climbing the ladder frantically
<Dee> on the next level, he saw a plain looking woman
<Dee> the woman said: 'Take me now or climb the ladder to success'
<Dee> seeing a pattern here, the man climbs the ladder again
<Dee> on the next ladder, he saw a really hot woman, very beautiful and sexy
<Dee> the woman said: 'Take me now or climb the ladder to success'
<Dee> the man is tempted, but thinks, 'If the woman is hot here, imagine what it would be like in the next level!' and he climbs the ladder
<Dee> on that level there was this fat ugly hell's angel, with a fucking long beard, piercings and decorated with tattoos
<Dee> the man screamed "who the fuck are you?!"
<Dee> the hell's angel said "i am cess"

#446767 +(373)- [X]

<lou> remember, as long as our balls don't touch it's not GAY

#446814 +(307)- [X]

<FuRiOuS1> how bout a place where u can post something u need, like an answer to a question, or something, anything. this will all be categorized. ppl can post replies
<FuRiOuS1> help eachother
<braindancer> newsgroups?
<braindancer> forums?
<FuRiOuS1> fuck

#446861 +(957)- [X]

<MikeH> hey nirgle, since youve worked with php and im guessing have done a bit with sessions, whats the easiest way to keep track of multiple form entries spaced out among multiple pages, and then at the end when all is said and done, write said form entries to a text file ?
<nirgle> hmm, i'll think about it in the shower
<nirgle> brb
--time passes--
<nirgle> i lost my train of thought in the shower
<nirgle> and was thinking about lawn gnomes
<nirgle> sorry

#446884 +(568)- [X]

<Zeroblitzt> My seat at the Rush concert sucked :(
<TheDarthster> was it at the front?

#446931 +(2672)- [X]

<tHiSiSbOb> I just lost a friend... He got into a car accident... Young people can die too. I just played starcraft with him the other day....
<black_mage_s> Well, there is always the single player campaign.

#447149 +(2499)- [X]

spE4Ce pREtZEL01: how do I end up being a therapist for all my old gfs
OMGIMJ4KE: comes with the territory
OMGIMJ4KE: same thing happened with mine
spE4Ce pREtZEL01: not that I mind, I love 'em all
spE4Ce pREtZEL01: collect 'em, trade 'em, show 'em to your friends
OMGIMJ4KE: gotta catch em all
spE4Ce pREtZEL01: Wendymon, I choose you! Bipolar attack!
OMGIMJ4KE: "Im happy! Now im sad!"
OMGIMJ4KE: Monster is confused!

#447150 +(798)- [X]

<SupaShaD> i hate it when people invite me to eat dinner at their house
<SupaShaD> cuz then i have to act all polite and shit
<SupaShaD> when all i really wanna do is eat the food and then go fuck their daughter

#447190 +(1177)- [X]

<f|ywork> 1 of our students has got himself in a spot of bother. He booked out a dv cam and a firewire hard drive from the helpdesk, then videoed some chick giving him head and forgot to delete it from the hd when he returned it
<TBBwork> do u have a copy of this video?
<f|ywork> it's rendering in premiere as we speak

#447245 +(276)- [X]

<ik0n:#2600> It doesn't take much more then a bored college student, and an ounce of pot to spawn a new warez network.

#447278 +(851)- [X]

<[UCR]FYZZIX> CAPS LOCK: ITS LIKE THE CRUISE CONTROL FOR AWESOME

#447304 +(756)- [X]

David> Mexicans are some hardworking motherfuckers.
David> This area LOVES mexicans.
David> Because of all the farms and such around here.
David> Particularly the mushroom farms.
David> It's hard to find workers for such places
David> But those fuckers could put together a house in a few hours if they'd never picked up a hammer before
David> As opposed to white people
David> Who would think about it for a few seconds
David> Then call the contractor
David> Who would assign a foreman
David> Who would hire mexicans to do it

#447374 +(1049)- [X]

<Jay 2 da K> no ill probably just get it for christmas
<cyberkk21> hah you jesus boy
<Jay 2 da K> what are you getting for ramadan, besides hungry

#447397 +(423)- [X]

<@ping> my ex was Mennonite
<@ping> well, is
<Xolution> What the hell does being from Minnesota have to do with anything?
<@ping> are you really that stupid?

#447416 +(550)- [X]

Gamerman2601: (>^_(>O.o)> HOMOSEXUAL KIRBY
Gamerman2601: :D
Gamerman2601: lol
Hachi: XD
Gamerman2601: (>^_(>^_(>O_o) THREESOME!
Hachi: oh god
Gamerman2601: :D
Gamerman2601: (>^-^)> ~~ (>^-^)> ~~ <(;;o_o;;)> ~~ <(^_^<) ~~ <(^_^<) KIRBY BUKKAKE!
Hachi: XD]

#447426 +(770)- [X]

<Whiffles> Quit thinking!!
<God> I'm sorry.  *becomes christian*

#447513 +(130)- [X]

<Aryk> i need to make a shirt.... "You're so much sexier when you just SHUT UP!"

#447542 +(612)- [X]

<PuddleDuck> God damn it times have changed
<PuddleDuck> ah, there was once a time when we were called secret admirers
<PuddleDuck> but now we are just called stalkers :(

#447564 +(205)- [X]

<Tinted_Green> "oh lord who is idling in #heaven, 1337 be your skillz"

#447571 +(567)- [X]

< RichiH> so, there was this big "companies tell you how great they are" day, today. to make sure people went from stand to stand, you had to pick up small stickers, put them on a A4 sheet and if you collected all of them, filled out your name, et al, you had a chance to win a kickass laptop
< RichiH> when it was time for the drawing, the roon was packed. i would guess about 1000 people, a bit more, perhaps..
< RichiH> they draw the winner and someone i personally can not stand wins the laptop
< RichiH> he walks down to the laptop and is happy as a clam. he needs to show his student id so they know he really does study here
* RichiH hears needle drop, everyone is listening to me. badger badger badger
< asg> yes
< asg> :)
< Phated> Go on.
< RichiH> so anyway, that guy mentions the id is from last semester. the other guy says that should not be too much of a problem and asks the room about it. not really serious, just a side pun
< RichiH> about 1000 voices shout "NO!" at the same time
< RichiH> guy is sent back, another one is drawn, show over
< RichiH> we were laughing so hard.. :)

#447591 +(2361)- [X]

<KK> Anyone here speak Spanish?
<ste> i do
<KK> Shut up.  You can't even speak English.
<ste> thats cuz i spanish

#447596 +(748)- [X]

<@topsoil> The College Jeopardy winner wagered $1,337 in Final Jeopardy... seems more like the geek hero to me :)
<@topsoil> I was hoping he'd come back and lose and then Alex would be like, "Sorry to say this...but you wagered $1337 and lost, which now means, *holds up sign* 'j00 4r3 n0t 1337.'"
<@topsoil> Either that or Alex would just look at him and say, "pwn3d".

#447663 +(733)- [X]

<WarrioR> The Weakest Link) is fascinating program. They ask a bunch of people questions and they keep getting rid of the dumbest person, so just the smartest person is left. It is kind of the opposite way we elect a president.

#447745 +(745)- [X]

<+Aegis> fried chicken and malt liquor
<+Onic> what you using fried chicken and malt liquor for other than the obvious Aegis
<+Aegis> bait
<+Aegis> my TV was stolen

#447757 +(537)- [X]

[+MrCow] linux=allah
[+MrCow] people like it but are scared to say it
[+MrCow] then you get the random people
[+MrCow] who run in with bombs screaming LINNUXXXXXXX WINDOWS SUCKS LINNUXXXXXXX

#447828 +(1842)- [X]

NgOs_WiLL: how many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb?
NgOs_WiLL: One to change it and fifteen to form a support group!
E30SupeR: it's a trick question - feminists can't change anything.


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