#166434 +(493)- [X]
<TheShadowHunter> Im still afraid to ask if I did anything unusual while on morphine. I dont remember it really affecting me at all but for all I know I couldve been running up and down the halls naked and pushing old people out of wheelchairs.
<TheShadowHunter> Thats something I prefer to do while entirely coherent.
#166449 +(252)- [X]
disinfo46and2 wants to send file C:Program FilesEvan's StuffStuffMR. BUNGLE - Squeeze Me Macaroni.mp3.
disinfo46and2: I wish this shit would bing or something when it's complete
disinfo46and2: Seriousy, fucking AIM is less sophisticated than my microwave
disinfo46and2: Hell, my microwave plays a song when it's done
#166516 +(364)- [X]
<GreenFux> gym music always sounds like porn music for some reason
<Rakekniven> Same with 60's and 70's educational film strips.
<Rakekniven> Whoever would've guesed that Oxygen and Hydrogen enjoy bonding to the same music as Bunny Love and Brock Stiffy.
<GreenFux> i think that i will formulate a theory that the universe is powered by hot steamy sex
<GreenFux> it makes more sense than string theory right away
#166558 +(355)- [X]
DesusGrimm: Get out of the bitter barn and play in the hay!
DesusGrimm: someone actually put that as their info.
DesusGrimm: someone that I once made out with.
Lord Galadriel: meagan
DesusGrimm: WHO SHALL REMAIN NAMELESS UNTIL THE END OF TIME
Lord Galadriel: lol
#166566 +(966)- [X]
<twanks> i met this chick at the bar the other day
<twanks> and she was all like "i wanna fuck your brains out" steamy woman...
<twanks> so i was all "hell yeh"
<twanks> so we come back to my place
<twanks> and she jumps on my bed, strips down
<twanks> then she opens her legs wide, begins strokin the ole axe wound
<twanks> and shes moaning and stuff
<twanks> and dude
<twanks> i reckon i coulda had sex
#166572 +(277)- [X]
<mm13> people who eat people
<mm13> are the hungriest people
#166683 +(1331)- [X]
<zP|Russina`cs> the teacher was like justin did you do your homework
<zP|Russina`cs> i was like no forgot to
<zP|Russina`cs> shes like well thats bad news
<zP|Russina`cs> i was like well i got some good news i just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance
#166809 +(950)- [X]
<DigiB0t> Coming Up : ' Linkin Park - Nobody's Listening '! Your current DJ is : MaxxSpawn! We currently have 0 listeners.
#166906 +(617)- [X]
<emlodro> what country is exe
<think> binary islands
#166910 +(819)- [X]
<schnorks> OFFICIAL ATOMIC TIME: 11:41:28PM CDT
<Sigma> OMG schnorks has the A-BOMB
<schnorks> No, the atomic time has nothing to do with weapons of any sort.
<Coco13> schnorks is correct.
<Coco13> The second is based on the wavelength of a particular atom.
<schnorks> What about the first?
<Coco13> You are such a fucking whore.
#166920 +(1382)- [X]
<MightyBlueJustice> I need to jack a hole in this floor so I can get the internet hooked up to the comp in the basement.
<MightyBlueJustice> I need more power tools
<MKDemon> You don't have a drill?
<MightyBlueJustice> We do somewhere.
<MightyBlueJustice> All I can find is a power sander and I just don't have that kind of time.
#166937 +(354)- [X]
DittzieBlondee06: is she a better kisser then me
onkeybutt87: haha, I wish I knew
DittzieBlondee06: i bet ya do
onkeybutt87: I'll just have to use my imagination
DittzieBlondee06: ya will
onkeybutt87: or chloroform
#166952 +(446)- [X]
<RoyCastle> i think my body is compensating for my not eating anything by delving deeper into insanity
<RoyCastle> like earlier I was looking at a picture of a dead cat on the internet and for a moment it made me understand multivariable calculus
<RoyCastle> k.. it was midget pr0n
#166956 +(6055)- [X]
[ron`] Roses are red, violets are blue, I'll fuck you with a rake
#167054 +(832)- [X]
(@[e]space) going to war without France is like going deer hunting without an accordion
#167081 +(315)- [X]
<dekk> your mom lost her virginity in a penis accident
<[b&]shoez> i lost my penis in a virginity accident
#167145 +(245)- [X]
<@maroo> I jumped off a bridge into a river once... they asked me what I was doing... I told them I was LARPing a fish.
#167230 +(1071)- [X]
<Trekkie> this ant has run around 15 times around the screen of my monitor
<IceBerg> kill it with ur mouse
<Trekkie> i tried clicking on him; he wont die
<IceBerg> no you nerd, smash it with your mouse
#167247 +(1276)- [X]
<squid> This spider is such an asshole.
<Sushi-X> y dont u just smash it with impunity?
<squid> It's on the ceiling, and I am not.
<Sushi-X> tell it to come down and fight like a man....or you can climb and fight like a spider
#167361 +(1211)- [X]
<Lachlan> Doogie, what the fuck do you think the emergency generators are there for?
<Sam> Generating Emergencies.
#167435 +(812)- [X]
<despair> I need a nigger HD :(
<despair> omfg... bad ass typo
#167524 +(835)- [X]
<AV-Cables> np: [ - ] [06:05m]
<Frozen-Solid> god DAMN your tags suck av.
<AV-Cables> I know. :D
<AV-Cables> No, I have to re-tag them.
<AV-Cables> I just converted ALL my songs to 192kbps.
<AV-Cables> And the Smashing...LIVE! soundtrack to 320kbps.
<Frozen-Solid> converted from what...?
#167569 +(614)- [X]
<Lointamer> oh crap...kids found my vibrators again
#167574 +(395)- [X]
<kinkos> can you use a tesla coil as a sexual toy?
<Aegis`> yah, but only once.
<kinkos> once is all i need!
#167594 +(685)- [X]
<Ilendil> If two stick people had sex, would it start a fire?
#167698 +(1995)- [X]
<ancho> do girls like it if you stick your hand up there ass??
<ancho> hurry plz.. im in the middle of something
#167731 +(908)- [X]
TrivBaby: QUESTION: 1992 - what did the church of england allow women to become?
#167746 +(345)- [X]
<Mr_Vain> I'd rather have an admirer than a stalker any day
<Phrim> what's the difference, Bonz? :-)
<Mr_Vain> a stalker doesn't blink when they look at you
<Mr_Vain> it's very unnerving
#167799 +(445)- [X]
<Zombie_Punk> You bastards wouldn't know a Clerks reference if it analy raped your mother while pouring sugar in your gastank.
#167825 +(456)- [X]
* ol has joined #mapcore
<Flashdevil> I will rub my sperm in so many places that they won't be able to look at themselves in the mirror without getting pregnant.
<ol> um... did i come in at a bad time?
#167837 +(136)- [X]
<Trife> black kids don't even dress up over here, they just come over and say 'can i have candy'
<sloth> one had a trash bag on
<kokanin> they're dressed as flying eyes and teeth!
<Trife> last year the black kids came back the next day trying to sell me candy
#167844 +(1061)- [X]
<ZS> Ouranophobia- Fear of heaven.
<Kevyn> What's scary about heaven?
<Phantomlord> dude, christians hang out there.
#167863 +(1459)- [X]
<jaymeekae> i feel so american
<Moonman> you shot someone?
#167873 +(401)- [X]
<`Riku> Ok, so there's this UN meeting, and there are a lot of important people in there discussing how to get a peace in Iraq
<`Riku> after the meeting the President of France comes to George Bush and says: "Mr. Bush, there's something I'd like to ask... My son is a huge Star Trek fan, and he'd like to know why there are no Arabians on the show?"
<`Riku> Bush thinks a second, then smirks and says;
<`Riku> "Cause it takes place in the future."
#167874 +(1077)- [X]
<ppolf> I told my brother if you take the cotton wool bit out of a vics inhaler and rubbed it under your eyes, you see in black and white.
<ppolf> He kicked my fucking head in after bawling his eyes out for two hours.
#168090 +(850)- [X]
herblackwings29:: I'm bored
shotgunlo:: me too
shotgunlo:: but I'm also hungry
herblackwings29:: I have tacos
herblackwings29:: they are like cardboard though
shotgunlo:: I would love to eat your taco, Becky
herblackwings29:: I bet
herblackwings29:: my taco doesn't taste like cardboard
shotgunlo:: I love the fact that you know that
#168093 +(23)- [X]
* Now talking in #israel
<Idiot-boy> Hey #israel! Soo... hitler.
#168123 +(512)- [X]
<BeadGrl> just call me Mrs. Robinson
<ZekeMacNeil> Beadgrl likes her men in the same manner that she likes her scotch.
<BeadGrl> aged 18 years in a barrel?
#168191 +(1155)- [X]
<ChaosReactor> RIAA is tricksy try to tricks us.
<ChaosReactor> Try to take away our precious!
#168238 +(162)- [X]
Captain Ferrell: COME JOIN THE WONDERFUL KAZAA COMMUNITY, AND HAVE LOTS OF LEGAL AS HELL FUN
Captain Ferrell: they're not all
Demosthenes: ÜBER-HAXXOR P2P UNDERGROUND PIRACY PROGRAM KAZAA!
Captain Ferrell: exactly
Demosthenes: Wow, that was a lot of adjectives
Captain Ferrell: it sounded like an anime title
#168269 +(24)- [X]
<Arran> brb, loo.
<Stirfry_Ninja> arran is anally retentive
<EvoX> he rents his anus??!!
#168320 +(1150)- [X]
<darko``> Heh, funny how ignore doesn't completely ignores certain nicks/masks. Some kind of messages still pass by.
<Ashe> Guess you have a crappy client
<darko``> Maybe it's just my client though :/
<Ashe> Guess I'm the one ignored
#168702 +(569)- [X]
<wilywampa> dazey said i'm almost out of money and said i need to get a job
<wilywampa> i said i could steal money instead
<wilywampa> and she asked from whom
<wilywampa> i said "from old ladies, i can steal their money and beat them to death"
<wilywampa> and she said "that's awful, why would you do something like that?"
<wilywampa> i said "because babies don't have money"
#168857 +(1128)- [X]
<mojo> I want me a pet monkey.
<Synthetic> My aunt had one, the smell was ungodly. It was allways beating off and if it got scared it would deficate in it's hand a throw it.
<mojo> I know, that's why I want one. If it can beat it's self off then I can teach it how to do it to me.
<Capin> Um... so anyway I went to the zoo this one time and one of the gorillas stole my dad's wallet!
<Synthetic> That was no gorilla, it was a black guy in a fur coat. The son of a bitch has my shoes.
<mojo> I still want a monkey if anybody cares.
#168859 +(5162)- [X]
<FreeFrag> The most secure computer in the world is one not connected to the internet.
<FreeFrag> Thats why I recommend Telstra ADSL.
#168917 +(530)- [X]
Kirby: So like this one time I was fucking this dude in the ass and then I threw up on his back.
ZAn3Yt: I didn't now you were gay Kirby...
katchup: He isn't, that was a shakespeare quote.
#168935 +(498)- [X]
<Dareon> I wonder where my package is.
<Valvados> checked between your legs?
<Dareon> If it was there, I wouldn't be so bored right now, would I?
#169167 +(38)- [X]
Geeky Weezer Fan: Is she still downright refusing head?
onkeybutt87: I haven't really asked her since Saturday
onkeybutt87: but I think so, yeah
Geeky Weezer Fan: Slit her throat.
onkeybutt87: well, I guess that's one way to get it in there...
#169172 +(574)- [X]
« Kil88|Savage » i'm gonna have a polo with my name on it :D
<Bennie> im gonna get some boxers with <dick> on the front
<Bennie> then im gonna get a sock
« Squeeb » lol :)
« Squeeb » ace
<Bennie> with </dick> on
« Squeeb » LMAO
#169607 +(1504)- [X]
(SnapScan): hablais español?
(Picasso-): I would like TWO soft tacos and a large pepsi