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#115836 +(2178)- [X]

* God plays the Sims.
* God clicks on "Gothic" and selects "swear"
<Gothic> Fuck
<Gothic> Wait, what

#115960 +(1370)- [X]

* Dante changes topic to 'ChanServ can go suck a cock.'
* ChanServ changes topic to 'Fuck You'

#115983 +(846)- [X]

<@Rob_Saunders> why do people dislike pop bands?
<+K_Praslowicz> Mecause it is mass-produced crap
<@Rob_Saunders> it's not all crap :(
<+K_Praslowicz> Maybe, But I'm not one to dig through piles of shit to pick out a good piece of corn to eat.

#115997 +(144)- [X]

<virt> i'm a musician. of course i hate HHC. you can't like it unless you are a) a candy raver, b) a candy raver, c) a candyraver, and possibly d) tone deaf and epileptic - and/or german

#116001 +(197)- [X]

<McKree> The hills have eyes...
<Suerte> urinate in them

#116034 +(288)- [X]

* niki-luv waves
* s_ surfs niki

#116079 +(566)- [X]

<^Melchior^> MY NAMES BUSH!... HELP MY FIND IRAQ'S NUCLEAR WEAPONS, ORDER YOUR VERY OWN "FIND MR. SADDAMS WEAPONS OF MASS DESTRUCTION DETECTION KIT", Kit Includes: Darts and a Map

#116082 +(104)- [X]

< Mennonite> hey docfu
< Mennonite> I had a mindblowing last four days
< Mennonite> did you?
< docfu> Menno well, i had  a headblowing in there too
< docfu> to the point where I started to lose oxygen to my brain and become eurphoric...
< TenBaseT> docfu: when that happens it's time to loosen the belt.

#116170 +(860)- [X]

<SUPERHAPPYDUDE> DRUGS ARE BAD
<SUPERHAPPYDUDE> unless you are sick
<SUPERHAPPYDUDE> or depressed
<SUPERHAPPYDUDE> or having trouble sleeping
<SUPERHAPPYDUDE> or when you need to stay awake
<SUPERHAPPYDUDE> or when you need a little inspiration
<SUPERHAPPYDUDE> or when trying to win a sporting event
<SUPERHAPPYDUDE> or when trying to look cool
<SUPERHAPPYDUDE> or when you're just not feeling 100%
<SUPERHAPPYDUDE> but other than that they are BAD

#116361 +(403)- [X]

<ecoli> i remember the girl who lived next to mea
<ecoli> and we saw pictures in my dad's uh. magazines.
<ecoli> "THAT LOOKS LIKE FUN, LET'S TRY THAT."
<ecoli> i think that was also her first golden shower experience, heh.   at that age, i figured that was the only liquid that came out of there.

#116503 +(351)- [X]

<tabooli> A drunken friend recently mispronounced "continental drift," and it came out sounding like "cunnilingual drift." We brainstormed a few meanings for cunnilingual drift before settling on this one: When a person's tongue drifts down to a woman's anus, on purpose or by accident, during an intense session of cunnilingus.

#116511 +(251)- [X]

<Fury> fappathon .. wonder if i can get that registered as a raising money thing
<Fury> "come and compete in this years annual fapathon! Raise money to help the blind!"

#116528 +(942)- [X]

<dw> wtf is bukakke?
<Nightfly> dw: Allow all of us to demonstrate.

#116531 +(7)- [X]

<rg> *me never raped, they always managed a yes before throwing up

#116542 +(295)- [X]

<Repent> I hate it when I'm the only one what chats in the room.  Cause then I'm just hearing myself blabber.
<stugster> we hate it when you chat in the room in general

#116547 +(403)- [X]

<BiZZY> GOD DAMNIT!
<Strom> ?
<BiZZY> only doctor close to me that will check me under title 19 is my ex g/f's mom
<Strom> ...so?
<BiZZY> I know her really well
<BiZZY> kind of odd, I'd be having my groin checked
<Strom> i imagine that would make you more comfortable than having a stranger prod your groin
<BiZZY> no I'd rather have someone I don't know that I won't probly see again do it
<BiZZY> than someone whose daughter used to play with the same area

#116591 +(29)- [X]

<waffy> wtf is this site reyarded
<waffy> rofl
<waffy> how ironic

#116604 +(628)- [X]

<weed> wtf is this world turning to?
<@Phucker> America.

#116662 +(173)- [X]

<fruchtig> Doctors are so evil. They tell you to get in a certain position, hide behind a wall, and let YOU soak up a few x-rays. The doctor thinks, "Just stay there while I go hide behind this wall and press this button for a moment while hysterically laughing at you." And then you see that radioactive symbol on the machine surrounding your head and think, "Oh joy!"

#116706 +(533)- [X]

<Dracon> I saw a mormon crash his bike into a power pole
<Dracon> that was grand :D
<NaKeD> LOL
<html> heHaHehAHehAeh :D
<Dracon> I walked past and said "Not even God saw that one coming... well done tiger!"

#116749 +(576)- [X]

<khanjackalmoreau> i knew a kid who dressed up as a goth leprechaun for halloween
<khanjackalmoreau> all black outfit, with a grayscale rainbow, and a pot full of cure albums

#116774 +(130)- [X]

<AGaeris> And what were you doing? Oh yeah. Cybering.
<AGaeris> CYBERING LIKE RABBITS WITHOUT A CAUSE.

#116839 +(35)- [X]

<Unimita> What wobbles and flies?
<Unimita> A jellycopter
<Unimita> :D

#116869 +(166)- [X]

<padnaebaen> fuck me i love irc
<spanky> yes, its the distilled essence of humanity
<spanky> without the odour

#116902 +(879)- [X]

buservt: I was trying to find a tape downstairs, and I have diarhea, and I had to shit really bad, and I saw a copy of austin powers, and there was a picture of fat bastard on it when he is trying to eat mini me, and I thought (in fat bastards voice) "stay in my butthole" and I laughed so hard I shit all over myself
buservt: another pair of shorts ruined

#116938 +(1479)- [X]

<Nate>  The Americans spent 5 years and 10 million dollars to develope a pen that would write in space, freezing cold, extreme heat, and in zero gravity.
<Nate> The Russians used a pencil

#116969 +(168)- [X]

<crhyme> I made a windchime out of used condoms
<soop> does it go "slap phlap wap"
<soop> in the wind?
<sunrinse> crhyme: sounds more slappy than chimey
<soop> or does it more of an aromatherapy thing
<crhyme> well its mostly just for style
<crhyme> its also a great way to dry out your condoms

#117002 +(9170)- [X]

<YuFFie> SO U HACKING ME THEN HUH
<YuFFie> WElL I GOT NEWS FOR U MISTER I GOT MORE FIREWALL POWERS NOW SO IM SECURE AND IM USING WINDOWS 98 SO IM REALLY SECURE FROM HACKERS LIKE YOU SO YOU BETTA JUST GIVE UP CUZ U GOT NO HOPE MISTER.
* YuFFie (~mirc@3B942731.dsl.stlsmo.swbell.net) Quit (Quit: Owned.)
* YuFFie (~mirc@3B942731.dsl.stlsmo.swbell.net) has joined #
<YuFFie> HELP MY MOUSE IS MOVING BY IT SELF

#117078 +(254)- [X]

* RE_away just taped himself waving a broomstick and changed it into a lightsaber with the help of Video Editing Software
<RE_away> How productive
<RE_away> Now to do the same thing with my penis

#117110 +(907)- [X]

<fade> Dear France,
<fade> Bite Me
<fade> Signed,
<fade> Fade
<Queued> Dear Fade,
<Queued> We surrender
<Queued> Love,
<Queued> France

#117164 +(280)- [X]

<Ariakas> HAHAHA
<Ariakas> Look what happened on my MUD
<Ariakas> SylphW leaps into the Lynx fighting stance.
<Ariakas> MyAss slinks into the Ferret fighting stance.
<Ariakas> SylphW's strike does UNSPEAKABLE THINGS to MyAss!

#117190 +(468)- [X]

<Ariakas> What's white, black, and red all over and has difficulty passing through a revolving door?
<Dolands> A nun with a spear through her head!

#117206 +(280)- [X]

jason: i used to always get free pizza hut for reading books and shit :o/
jason: my family depended on my book reading to provide dinner

#117217 +(626)- [X]

<Da_Wrecka> The guns cost 10. Considering the guns can be used in other games too that's not bad at all.
<SLowry05> yeah wtf is that thing in front of hte numbers
<Da_Wrecka> And it's still cheap.
<Da_Wrecka> It's called a "pound sign"
<SLowry05> oh you're chinese?

#117299 +(394)- [X]

<poppycat> well..I dont have a vibrator any more but yes...he was called mister buzzy and he used to squirm and vibrate across the floor at great speed
<kirsy> you let your vibrator play on the floor?
<poppycat> yes..I didnt get much out of using it so I decided to let it amuse me by racing it
<Yasui> "GO MR BUZZY! beat that other vibrator! you can do it!"

#117305 +(569)- [X]

<Legion> touching yourself leeds to blindness
<beej> heh, and spellin problems, apparently
<beej> ...omfg

#117330 +(513)- [X]

<The_Kirbinator> 3000 mexicans dies yesterday........ 5 car pile-up on the I-10

#117337 +(279)- [X]

<FireEgl> so hurngy =(
<tito> why don't you eat your dick?
<tito> heh
<FireEgl> I need something more filling.

#117351 +(278)- [X]

<@Shively> my last college had a guy who was smearing feces on the bathroom walls
<+PickleHead> ewww
<@Shively> yea well the guy at our college was becomming so popular that the student goverment put an article out on him
<+PickleHead> have you seen the book called Brown spots on the walls by "hooflung pooh"?
<+PickleHead> :P
<@Shively> he said he would stop if he could have a spot for somehting he wanted to say
<@Shively> so they gave it to him and he defended it as an art form
<+PickleHead> LMAO
<+PickleHead> you can't be serious
<@Shively> saying that feces drawn on walls is an expression of fecal art
<@Shively> so
<+PickleHead> ......................................
<+PickleHead> fecal... art....
<@Shively> the janitors responded with their own article

#117577 +(868)- [X]

<Eyal> i've been having a dilemma
<Eyal> what are better to play with
<Eyal> boobs or balls?
<Fidel-> boobs
<hex-> boobs
<Eyal> i mean, when they're yours
<Fidel-> balls
<hex-> balls

#117663 +(488)- [X]

*** Antiarc is now known as Antiarrrrrrc
<Bloody_Davy_Flint> How's it going Antiarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrc?
<Antiarrrrrrc> Arr, there be a steering wheel in me crotch!
<screevo> Doesnt that hurt?
<Antiarrrrrrc> Aye! It's drivin' me nuts!

#117673 +(373)- [X]

<jgannon> Quicktime 0wnz... if you have a Mac. :-)
<PatrickD> so where can I go to download a Mac? ;-)
<jgannon> PatrickD: www.goatse.cx
<jgannon> Wow... I haven't said THAT in a long time.
<PatrickD> somehow that version of the Mac never worked well for me
<jgannon> Yeah... too many wide open ports.

#117674 +(262)- [X]

<The_Defiance> who cares... i mean really, illiterate people on a text based chat program would be almost as bizarre as a blind optician
<My3blka> Def, it's commonplace, it's called AOL

#117682 +(229)- [X]

<Terra> there i was at a donkey stall, there was a sign there saying in english : would u like to ride on your own ass?
<Terra> so i was like ??
<UPC_Nemo> Like?
<UPC_Nemo> Did you ride the badass assride?
<zuhrich_> lol

#117687 +(476)- [X]

<assturbation> this nick doesnt exactly scream "heterosexual"

#117691 +(439)- [X]

<Ali_> no canadian cars eh?
<Egg_> no
<Egg_> i don't think there's a canadian made car
<Egg_> lol
<Egg_> that would be cool if there was
<Egg_> we'd have shitty animal names though
<Egg_> like the Ford Canadian Goose
<Egg_> or the Chevy Beaver
<Egg_> man
<Egg_> i'd so drive a Chevy Beaver

#117696 +(411)- [X]

<ToiletDuc> I remember when I first came to the realization that I was a geek.... I came home from working on a router lab all day at school, picked up the phone, and dialed the IP address for Router C

#117698 +(21)- [X]

<AnaloG-KiD|EatingIsDope> icy has a personality?
<Prince_C> yeah its called a down syndrome

#117711 +(788)- [X]

<@|KFG|Candle[DDD]> im from uganda
<@cylyk> interesting
<@cylyk> i'm canadian!
<@|KFG|Candle[DDD]> actually im not from uganda
<@|KFG|Candle[DDD]> where is canada?
<@swolf> its an american expansion pack

#117732 +(728)- [X]

<bfdd> i heard the mcdonalds commerical say special sauce
<bfdd> and i thought "ill give em some special sauce"
<kcl822> heh
<bfdd> and then i realized
<bfdd> i was talking dirty to a tv commerical
<bfdd> and felt ashamed of myself


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