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#71791 +(284)- [X]

(Craig): watching something on suicide bombers on discovery
(doggie^): lol
(doggie^): wonder how they managed that
(doggie^): not many people to interview or anything

#71797 +(204)- [X]

<Tarkaan> Gerbil, I've spent the past three months and about $10,000 preparing for this fucking war
<Tarkaan> although the majority of that was buying property in Canada
<Tarkaan> But I also got a camp stove

#71815 +(171)- [X]

<kichigai> *:-}8 8-   transvestite

#71819 +(170)- [X]

<_Obi-Wan_> so what should we discuss?
<Liquid> ....hmm....Ebonics!
<_Obi-Wan_> ebonics?
<Andy_Hock> The disease?

#71820 +(463)- [X]

(m-femme): my ass is too big for hotpants haha
(m-femme): its my muscle...i have too much ass muscle..
(m-femme): haha
(doggie^): lol
([olly]): stop using it to talk then

#71847 +(222)- [X]

<Cold_n_Alone> oh yea.. remember that one pretty girl i said i was talking to in emails and staring at in class?  i asked her about masterbation habits and.. she isnt talking to me anymore  :/

#71853 +(295)- [X]

<ZiR0> damn
<ZiR0> whenever i clean my glasses, my monitor becomes dirty as hell

#71857 +(17)- [X]

<@trizzo:#nanog> if you cant knock the bottom out, knock the fuck out of the sides

#71885 +(266)- [X]

<Dramon_Killer> i watch gay porn
<Dramon_Killer> err
<Dramon_Killer> i meant to say im secure in my sexuality
<Dramon_Killer> like, secure enough to watch it, masturbate and still like chicks

#71888 +(211)- [X]

* Apollo- pokes IceKarma
* IceKarma pokes Apollo- back
* Apollo- i spoked
<Apollo-> s/i/is/
<Apollo-> s/spoked/poked/
<Apollo-> s/Apollo- i spoked/Apollo is drunk/

#71890 +(401)- [X]

<Trax> Raider are you on LSD?
<Raider> ehh, no Im on DSL

#71892 +(180)- [X]

<kuribo> i guess if i spent less time deathmatching i'd have a woman
<kuribo> but deathmatching is free
<kuribo> fragging > sex
<WildPegasus> Fragging is kind of like sex. If you do them right, goo goes everywhere.
<kuribo> pretty much, peg... and just like sex, after you're done fragging, you can just leave the server if you want, or stick around for another round

#71893 +(411)- [X]

<chuffy> this is fucked
<chuffy> i left my blinds open
<chuffy> and i woke up
<chuffy> and im sunburnt

#71896 +(346)- [X]

<SirLudicrus> What are those hats that have beer can mounts on each side called?
<Kurin> Stupid

#71897 +(332)- [X]

* iMac therefore iSuck *

#71904 +(291)- [X]

<un0> i want them to commit seppuku when they lose on iron chef

#71913 +(99)- [X]

<Assid> ack
<Assid> something not right here
<Assid>  1:58am  up 1 day, 19:16,  2 users,  load average: 149.20, 123.73, 57.51

#71922 +(169)- [X]

<fallenMeSsIAH> damn cops, they piss me off, SHE Wanted to have sex infront of the police station not me, i am an unwilling participant, charge her for rape if it will get me out of a indecent exposure charge
<BenZor> fallenMeSsIAH: you got laid... consider it a miracle

#71944 +(561)- [X]

<+|neo|> FUCK!!!!!!!!!
<+|neo|> fucking donut
<+|neo|> this is gay
<+|neo|> i bit my lip while eating this donut
<+|neo|> hurt like a bitch
<+|neo|> bout 5 secs later i bit it in the same place again
<+|neo|> then it started bleeding
<@Decco> lol
<+|neo|> then about 20 secs ago i bit the same part again
<sic6sic> neo....dont move
<sic6sic> just....dont move

#71946 +(197)- [X]

<z8ball> ive been sitting here for 30 mins trying to get ppp going in fbsd
<z8ball> just realised i only have 1 phone line
<z8ball> and im using it

#71953 +(1042)- [X]

<@Mike> OMG
<@Mike> I just got a security alert
<@Mike> MY COMPUTER IS BROADCASTING AN IP ADDRESS!!!!!!!
<@Mike> OMFG
<@Mike> what do I do?????????
* @Mike clicks the helpful lil message
<@Mike> oooh look. A purple monkey wants to sell me a firewall

#71954 +(822)- [X]

<jim_trim> How To Know If a girl likes you
<jim_trim> ?
<sarah> Quite simple: If she sits naked on your hand, and it feels like a horse is eating out of your palm, she likes you.

#71964 +(603)- [X]

liz: you know if love was measured in kb's ...it would take HOURS for me to upload my love for you.
mikey: *taps your forehead* that's because of your small upstream bandwidth dear.
mikey: <3
liz: hahahhahahhahahhaha
liz: god i love it when you talk dorky to me
mikey: also, i seem to be dropping syn packets.
mikey: i suspect a collision somewhere on your train of thought.
liz: ping www.loveformikey.com
mikey: host not found :-(

#71969 +(13)- [X]

[ @K` ] rac00n: remember the whole noah and the arc story ?
[ @rac00n ] u mean the one where they couldnt fit my beast inside the arc?
[ @K` ] no i mean the one where they had to build an arc because my bukakke covered the earth for like 40 days and 40 nights

#71975 +(1372)- [X]

<Raven> spread the word of jesus my brother
<Jonesy> j----e---s----u---s

#71979 +(627)- [X]

<Knives> YOUR RADIO IS BROKEN
<Knives> I DEMAND A REFUCK
<Knives> .
<Knives> REFUND

#71981 +(33)- [X]

<Tommy^> anybody know if u can download win98 second edition for free if you allready own 98
<Tommy^> cant seem to find it on microsoft site

#71983 +(1250)- [X]

<keevs> umm from IRC or IRL?
<Doomers> What program is IRL?
<Mal> my god

#71989 +(196)- [X]

<REIDZY> why the fuck is everyone tryign to tlak all fuckign smart

#71995 +(1200)- [X]

<Dezmo> man, a coworker of mine had a blind date, so I offered to call him right after he met her so if she was ugly he could act like some emergency had come up and had to go
<Dezmo> so I call, and she answers the phone "is this the emergency phone call in case I'm a skank?"

#71996 +(374)- [X]

[Tom] That was unexpected
[Tom] I was playing with my pen
[Tom] And it just exploded
[ReDeeMeR] Quite the contrary; usually if you 'play' with your 'pen' enough, it will 'explode'

#71997 +(235)- [X]

<Slicer> Its funny how the thought of sucking on a wet sock makes me feel sick to my stomach
<Slicer> and the thought of sucking on a dick, disturbingly enough, doesn't.
<Red> ...

#72014 +(247)- [X]

<urandom> hrm...do you have kids?
<RangerRick> nope
<urandom> route add -host 192.168.0.5 gw 127.0.0.1 <--- It's comes to this, the only way I can get them to do their chores

#72043 +(117)- [X]

<CyniKaL> id pretend I was gay to be the fluffer for a porn movie...
<Kohn|watching|eating> Fluffer: person that sucks the cocks when they go limp during a porn movie

#72058 +(1938)- [X]

<JakBauer> oh thats right, we could only use 8 char nicks on efnet.
<CactusJac> 9 chars
<kuribo> cactus...
<kuribo> you're on altnet now
<kuribo> JUST ADD THE FREAKING K
<CactusJac> no
<kuribo> ADD IT
<CactusJac> OK
*** CactusJac is now known as CacktusJac

#72070 +(358)- [X]

<Lincoln`s_Wax> Liberal Arts Quantum Physics: Light's damned fast and not everything is as it seems. Space is funny like that. The end.

#72076 +(377)- [X]

<Aiwa> I might be writing an editorial about the state of NASCAR and what led to Dale Earnhardt's death...
<Graphic_V> I'm guessing the wall.

#72079 +(331)- [X]

<markogogo> :(
<markogogo> I try and try and try....
<markogogo> ... and nothing comes out of it.
<Yellow-Snow> try using the other hand mark

#72083 +(492)- [X]

<homework> oh god.. i just hit ctrl+s after putting down my pencil

#72089 +(1422)- [X]

<trollusk_zzz> ha ha slip
<trollusk_zzz> i have two quotes on bash and what do you have? a hot girlfriend and a promising sports career! SUCKER

#72095 +(207)- [X]

<@nuclear_> anyone know about a/c systems in cars?
<@lucidguy> they blow.

#72117 +(52)- [X]

<citizenh8> bubb rubb jacked my GC game
<citizenh8> its been held up in Oakland for 4 days now

#72122 +(1320)- [X]

<StreaK> fuck im in a lot of channels
* Volt|Sleep does a whois a StreaK
<Volt|Sleep> StreaK is on #3drealms @#incest_r_us @#animalphilia @#fecalphilia @#luvn_lambs_rule @#mom-fuck-movies #disney_pics
<StreaK> WTF
<StreaK> i thought i had ops in disney_pics

#72130 +(612)- [X]

<KKK> hey guys check this out, i can say all the banned words, and not get banned, look
<KKK> FUCK YOU MYDOWNLOADER KAZZA XDCCSPY CRITEN INSIDERZ
* dv sets mode: +b *!*@52DF899E39.addictz.net
* KKK was kicked by dv (banned: Repeated Offence, No Caps! 5min ban)

#72150 +(524)- [X]

<+an_ass733> Hey guys I have someting interesing to tell
<+an_ass733> I went to a chinese restaurant for lunch today
<+an_ass733> The fortune cookie said "A successful life comes from a life of virtue and hard work."
<+an_ass733> On the back were the lottery numbers.

#72159 +(199)- [X]

* H0merTax (~FathrBake@ool-4355ba4b.dyn.optonline.net) has joined
<H0merTax> hello, does anyone know what it means when it says "need correct key to join a channel"?
<@Opeeo> to fix it type /quit special key
*** H0merTax has left IRC (special key)

* H0merTax (~FathrBake@ool-4355ba4b.dyn.optonline.net) has joined
<H0merTax> hey i tried that and it kicked me off? id really appriciater help
<@Opeeo> try /quit special key 2
<H0merTax> where dop i type ot in... the window that says where i connect?
<@Opeeo> yeah bro
<H0merTax> thanx
*** H0merTax has left IRC (special key 2)

* Opeeo sets mode: +b *!*@ool-4355ba4b.dyn.optonline.net

#72160 +(299)- [X]

<Smmenen> Rakso, as a law student, how can it possibly help you to be so exaggerating
<Tristal> Do you even know what lawyers DO?

#72162 +(206)- [X]

<@Jaxxin> your momma's so fat, I want to have sex with her and not tell anyone else :(

#72175 +(569)- [X]

<DCGrendel> i spent 8hrs today doing evil code to do evil things i dont really understand
<ragnarok2040> you work for microsoft?

#72181 +(816)- [X]

<Null> hittman
<Hittman> hi Null
<Null> you are a load that should have been swallowed ;/
<rb_> 20 bucks says he doesnt get it
<Null> i see your 20 and raise you 20
<Hittman> load
<Hittman> ?
<rb_> YES!!!
<rb_> I WIN


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