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#55365 +(413)- [X]

<daenonok> not unless you wanna get rodney king'd
<daenonok> nerd style
<R4g3^o^M4g3> I've seen it before.
<R4g3^o^M4g3> Plastic keyboard wrist-rests and optical mice...it ain't pretty.
<R4g3^o^M4g3> According to the police report "Six geeks who wish to remain unnamed mauled a defenseless jock in a birrage of girly punches and kicks, while repeating a (believed to be satanic) chant; '0wn3d d00d!"

#55372 +(253)- [X]

<AnTrAaXx> wb Dark
<Dark|Lord> wow.. I've been disconnected for 9 hours, and you've been here long enough to gimme wb? :)

#55380 +(646)- [X]

<Xerox> ...Oh god. Nintendo gave me a preview DVD of apparently quite a lot of their games. I have no DVD player. I do, however, have a PS2. CAN ANYONE SEE THE IRONY HERE!?

#55417 +(22)- [X]

<Jiggs> Can anyone tell me the correct syntax for using "!list" for getting the server info?

#55438 +(499)- [X]

<Guest> how big is the internet?
<xmaddness> Well if you go too far you'll fall off the end of it.
<Guest> really?
<xmaddness> Yep, some people call it IRC

#55443 +(147)- [X]

<APE_> warezing is like wanking, everyone does it but u dont talk about it

#55453 +(192)- [X]

<N1k1tA> i can blow a perfect 2600hz pitch with my ass
<Nab> heh
<N1k1tA> the goatse man is not gay, he is a phreaker

#55456 +(67)- [X]

<Maddie46> Abs I have tried warez and its confusing
<dotcomlarry> yeah, version 1.0 was hard.

#55463 +(346)- [X]

<sean> wow
<sean> that fart was gross
<sean> sounded like an elephant got shot

#55468 +(171)- [X]

* DRagon87 flips quarter
<DRagon87> heads
<Squirl> is heads the bottom?

#55481 +(156)- [X]

lope767: watch out man
lope767: she'll eat u hole
lope767: err
lope767: whole
FKing Windows: I was sort of hoping for both.

#55495 +(1805)- [X]

<zealous> I was walking to the mobil gas station this morning to get my ride to work as I do every morning (weekdays anyway) when I decided that instead of walking the long way around I would just jump the little wall (about 3 feet high) and get there quicker, well when I went to jump the wall I started off with my left foot instead of my right like I usually do and I didn't bring my foot up quick enough thus catching the wall and sending me face first
<zealous> into the ground but somehow I managed to do some wild ninja tuck and roll things ending up on my feet and staring at some guy who was quite bugged eyed so I just raised my arms in a "v" and yelled hazah at the top of my lungs

#55500 +(107)- [X]

<Ken> Massages are pretty healthy for you.
<Ken> It's a form of preventive medicine
<KageGamer> what about the massages that like the little japanese girl walks on your back
<KageGamer> what if she has long nails on her toes
<KageGamer> wouldnt that hurt?
DannoHung> In mother russia, YOU walk on little Japanese girl!

#55503 +(194)- [X]

<gofer-chan> ...Exo, can I still keep my channel? Or is that like impersonating you or something?
<gofer-chan> Because if you want, I'll change the name.
<Exophase> gofer; You can keep the channel :p
<gofer-chan> Yay!
<Exophase> gofer; It's not impersonating me to have a channel called "#exophase", because no one is gonna walk into the channel and go "gasp, I'm sitting inside Exophase!"

#55512 +(537)- [X]

<Oriden> you have lens crafters in canada?
<EV3> yup yup
<Gregg|WaitingForUO> no
<Gregg|WaitingForUO> we just leave our visually impaired to die.
<Gregg|WaitingForUO> get hit by cars and stuff

#55514 +(170)- [X]

<bbraun> do you think that when thoreau urged us to simplify our lives, he meant going to serial terminals?

#55524 +(458)- [X]

<pairo> you know you're doomed when you have to whois your domain registrar ID to find out your own phone number

#55559 +(646)- [X]

[Video`] The future of tech support isn't changing at all.
[Video`] I was in this class of tech support people.
[Video`] I took a screenshot of the desktop
[Video`] Made it the background
[Video`] And moved all the icons
[Video`] And they were confused as hell :

#55564 +(209)- [X]

(During another round of mega splits on DALnet)
<Guest51394> how do u get into the servers?
<priz> you can't.
<priz> if you walked into a McDonalds when the kitchen was on fire, do you think they'd take your order?

#55565 +(1101)- [X]

<Rav3n> my gf is only 2 years old and my parents are fuming.
<Rav3n> older

#55566 +(587)- [X]

Session Start: Thu Dec 12 21:34:30 2002
<burzzzzzz> 23:56:55
<burzzzzzz> 3 more mins !! :D
<cystum> till what?
<burzzzzzz> i can drive on my own
<burzzzzzz> 00:00:01
<burzzzzzz> !!!!
<milolilo> you're free!
<burzzzzzz> <-- officialy a driver !! :D

Session Start: Sat Dec 14 19:38:29 2002
<burzzzzzz> i had a little disagreement with cement pilar while looking for a place to park my car :/

#55567 +(217)- [X]

<Perma> The first time you ever meet a chick, you have to slap her, just back hand the girl as hard as you can, like that, you'll never worry about that chick telling you "You never treat me the was you used too".
<Perma> Got that?
<rob> what if she likes getting smacked around
<Perma> Even better

#55568 +(617)- [X]

<vocalizedWHORE> mmm, c++
<vocalizedWHORE> do.this();
<vocalizedWHORE> do.that();
<vocalizedWHORE> if (error)
<vocalizedWHORE> blame(microsoft);

#55569 +(181)- [X]

<thezinner> I've yet to find a women with the right MD5sum :)

#55570 +(202)- [X]

<LLyric> How do I break out of an infinite loop on a c64? It's been sooo long.
<MaggieL> Unplug it.

#55571 +(1695)- [X]

<Pepe> there are 2 kids in the fourth grade, one white and one black, which one has the bigger dick
<L@cky> the black one
<Pepe> why?
<L@cky> cuz hes black dipshit
<Pepe> no fuckface, the nigger's 25!
<Nostradom> Dude, stop making fun of black people.
<Nostradom> Seriously, I used to have a really good black friend.
<L@cky> used to?
<Nostradom> money was short...we had to sell him

#55572 +(278)- [X]

<Kasugai> matthias_: You could get a job at Google telling their tech dept. what they are doing wrong!
<matthias_> for one they still haven't got a mind-reader interface going
<Kasugai> I hear they are still trying to implement safe search filtering on that one
<Kasugai> Otherwise you get pr0n popping up every 8 seconds.

#55573 +(112)- [X]

<merle> damn it, i cant figure out what is taking up so much room on my hdd
<scott-> probably gay porn you renamed and hid a long time ago

#55590 +(142)- [X]

[+Sirex]: ...busy moving from gentoo to debian :)
[{Ogre}Si|verwire]: gentoo, debian? eh? where do u live then

#55591 +(275)- [X]

[+Sirex]: ...busy moving from gentoo to debian :)
[Si|verwire]: gentoo, debian? eh? where do u live then

#55592 +(15)- [X]

<@freshmint> [22:44] Amber: but shooosh I didnt tell u that
<@freshmint> [22:44] Amber: hehe ok?
<@freshmint> oops.
<Spudsta> this, coming from the chick with a metaphorical cock

#55593 +(-21)- [X]

<IAmKingBrad> you know, having an opera singer rape you is much like eating a biscuit, except with eating a biscuit you do not have a cock in your ass unless you live at my uncle's house and am my cousin HAHA

#55594 +(204)- [X]

<Jeeeeebus> eg: I was in a doorway with my arm across it resting .. and he walks thru and goes "minimize, please" without even thinking bout it..
<RnRcneHHlt> hahahahahahahahahahaha
<Jeeeeebus> I wish I could do that..

#55599 +(265)- [X]

<freshbob> man, this banana is huge
<freshbob> i don't think bananas this big are natural
<freshbob> they must be genetically engineered or something
<manna> dude, it's not natural, but you have to give your ass a chance to relax

#55602 +(22)- [X]

<Morstis> The oath of celibacy in the church only means the priest can secretly sodomize young boys instead of having open intercourse with women.

#55608 +(12)- [X]

[BR00D] haha i gave up on irc, and came back just to harass you :D

#55614 +(370)- [X]

<SonicBlues> man, don't shove vibrators up your ass if your a guy man. I was trying to milk my prostate y'know, damnit, I guess the vibrator was too much for me.
<SonicBlues> get this, i slide the dildo up my but, smothered with ky jelly yeah? I flip it on, and I start stroking.
<DrQ> this cant end up well....
<SonicBlues> now, i'm in front of a TV, about 3.5 meters away from me, compensate about .25 meters for the diagonal. But man, i start strokng, and maybe 8 minutes later, i get this surging pain from my nuts and i shoot the silver bullet all the way to the tv man. christ.
<DrQ> conrgatulations
<Thrifty> Hahahahah holy shit man
<SonicBlues> yeah, the problem is, I came onto irc to tell you all, my girlfriend stepped in...

#55615 +(-90)- [X]

<Ultra_Violet> Xero: I want to fuck your lesbian grand-mother with a dirty wooden spoon

#55621 +(217)- [X]

<Sentenced4Life> Im from ohio..w00t w00r
<int0x6h> that would explain the handle right?

#55626 +(439)- [X]

<[Ars]Michael> is there any way to make a noise when u get a pm
<[Ars]Mikoyan> you could grunt in pleasure

#55651 +(10)- [X]

<Renegade|> ops please
<Renegade|> why won't the bots remember that i have ops
<MatzeRX> u like keep changing ur IP or summit ?
<Renegade|> no
<MatzeRX> cable or dial up?
<Renegade|> dial up

#55653 +(246)- [X]

<Boned> ever watched scrambled porn only to learn 5 mins later that its two guys?

#55664 +(189)- [X]

<Andaru> I don't have any porno
<Andaru> I don't particularly like porno either
<LuCiPh33R> you're on the internet and you don't like porn?

#55718 +(228)- [X]

<woops> people without porn invent stuff like computers or solve world hunger

#55721 +(26)- [X]

<Anthony> identical twins?
<sHyGuY> tis true.
<Kagome> we're faternal
<Kagome> thank GOD
<Anthony> FATernal?

#55774 +(38)- [X]

* ZoMbIeGuY has joined #finalfight
<Xerox> It's a zombie! Aim for the head, guys!
<ZoMbIeGuY> =(
* ToastyGhost knocks ZoMbIeGuY unconscious
<Nimduin> ...Wow, he's either AzN or StUpId.
<ToastyGhost> Just an AOL'r
<ZoMbIeGuY> Uhh... I'm outter here.
<ZoMbIeGuY> goodbye.
* ToastyGhost cheers
<Nimduin> That, or he's Fake President Deling.
<TedAran> Ha
* ZoMbIeGuY has quit IRC (Quit: )

#55775 +(253)- [X]

Iride4mosh no doing gay stuff while im gone ya hear
polkaisrad dont wanna miss out huh?
Iride4mosh shut up man...

#55776 +(-320)- [X]

<hobojackson> i was walking around and saw a car going really fast
<hobojackson> SO I SAID WOW THAT CAR MUST HAVE 1024 MB OF DDR SD RAM AND A 256 MEG VIDEO CARD AND A 3 GIGAHERTZ HARD DRIVE AHAHHA AH AHAA AHAHAHHA
<spongebob> OMG YOU CONFUSED COMPUTERS WITH REAL LIFE
<spongebob> THATS THE FUNNIEST THING I EVER HEARd!!!!!!!!!

#55777 +(279)- [X]

<Crack[H]eaD> That brings up an interesting point.... According to the license agreement of some software you dont own it... you are merely renting it
<Crack[H]eaD> so by downloading the software am I borrowing it?
<Lasuuco> yeah crack
<Lasuuco> hence the term
<Lasuuco> "licensed"
<Crack[H]eaD> I should make a bunch of bumper stickers that say "Borrowing is not a crime" ;)
<bigfoot> could i borrow one?
<Crack[H]eaD> Fuck yeah

#55782 +(155)- [X]

<Vulpes> I know somewhere out there is a man or woman willing to have sex with me while I remain on IRC.


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