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#51179 +(270)- [X]

<roOt-dIR> where can i get a free shopping cart?
<roOt-dIR> ?
<collapser> supermarket, then run away quickly

#51189 +(165)- [X]

<exx> they're horrible drivers as is, lets not make them kamikaze's
<exx> I bet the jap fighter pilots were trying to land on those ships..

#51196 +(1020)- [X]

* Idiot has quit IRC
<ChineseElite`> that'll be the day...

#51199 +(390)- [X]

<+WAREZmunkey> owwww shit
<+WAREZmunkey> i just managed to put a staple into my tongue
<+WAREZmunkey> teach me to chew on it i suppose
<graeme> I cannot even begin to imagine the sequence of steps that caused to to accidentally staple your tongue.
<+WAREZmunkey> ok i will rephrase it
<+WAREZmunkey> i just stupidly put a staple into my tongue
<Lithium> LOL

#51200 +(103)- [X]

* I^Need^A^GirL^IN^MY^LifE was kicked by CityWoman (banned: Try a date service.)

#51204 +(-87)- [X]

<Autumnn> Yo mama so stupid she took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept.

#51214 +(246)- [X]

<special-k> woohoo sodomy law changed
<`rush> FUCK YEAH

#51226 +(180)- [X]

* Kristoph is a 16 year old trance / hard house DJ from sheffield, anyone wanna pretend to be a girl and talk about masturbation?

#51231 +(468)- [X]

<UberDuper> I need an optical mouse.
<UberDuper> My balls keep getting all crusty.

#51232 +(208)- [X]

(ManiPan84) so what are you doing?
(OoO0O0Oo0o) taking pieces of conversations and manipulating them to suit my sadistic needs

#51234 +(427)- [X]

*** Martin has joined #Lostones
<Martin> word
<roy> indeed
<roy> but the question is
<roy> WHICH word?
<roy> her word?
<roy> My word?
<roy> HIS WORD?
<roy> it all depends...
<roy> on whose word.
*** Martin has quit IRC

#51237 +(397)- [X]

<+[SFX]Newbie0> I had a dog once
<+[SFX]Newbie0> my mom always told me when I got a boo-boo, to let the dog lick it
<+[SFX]Newbie0> said it was antiseptic
<+[SFX]Newbie0> One time, I had a sore throat
<@[EoK]cheaptrick> I can see where this is going..
<+[SFX]Newbie0> God I miss that dog
<@[EoK]cheaptrick> ew..
<+|WM|ePi> haha

#51239 +(395)- [X]

<Jahidi> love is just when two people decide to stalk each other.

#51240 +(282)- [X]

*** ChanServ (ChanServ@Services.EnterTheGame.Com) Quit (Aussie-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com Ky-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com)
*** BuM (~bum@ool-18bf3781.dyn.optonline.net) Quit (Aussie-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com Ky-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com)
*** igl|Quew{nBw} (~Quew@d150-29-112.home.cgocable.net) Quit (Aussie-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com Ky-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com)
*** deftik (~deftik@ptd-24-194-205-26.maine.rr.com) Quit (Aussie-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com Ky-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com)
<}{^{end}`sk00l> Netsplit Detected Ky-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com from: Aussie-Hub.EnterTheGame.Com
<Nemephosis> thanks for telling us after the fact
<Nemephosis> isn't that like getting hit by a car then having someone say "dude there's a car coming"

#51256 +(173)- [X]

<@Toys> i got allways with wings in the mail today
<@Toys> it comes with dry weave, and wings, and optional fuckign sunroof <@Toys> i tried one on and i didn't feel CONFIDENT
<@Toys> i felt WORRIED as fuck
<@Toys> i'm using them for coffee filters now

#51313 +(470)- [X]

<upper-> it fears change
<upper-> just like grandmas that refuse to use microwave ovens
<vlMbh> my grandmother used to warm up her microwave oven!
<vlMbh> i went over for dinner one day and she turned it on for 4 mins on
high
<vlMbh> with nothing in it
<vlMbh> i was like.. uhh what ARE you doing
<vlMbh> " warming it up "

#51330 +(474)- [X]

<vrit> mm* = hi, we're capcom. we don't need to come up with new ideas for games. here, enjoy street fighter vs marvel vs snk vs megaman vs taliban vs n'sync alpha super gold turbo extreme zero mega ultra double-stuf supreme extra value combo 4x

#51331 +(393)- [X]

(@virt) cracker barrel is the most hilarious name for a place where a bunch of white people go

#51344 +(878)- [X]

-->  ( join )  josiejaz (~jimmie@hide-53860.dial.tor1.sprint-canada.net) joined (#linux).
( josiejaz )  fucking god damn peice of s**t ISP
( Eric )  i love how you cencored "shit"
( Eric )  but forgot fucking and damn

#51356 +(-209)- [X]

Now talking in #blackpower.
* ChanServ changes topic to 'NEW YORK (CNN) -- Jam Master Jay, the DJ of the longtime rap group Run-DMC, was shot in the head and killed Wednesday night in a Queens recording studio, according to New York police. Jay is one dead nigger. One less aids infected, syphallitic, dreadlocked nigger in the world!'

#51363 +(190)- [X]

<Sloan|Eat> Aquaman's ancient nemesis is Captain Highliner.
<Goonigoogoo> Aquaman's ancient nemesis is sand

#51372 +(184)- [X]

<ragnarok2040> @_@, i have a mouse scratching directly above my head
<Uzzab0x> trailer mice O_o
* _absent 0_o CKY - Shock and Terror [3:07]
<ragnarok2040> :/ and i can't beat on the ceiling cuz it messes up the ceiling fan
<ragnarok2040> so i have to ignore it
<Uzzab0x> I pity j00 rag :D
<_absent> haha your trailer is infested with canadians
<_absent> *mice

#51382 +(645)- [X]

*  magicsmoke  returns with a mug of coffee that is still almost black after adding milk
kiri : lol
kiri : that's some heavey coffee then
magicsmoke : i could say that the spoon is standing up in it..
magicsmoke : but i can't see the spoon. i think it's dissolved
Alpha1 : There is no spoon

#51393 +(366)- [X]

<essex-> man that was no fart
<essex-> brbrb

#51403 +(300)- [X]

<ChineseElite> there is nothing wrong with using linux..
<Threeboy> if that's the lifestyle you wanna live, i wont judge you.
<Threeboy> i just wont support you at the parades.

#51418 +(190)- [X]

<NyseriA> i think i should inform you that i am totally naked at the keyboard.....and i just sat on a box of screws :(((((((((((((
<Weebl> is your webcam on nys?

#51424 +(178)- [X]

<mikaru> cumshots are amusing.
<autistk> bukkake isn't however.. it's just odd
<autistk> fuckin japanese have to always take a decent idea and then totally fuck it up
<mikaru> scary part with jap porn is the girls are yelping and yet the guys arent exactly well endowed, almost as though it's a porno and not real, but i refuse to belief that.
<autistk> they probably put wasabi on them or something
<mikaru> ahahah

#51425 +(27)- [X]

<mikaru> thinkgeek.com has some l33t a55 tshirts.
<mikaru> literally/
<autistk> mikaru: dude, I think you'll find they are, in fact, g3y455 shirts

#51432 +(75)- [X]

Kaji: "i think willingly putting your child in a porno comes under the catergory of unfit parent"
Jallil d'lil 'anonen: depends on the kind of porno...if it were snuff yeah, but the real classy kind is okay
Kaji: ...mmk
Jallil d'lil 'anonen: pretend I didn't say that
Kaji, Maelthra D' Llaren: i will..

#51436 +(315)- [X]

<@i386> NEXT Year, me, skool. pointelss educational films. susicide
<BenZor> Dude
<BenZor> if you spell like that, it isnt pointless.

#51463 +(269)- [X]

<chadamir> I was gonna call my band 'trebek is god' but we decided that was a better album name and then we decided not to use it at all
<kolby> and then you realized there was no band
<kolby> it was just you and a karaoke machine

#51467 +(27)- [X]

<Champion> id never admit to being homosexual

#51496 +(639)- [X]

<webby_g[work]> some guy just forgot his login and NEEDED to print out some work, so I let him login into my account and print it off, aren't I NICE?
<Zarei> no now all your bases will belong to him
<webby_g[work]> he was supervised, so if he did try to me up me the bomb, he would have had no chance to survive make his time.

#51498 +(490)- [X]

<meyowith> almost done cleaning my room :D
<meyowith> now to untangle my wires..
Quit: Meyowith (connection reset by peer)

#51517 +(202)- [X]

<Khey> There was this soap opera on the TV in the customer lounge at work and there were these black people on it
<Khey> And I thought to myself
<Khey> "Man, why don't they get 'real' black people in soap operas?"
<duffey> Haha
<Khey> I'm not talking about some upper-middle class light-skinned 'nigga' either.
<Khey> Some dark-skinned, thugg'd out, bling-blingin', grill'd up guy.
<Khey> With cornrows and a stocking cap
<Khey> I'd watch soap opera's then.
<Khey> "Oh no, Johnny's mom was kidnapped"
<Khey> "AW SHIT NIGGA I'S FUNNA CAP ME SOME CRACKAS"
<Khey> or something
<Khey> Anyways, enough of Stereotype Theatre with Mr.K

#51519 +(890)- [X]

* Feren considers quitting his job and starting a small ISP in the yukon by strapping wireless access points to grizzly bears.
<JenWolf> That seems only slightly less dangerous than you current job.
<Feren> I suppose.
* JenWolf can imagine the help desk calls you'd get. "Help, my access point ate my little brother."

#51528 +(238)- [X]

<Karp> Who am I to judge myself?

#51537 +(234)- [X]

<eqnox> I need ddr to unlease my full power
<kingBooze> ddr?
<eqnox> dance dance revolution
<kingBooze> I've never played
<kingBooze> is it as fun as everyone says it is?
<bennid> no
<bennid> just gay
<DSmooth> kingBooze: ddr is for ghetto kids
<DSmooth> at the arcade
<DSmooth> and their white trash girlfirends watch them play
<DSmooth> until they've had enough
<DSmooth> then they take them home and beat them

#51551 +(285)- [X]

* Joins: rock (rock@cs24243145-246.houston.rr.com)
<rock> hey
<Capn_Panic> hey
<Shockster> hey
<Capn_Panic> it's fat albert!

#51590 +(247)- [X]

<DA_BUTCHER> Annie will you marry me?
<DA_BUTCHER> I don't care what gender you are!
<|Annie|> shizz
<DA_BUTCHER> I'm Greek
<|Annie|> that's like the 6th time someone's asked me that in here
<|Annie|> I'll get back to you k ._.
<Scotch> It's your own fault for making your gender so obvious in your nick
<DA_BUTCHER> yes but the others would freak out if you turned out to be a 30 year old wrestler named Bernard

#51597 +(189)- [X]

<b1u3^t3rr0r> bash.org; yet more proof there are people more fucked up than me.

#51612 +(186)- [X]

<DrZaius44> pc load letter? What the fuck is PC load letter??
<CharCoal69> a letter that says "I shot my load. Sorry. -- Your Computer"

#51615 +(439)- [X]

<TunkeyMicket> HOLY SHIT MY COMPUTER IS BROADCASTING AN IP ADDRESS
<TunkeyMicket> HOW DO I MAKE IT STOP
<TunkeyMicket> THIS WINDOW CAME UP
<TunkeyMicket> TOLD ME THAT IT WAS DANGEROUS

#51616 +(58)- [X]

<CharCoal69> and I made 2 dollars selling cigarettes to children in third world countries. I told them it was food.

#51623 +(1190)- [X]

<EmpressMay> When I was 5, I was in Radio Shack's battery club.
<RegEdit> The first rule about battery club is you do not talk about battery club.

#51627 +(179)- [X]

<DracoDanMP> i spent all day reading on www.bash.org
<@MalHavoc> and that is why you fail.
<DracoDanMP> then i realized that only a true geek would even get 99% of the jokes, much less think they were funny
<@MalHavoc> I bet you laughed your ass off all fucking day :P

#51637 +(21)- [X]

<Tiberiumsun01> I am so lonely, I wish a girl would look at me <maq> maybe you should wait around in parking lots at night until one comes by and stuff her in a potato sack

#51641 +(248)- [X]

denisbaldwin: I think I love you...
denisbaldwin: So what am I so afraid of...
denisbaldwin: I'm afraid that I'm not sure of...
denisbaldwin: A love there is no cure for.
alexusslave: like herpes?

#51669 +(2019)- [X]

<BlackHawk> LULU: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got no titties
<LULU> You wear pants don't you?

#51716 +(225)- [X]

<@pork> whats best buy
<@Al> pork: it's a store, they're kind of like the trading posts you have in australia only with carpet and fewer cured crocodile hides.


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