#46310 +(724)- [X]
<decifer> you should've seen the chicks clawing each other at the beach to get to me when they heard about my 231day uptime
#46313 +(405)- [X]
Rangsk: I'm watching a movie and I hit some key by accident... dunno which
Rangsk: and all the sudden something seems... not right
Rangsk: after about a minute I realize that the sound is going 2x as fast but the video is still going 1x
Rangsk: and I'm like... wtf... why would someone program that as a FEATURE?
#46315 +(30)- [X]
<@chucky> . <= a map of the world zoomed out alot
#46316 +(223)- [X]
<ryda> earlier, i was lookin up doom 3 stuff
<ryda> and i clicked on this doom 3 screenshot link
<ryda> and it redirected to a pornsite
<ryda> and then my mum comes up to me and offers me a pringle
<ryda> and im just like sheeet
<milenko what did she say?
<ryda> i couldnt get it off the screen
<ryda> she pretended not to noticed
<ryda> alt f4 wasnt workin lol
<ryda> thing is, it looked really really gross
<milenko> what was it, cumshot?
<ryda> im not sure
<ryda> but i think it could have been tranny
<milenko> dude, YOUR FUCKED
#46324 +(636)- [X]
<w|zzy> had to help sister in the shower
<w|zzy> as in she couldn't get it hot enouguh
#46327 +(195)- [X]
<Diablo-D3> RichiH: only you would have a chainsaw strapon.
<RichiH> yeah, this completely redefines "treehugger"
#46338 +(338)- [X]
<Kai-jin> violence is always an answer
<Kai-jin> yes it is..it may not the *the* answer...but it is always *an* answer
<Aan|trigu> well so is bestiality
#46347 +(361)- [X]
(+_Penguin) ican typw qirh my wywa ckoswd
#46375 +(155)- [X]
<flawed> they got a weight loss patch now
<flawed> if you're a sexually active fat chick who also smokes, you could be wearing three patches.. one for weight loss, one for birth control and one for quitting smoking
<NuFrost> patent the multipatch(tm)
#46386 +(398)- [X]
<FeSTeR> oh ya great job pullin out of the parking lot today..lol almost hit a woman
<GABAR> dude if i was any good at pulling out, you wouldnt be alive
#46391 +(233)- [X]
<Eticam> there's a hole in my pants, right at my asshole
<Eticam> how the hell did that get there? :/
#46396 +(399)- [X]
«+ aisu_kurimu » damn right
«+ aisu_kurimu » wait i think i messed up my ghetto lang
«+ aisu_kurimu » damn straight*
«+ aisu_kurimu » ughhhh 17 years in the ghetto, you'd think i'd pick up something
«@Xellos-san» yeah, herpes
#46411 +(49)- [X]
<Guyp> like a week ago this indian
<Guyp> interviewed my english teacher
<Guyp> and he didnt know english
<Guyp> so he said
<Guyp> excuse me, my english bad, because class is boring and when teacher are teaching i smoke out class
<Guyp> it was so funny
#46420 +(283)- [X]
<Angelz> cya bskfdhdt
<Hoopy> can I buy a vowel? :/
#46421 +(660)- [X]
<gbp> er det noen som har Silence Of The Lambs
<dortch> i have silence of the lambs
<dortch> but i dont know what the fuck you just said
#46424 +(260)- [X]
<ef~ian_> I saw a hot chick working at Radio Shack once. I think it was a mistake.
#46427 +(441)- [X]
<crushdmb> I HATE EXES
* crushdmb kills all exes
<crushdmb> 'cuz my ex is an asshole
<vap0r> i thought you meant .exe
#46431 +(151)- [X]
* Admiral_Justin shoves vex into /dev/null
* Vex Quit (Connection reset by peer)
#46445 +(329)- [X]
* DocHopper is now known as DocRestarting
* DocRestarting has quit IRC (Quit: )
<Sean> that was so pointless
#46449 +(114)- [X]
<generic> but ive decided to switch this lappy to mandrake instead of linux
#46461 +(20)- [X]
<miv> final meals of people who are on death row
<miv> "Justice, Equality, World Peace"
<miv> what kind of request is that
<miv> U CANT EAT THAT! moron
<miv> if it was me i would have asked for a 6 year old japanese girl
<miv> i'd eat her out
#46471 +(555)- [X]
<stern_7> on CNN, story number 1: North Korea has a nuke.
<stern_7> story number 2: Does standing on your head cure hiccuphs?
<stern_7> This is what happens when AOL is allowed to own the news.
#46472 +(183)- [X]
<magusXXX> I think it's funny that roxio wants to buy napster.
<magusXXX> "You steal it, we'll burn it!"
#46475 +(127)- [X]
<fahd> stop making fun of my religion. islam isn't funyn, it's serious
<fahd> now shutup, i have to study for calculus
<Hat> Fahd, is Allah good at calculus?
<Hat> Yeah, I guess not. He's only good at bomb mak.... I mean chemistry.
#46485 +(15)- [X]
<Tibor-> grr. . .I don't have adobe, though, and I don't know what the hell "vector" is, nor does it outline the process of "converting" it :(
<Darth-Phenom> Tib, by Adobe do you mean Photoshop?
<Tibor-> Yea, probably, Phen. It just says Adobe Illustrator and such
#46496 +(360)- [X]
<nirosys> whoever decided it'd be a good idea to rar an iso up, then throw it in a tar... then gzip it...
<nirosys> should be shot..
#46498 +(178)- [X]
<World_Corrupt> I once knew this guy who was 45 and we were good friends. and i was 11 then
<ascian> you didn't meet him in a bathroom, did you?
#46504 +(402)- [X]
<Grumman> man, tough week for my fantasy hockey team
<JustNoodle> any luck with your fantasy sex life?
#46517 +(329)- [X]
<+The_Steel> I scored a 96% on the procrastination test
<+The_Steel> I'm not suprised
<+emul8or_> i put off the procrastination test till tomorrow
#46526 +(43)- [X]
<MistaED|CrazyTaxi> Crazy_Taxi.Deviance.ShareReactor.bin.exe, it doesn't bloody work
<[whee]Kris|bah> .......you don't run the file, ed
#46541 +(792)- [X]
* Sep mst find a working free ISP for gods sack
<BlazeHedgehogAdvance> God's Sack? Isn't that..
#46550 +(1375)- [X]
<BlazeHedgehog> Cripes. ANYTHING is innuendo nowadays
<BlazeHedgehog> "I had a glass of milk." "WHOA GOOD JOB, HOW WAS SHE?"
<BlazeHedgehog> "No. I mean, I poured milk into a glass and drank it." "You sure did!"
#46552 +(111)- [X]
<Wheeze> "yo baby...we all urinate...wanna do it?"
<BIGmog|site> wanna urinate?! that's your pick up line?
<BIGmog|site> you need to put something in between then
<BIGmog|site> otherwise you're gonna get pee'd on
#46559 +(611)- [X]
*** Ugly_Stick is now known as Bueghty_Stick
*** Bueghty_Stick is now known as Buehty_Stick
*** Buehty_Stick is now known as Buhty_Stick
*** Buhty_Stick is now known as Beuhty_Stick
*** Beuhty_Stick is now known as Beugty_Stick
<Beugty_Stick> how the hell do you spell beughty!
#46565 +(198)- [X]
<Scott> i dunno, Bill Gates porn would get sooo many hits
<Scott> they'd wanna see how micro and soft he really is
#46581 +(223)- [X]
ComNerd1: would you have sex with anybody?
Auto response from KarpenkoSoup: No women, no kids
ComNerd1: oh, ok
KarpenkoSoup: Yeah, those are the rules.
#46589 +(26)- [X]
<Killrbyte> I hate faggots. They stole our word.
<Killrbyte> Gay used to mean you were happy. Now it means you have a sore ass.
#46593 +(376)- [X]
<kmad> ppl should stop using worn-out cliches because they're not funny anymore
<}}T-DuB--> is that your final answer?
#46598 +(924)- [X]
<Guest17888> its me Where can i mk trilogy doiwnload???
<Garret> Just go here.
<Guest17888> garret its true or false
<Garret> It's true.
<Garret> I'm getting it at 400KB/s!
<Guest17888> garret its not true
<Garret> You clicked the link?
<Guest17888> yes garret and.....
<Garret> You do realize you just searched fbi.gov for warez, porn, sodomy, illegal, microsoft, and mortal kombat right?
<Guest17888> fuck ya all
* Quits: Guest17888 (MKIRCNfirstname.lastname@example.org.Kg9=) (QUIT: User exited)
#46608 +(-11)- [X]
<AlBo^StUd> i have a virus i fink
<AlBo^StUd> like wen im on the net
<AlBo^StUd> my mouse goes nuts
<AlBo^StUd> n cliks everywere
<AlBo^StUd> n wen i move it it makes it worse
<AlBo^StUd> d only way i kan get it off is by d/c my mouse n reconecting it
<My`Albanian`Ass> u running windows 98?
#46610 +(26)- [X]
(&) rak (email@example.com) is trying to send you Gayness.exe(20 kb) on port 3283.
#46611 +(-9)- [X]
* Anaconda doesnt feel to well :\
< josie> whyyyy?
<@Anaconda> stomach virus going around down here atm
<@Anaconda> think if got it
<@Anaconda> was painting the toilet bowl last night.. if u get what I mean
#46619 +(285)- [X]
<cin> i have friends in my bum
<cin> My mum says they're worms
<cin> But I know better
#46621 +(434)- [X]
<|MonK|> I have a 16X dvd rom drive, so why dose it still take an hour and a half to watch a whole DVD?
#46630 +(207)- [X]
<_Godless_> what can say to the ex that killed a part of you that you'll never get back ... with out souding bitter?
#46632 +(236)- [X]
<flook> bugger, I accidentally printed a page of all black and now I have no ink left :-/
<Steve_Cajun> flook> practising your goth poetry then? :)
#46634 +(235)- [X]
<Kobe> I just got an sms before.... " This message cost 22 cents. This could feed a muslim boy in afganistan for a whole day. Send this to 7 of your friends and starve the c**t for a week "
#46635 +(403)- [X]
<-- Matias has quit (Exit: Some people are like Slinkies . . . not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs)
#46637 +(244)- [X]
<SLURPee> i remember in yr 9 i questioned something
<SLURPee> ohh about genesis and the order in which it occured
<SLURPee> her response was
<SLURPee> 'as catholics we don't question. we just accept'
#46640 +(93)- [X]
<Udeth> i fucking HATE counterstrike-players
<Udeth> i hope they all die.