#34720 +(557)- [X]
<abs> my mom fell down the stairs
#34741 +(131)- [X]
<Nyphur> Everything I say is a lie.
<Nyphur> I AM COMPULSIVE LIAR!
<CWGerard> Oh no, what to believe!!!
<CWGerard> I ARE BORK! DOWNLOAD TEH PATCH!
#34744 +(-35)- [X]
[18:06] * @N4m3k ponders on that..I'll take note of it..and see which topic comes out better.
<+Zer0-kewl> "It smells like ass in here...but yet i stay and carry on with my lurking and writing"
<+Zer0-kewl> but that only works if it smells like ass in your room.
<@N4m3k> my room doesn't smell like ass :-
<@N4m3k> I hope that doesn't make it to bash :-
#34746 +(200)- [X]
<Mank> I missed about half of the movie
<Mank> If you catch my drift
<waffle> Mank: stop with the public masterbastion
#34748 +(225)- [X]
<Watermelon> so many fruits...kiwi, peaches, banana
<Watermelon> and me!
<Watermelon> we almost have a salad
#34755 +(-137)- [X]
<Ac3-Drakenon> when i was with pure at the laser tag place there were some asians and i yelled
<Ac3-Drakenon> "I LIKE FLIED LICE"
<mr`bob> and then they kicked ur ass?
<Ac3-Drakenon> lol no, they were lil fat asians
<Ac3-Drakenon> i step on them and get blubber on my shoe
#34759 +(162)- [X]
<AlmanzoW> Oh please. Being in a car with Zot is like being strapped to your best friend's dad while he gets hard looking at Playboy
#34760 +(673)- [X]
<Koyama> that masturbation thread has gotten way out of hand
#34768 +(233)- [X]
<Shadye> reboot: gibb0r us pic of your wife
<reboot> if I ever find one, I'll scan it
<ArtecMice> drug her and scan her face
<reboot> there's an idea, and I could get sex at the same time
#34769 +(216)- [X]
<MindRape> don't mind me, i'm divorced =)
<MindRape> still going thru the damn thing
<MindRape> she's sueing me for my penis
<Deeply> suing you for your penis?
<MindRape> yea, its bigger than hers :>
#34771 +(151)- [X]
<DakotaKid> MultiAGP: Bend over, I got all the ram you need.
#34772 +(995)- [X]
<Waxahachi> No. I am a programmer & I want friends that I can identify with intellectually and personably.
<BoDePlOt> if i eat anutter peanut butter cup i think i am going to puke
#34773 +(339)- [X]
<Mxeil> You have a g/f right
<DakotaKid> Mxeil: No.
<Mxeil> DK: How can I guy as intellectual as you not have a girl!
<DakotaKid> Mxeil: Maybe because I have a boyfriend.
<Mxeil> DK: Your a girl?
<DakotaKid> Mxeil: Listen numbnut... I'm male. I have a boyfriend. Do I need to spell it out any clearer?
<Wrexen> dk I think you need to explain the whole 'plumbing' of having a boyfriend instead of a girlfriend
#34775 +(424)- [X]
*** Mandingo (Glow35@ts1p7.candw.ag) has joined #visualbasic
<Mandingo> hi any females here?
<LameLLama> subtle, real subtle
#34776 +(1516)- [X]
<www666> this is so cool I'm typing with Dragon NaturallySpeaking in mIrc
<www666> no more typing
<LameLLama> www: try "thlash exit"
*** www666 has quit IRC (Leaving)
*** www666 (firstname.lastname@example.org) has joined #visualbasic
<www666> Hugh Masters
<www666> you basterdes
#34782 +(582)- [X]
* Ozak-shower hugs everyone
* Solinus runs from ozak
<Ozak-shower> oh shit
* Ozak-shower is now known as Ozak-Clothed
#34811 +(136)- [X]
<angelB> drinking 2L of pepsi blue will FUCK YOU UP
<angelB> and not in any positive way
<angelB> it's like feeling sick after drinkin too much alc
<angelB> without the benefits of being drunk/not remembering it
#34856 +(172)- [X]
<Mek> my dad gets junkmail from all over the world
<Mek> hes had em from, belgium, france, austria, australia, Canada, America, Argentina, Russia and the Czech Republic
<Mek> and also Jamaica
<Paulio> its his mailorder bride catalogues
<Mek> you get them too??
#34862 +(143)- [X]
<TigerSun> check this out people, I saw someone's greet line on a bot today that
says "In God We Trust, everyone else get yourself an X.500 certificate"
#34891 +(-450)- [X]
<Raenne> .. I'M ON BASH.ORG?!?!?
#34898 +(1432)- [X]
<Spyro> The other day, I was smoking some weed and got into the car to go and drop my sister off to the bus stop. I thought some prick stole my steering wheel....
<Spyro> But I was in the backseat
#34912 +(197)- [X]
<TigerSun> AsiaDoll: the only reason I'm not rich yet is because I refuse to earn on others' stupidity
<TigerSun> I believe stupidity should kill, not help others to get richer
<TigerSun> I'm highly ethical!
#34916 +(444)- [X]
<blitzoid> I just now realized what Token's name meant on South Park
<blitzoid> "Token... he's black. OOOOOHHH I GET IT. HAHAHAHAHAH THAT'S FUNNY. I'm stupid."
<blitzoid> Man... I feel like that one kid who got into pogs late, bought like 800 of them, and then people stopped playing a couple days later.
#34918 +(1135)- [X]
<HandyMan> i didnt set tahat
#34919 +(95)- [X]
<ex-machina> aha! I just switched the britney case for the cracked alanis case! The angry canadian strikes again!
#34925 +(187)- [X]
<Roundhouse> Where can I get Java Virtual Machine? Microsoft is being bitches and I can no longer download it from their upgrade. Is there any place where I can get this at?
<Maniacal> sun just might have a website
#34930 +(243)- [X]
<@natclass> I smoke just so I can hang out with hot chicks
<@natclass> You don't actually have to smoke, just light up a butt and hold it
<@natclass> occasionally take a little puff
<@d13> i do lines so i can hang out with old hookers
#34945 +(74)- [X]
<freak> so whats the present? is it something with sailing?!
<mango> it has to do with my mouth though
<freak> like kissing?
<mango> ha ha
<mango> try me giving u head
<mango> hell yea
<freak> better take out your microscope, cause remember im asian =)
#34951 +(174)- [X]
<Ud|AFK> red your so foreign it's amazing
<]KO[-RedWolf-|2-4|4-> k whats a foreign?
#34966 +(279)- [X]
<Sede> That's a big word.. does it mean 'blowjob'?
<Potato> I thought that was "affection".
<Nyphur> Affection, Blowjob, same thing, isn't it?
<Potato> That's how I was raised.
#34969 +(307)- [X]
<D4NG3R0U5> i swear to god my college is selling personal info to bookies or somethen
<D4NG3R0U5> "Do you plan on living in the residence you've written above, for at least a year 1=yes 2=no |__|"
<R4V3N0U5 1> every college asks that
<D4NG3R0U5> "Would you say you're a fan of college sports, and are responsible when it comes to making bets 1=yes 2=no |__|"
<D4NG3R0U5> "Do you have a domestic animal that could be killed if you were to fail to pay a dept 1=yes 2=no |__|
#34970 +(318)- [X]
<Ed> P2 Celeron was good though, because it used the same slot as the P3.
<Mime> P3 has two different slots!
<Mime> I had a SNES game style P3, my mate had a flat one.
<Ed> Mime, that's a socket.
<waffle> Mime: you mean a slot and socket
<Mime> Yes, socket and slot.
<waffle> amd really loved the slot
<kawaii_kekekeke> I love that slot.
<Mime> I love your mom's slot
<waffle> your moms a slot
#34972 +(1049)- [X]
<tak>: wanna play a game?
<krplunkr: like what
<tak> Pearl Harbor
<krplunkr> sounsd fun
<krplunkr> how do i play?
<tak> I lay there, and you blow the hell out of me
<krplunkr> im confused
#34973 +(344)- [X]
<Nikari[away]> OMG I GOT NEW SHOES
<Nikari[away]> YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS
<Nikari[away]> TIME FOR DDR
#34974 +(1329)- [X]
<Kitty> h1 u wnat 2 d8?
<tavaryn> no nall, you're too l8
<Kitty> but it is r f8
<tavaryn> maybe you should w8
<tavaryn> because we just can't rel8
<Kitty> but we r old enuf 2 m8
<tavaryn> you can't put food on my pl8
<Kitty> but when im with u i feel gr8
<Kitty> i thought we were going fishing i already bought the b8
<tavaryn> maybe i should give you another chance with a clean sl8
#34992 +(53)- [X]
*** weedsmokingpylon has quit IRC (Killed (stats.dal.net (User has been banned from DALnet ([exp/os] Due to abuse from this host, you are no longer welcome on DALnet. See http://kline.dal.net/exploits/akills.htm#os for more information.) [AKILL ID:1032824129K-e])))
*** ChRiS^HoWiE^GoNe is now known as ChRiS^HoWiE
<BurningDog> dalnet 1 , weed 0
#35019 +(-14)- [X]
<Elm> please dont link to that site
<Minion> Why not
<Elm> some of the stuff on it is not really appropriate
<Minion> On bash.org??
<Minion> It's all text, bleh
<Brianthe> alot of the quotes are pretty r-rated
#35030 +(610)- [X]
<Incubus> wanking in the shower has a drawback, now the rain makes me horny
#35080 +(620)- [X]
* KeeperX is currently listening to [Your Mom and Dad - 'Having Sex' (0min 12secs long)]
#35163 +(235)- [X]
[+escobar] just found out my grandma watches porn
[+escobar] something is serious wrong in the world
#35178 +(224)- [X]
<@Deosyne> Yeah. I'm not admitting to anyone, especially my kid, that I stuck a vacuum in my ass
#35212 +(36)- [X]
< BD-Calvin> an iso in 10 minutes. vr00m
< SnowKrash> =)
< NeilOfDoom> BD-Calvin :: yeah, go easy on the kazaa pr0n
#35279 +(121)- [X]
<Upth> AvatarADV: Having scripts is an advantage over having to do it by ear.
<AvatarADV> Yeah, in the same way as having your -wife- gang-raped is an advantage because you don't have to impregnate her yourself, I guess...
#35287 +(0)- [X]
<PeteParker> Microsoft Bob is the default shell for Windows 2000.
#35307 +(236)- [X]
<Night> bitches fall for everything.
<CptPlanet> i know. dumb sluts.
<Night> it's genetic that they are cuter and stupider.
<CptPlanet> yeah. it's because cute smart chicks don't like to fuck, and dumb ugly chicks don't get hit on.
<CptPlanet> natural selection.
#35316 +(130)- [X]
<h3123t1c> we at IRC protection use AOL often
<h3123t1c> it more organized
<_Godless_> Of course, because .5k/s, constant drop-offs and and $24 for a sub$10 service is "organized"
#35331 +(415)- [X]
<boxed> "duh, do they have their own dollars in europe? I was to canada once, and they had their own dollars! can you believe that?"
<boxed> note that that's an actual quote from some people my dad met in the US once
#35339 +(289)- [X]
<kuruption> OMG I HATE LINUX USERS
<kuruption> this guys gave me a shell on his box
<kuruption> and vi is symlinked to pico!
#35342 +(481)- [X]
<Kaladam> I just heard somebody scream "WHAT THE FUCK" down the hall from me
<Kaladam> some dudes roommate jizzed on his face
#35358 +(203)- [X]
<DogWelder> Hrmmm... Norton says that I've contracted a virus, and should disable needle sharing. Is this bad?