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#33617 +(367)- [X]

<miteymous> whats crackin?
<Ize> a cracker
<miteymous> you rode the short bus didn't you Ize?
<Ize> to where

#33618 +(76)- [X]

* zztzed wonders why there are closed captions in cell phone commercials.
<Inuchance> zed: Well, some of them DO have text messaging now. =P

#33619 +(466)- [X]

<NeonDawn> Does anyone know if there exists some irc-script (bX or egg) that lets other users open a shell through dcc?
<cwd> NeonDawn: i think you're looking for GetOwned v1.3
<NeonDawn> cwd: thanks, i'll try it

#33623 +(719)- [X]

<Carp_AFK> i planned to dye my hair this weekend
<Carp_AFK> till i was told i was supposed to put vaseline all round my forehead, and wear gloves
<Carp_AFK> and theres no way im going to a shop buying some rubber gloves and a tub of vaseline

#33624 +(149)- [X]

<Fat-Burrick> icq is a sentient being that wants to take over the world by pissing me off

#33627 +(556)- [X]

<+k\o\w> for some reason, ever since I was a young kid I wanted to hatch an egg
<+k\o\w> I would steal them from the fridge
<+k\o\w> and put them under my ass for hours
<+k\o\w> but they never hatched
<+k\o\w> and I would cry

#33629 +(-27)- [X]

<birdnest> only thing wrong ith canada is they are communists

#33630 +(18)- [X]

<xbconnect> anyone alive?
<PoohBear> just.. just go shoot yourself kthnx
*** xbconnect (jirc@GSCCC-162169ED.brick101.nj.comcast.net) Quit (Quit: Leaving)

#33636 +(23)- [X]

<Doys`> cats r mean
<Doys`> they can take ur leg off
<^badboy^> lol
<Doys`> i got attacked by one the other day
<Face> u must know some big cats (or u have small legs)

#33637 +(149)- [X]

<Bomberman> yay. it's rotten.com  the site that continues to single handedly destroy my faith in humanity

#33638 +(143)- [X]

( @drdink ) philb: I bought an IRC server on ebay today
( @drdink ) philb: it is going to cost like $100 to ship it
( philb ) drdink, do you have the crane ready to lower it into position?
( @drdink ) it has wheels
( philb ) ahh, that's not so bad then. What will they think of next? I suppose the new 0.9 micron technology has allowed miniaturisation...
( Vulcan ) You really are stupid arent you?

#33639 +(122)- [X]

<Bifter> not all black ppl are criminals like me

#33641 +(156)- [X]

<evLvsJim> scientest jed wants to battle 
<evLvsJim> what scientist is called jed?

#33643 +(243)- [X]

<jw> is that a cucumber or are you just happy to see shaggy-h and me?
<shaggy-h> jw: it's a cucumber. But you gotta wonder what he's going to do with it

#33646 +(114)- [X]

<@PkLvKimZz> Remember to wash: Colon, socks, tshirts

#33647 +(42)- [X]

<EVHAPPY> SOYLENT GREEN IS FAT CHICKS!!!

#33649 +(378)- [X]

<Captain_Cobungo> Arr.  We have a Pirate Ship now.
<FirstMateScurvy> Yes captain. But we have no cannons.
<Captain_Cobungo> Arr! We need to loot something in order to get money for cannons.
<Captain_Cobungo> Arr! All hands on deck!  Prepare to loot and plunder.... Canada!
* FirstMateScurvy puts his hands on the deck
<FirstMateScurvy> What now cap'n?
<Captain_Cobungo> Not like that ya lilly livered land-lubber!
<Captain_Cobungo> We're gonna invade canada! Arr! Attack!
* Captain_Cobungo and his forces loot and plunder Canada.  Arr.
<Cow> Umm... Captain Cobungo, how did you loot and plunder canada with no weapons?
<Captain_Cobungo> What makes you think Canada has weapons? Arr.

#33652 +(10)- [X]

<@Pooka> I READ YOU CAN GET GONERELA FROM IT

#33653 +(365)- [X]

<Marecki> Ahh. Sorry. Thought you made "sickening" as in "making you want to puke"
<Dr_Octogon> lol
<noid|drunk> Well, it does make you want to puke.
<noid|drunk> And cry, and laugh.
<noid|drunk> And shit.
<Dr_Octogon> and shit?
<noid|drunk> And shit = and stuff
<noid|drunk> Not "HUUUUUUUUUUHNNNNNNNNGH"

#33659 +(497)- [X]

<Mr_Saturn> im surprised you won the race with 3 million other sperm
<VenDi> i never raced in anythin dumbass

#33661 +(317)- [X]

<\Gadget\> I have cable and my mom just handed me an AOL CD to see if we could get the internet to go faster.

#33662 +(123)- [X]

<Toen> I'm downloading a movie called anal training! :o
* Etir recommends...
<Etir> ...'cancel'

#33663 +(48)- [X]

<Zel> why do we put up with these nitwits?
<t0ad> because i'm never around to ban them

#33664 +(385)- [X]

<ultraman_jlh> Gonna go eat guys.
<ultraman_jlh> Later.
<Fnord> Why are you eating guys?
<ultraman_jlh> Because I don't like bitchy food.

#33667 +(96)- [X]

<RichiH> then how did you find out?
<RichiH> i have ignored all ctcps
<aboman> Dazman found out utilizing his investigative skillz
<RichiH> anal probing?
<Dazman> WTF are you on about
<RichiH> no, i would of noticed

#33674 +(55)- [X]

<azzkickr> <enntee> man
<azzkickr> <enntee> i think my fucking cat is pregneant
<azzkickr> <angry> dude
<azzkickr> <angry> you should have used protection.
<azzkickr> LMAO...
<azzkickr> sounds like something id do...

#33675 +(349)- [X]

* Tony has joined #hate
* Joe_ sets mode: +b *!*othic_Fae@a72555a5.tnt1.conway.sc.da.140562b5.net.hmsk
* Tony was kicked by Joe_ (Joe_)
* Tony has joined #hate
<Joe_> Hello, Tony. How are you today?
<Joe_> Tony? WHERE ARE YOU TONY?
* Tony was kicked by Joe_ (OH NO HE IS DEAD)
* Joe_ has quit IRC (Local kill by Tony (I only like nice people to use my server.  Find another one.))

#33677 +(29)- [X]

Warman89: It's the best game evr.
Meamperson: Which one?
Warman89: Warcraft u idiot!
Meamperson: For the end world spell, press Ctrl+Alt+Delete twice.

#33678 +(126)- [X]

<+Link-> <skitzm> i have a serious prob with my quake 3 please helP!
<+Link-> why do people instintively pm me for help on q3?
<+Link-> i have a serious problem with my q3 as well
<+Link-> it sucks.

#33681 +(218)- [X]

RaspberryClock:  The Goatse man would make a great golf caddy, don't you think?

#33682 +(410)- [X]

+ GearSlayr and my cat shits on the floor now too cause she's getting old
+ GearSlayr if its not near a litter box it just shits. it did it on the stairs once and i slipped on it and almost broke my neck
+ GearSlayr i'd love to kill that cat myself.
+ GearSlayr fuck it, it'll have depends on or something
+ GearSlayr thats what i'll do
+ GearSlayr i'll tie a diaper to my cats ass
+ GearSlayr or a bag or something
+ GearSlayr can you picture that?
+ GearSlayr that would be the most pathetic thing ever
+ NathanRomulus your cat will sit and tear it off
+ GearSlayr yeah probably
+ NathanRomulus and then proceed to crap on your floor
+ GearSlayr seriously though that cat needs to be put down
+ GearSlayr its like 17 years old
syrup6 wow
syrup6 old as fart
+ GearSlayr and damn... you'd think my dog could just drag its ass outside after it takes a shit... BUT NOOOOO
+ GearSlayr i know just what my dog thinks... "how can i piss him off... i know.. i'll drag my ass right next to his computer so he HAS to clean up the skid mark!"
+ GearSlayr longest skid mark that dog ever made was 12 feet... it was so amazing i had to measure it
+ GearSlayr i should've taken pictures
+ GearSlayr it was fucking hilarious

#33684 +(40)- [X]

*** Sharyna (sharyna_t@BV1-24.217.72.16.charter-stl.com) Quit (herring.sandwich.net tempura.sandwich.net)
*** Sharyna (sharyna_t@BV1-24.217.72.16.charter-stl.com) has joined #improfanfic
<Sharyna> Tempura ate *me*!  ;-;

#33685 +(10)- [X]

<Fashnek> I'm bi
* Fashnek chokes on his rubber dinner
<Fashnek> that sounds so wrong
<twitchi> LMAO!!!

#33686 +(602)- [X]

<General-Sauron> There was actually something good about Napster, when you got a song, it was actually a song, instead of going on p2p's, downloading an MP3, and it ends up being some dog fucking a woman
<General-Sauron> I mean, I still won, but what if it had been something sick...

#33687 +(337)- [X]

<tamasutra> someone earlier today thought i was 16
<_Mage_> Is that insulting or a compliment?
<tamasutra> nah, i take it as a compliment
<tamasutra> i don't mind looking young at all
<tamasutra> especially given the business i'm in
<_Mage_> er...

#33688 +(35)- [X]

<acidkick> the kids at my school are so gay
<Spitz[busy]> you should feel at home then

#33690 +(229)- [X]

<TheDingo> OH SHIT.. i was supposed to read the communist manifesto for political science..
<Novasol> just read a Windows manual. same thing

#33691 +(315)- [X]

(/query)
<ThaMax> Do you want to marry me?
<Cheetara> Who are you ?
<ThaMax> Sorry, you helped me out on #linux once.

#33693 +(315)- [X]

<fstorm> i'd wonder if bill gates can win the presidency, with all his money and such
<Cybe> NOOOOO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!
<Cybe> dude.....the government would crash and have to be rebooted like 6 times a day
<Cybe> not to mention all the security issues

#33696 +(614)- [X]

<TreeSurgeon>  My lesbian friend Paula once told me that if god didn't intend for it to be eaten, he wouldn't have made it look like a taco. I rest my case.

#33697 +(1356)- [X]

<houzit> What were you doing?
<psmylie> Watchin a movie
<houzit> which movie?
<psmylie> The One with Jet Li
<houzit> Yeah, but which one? He's in lots of movies
<psmylie> If you go Abbott & Costello on me I'll drive to your house and beat you severely.

#33701 +(94)- [X]

<@Evil_Ed> lets see...blowjob, or ircd.
<@Evil_Ed> hm.
<@Dianora> ircd sure is tough, lets go shopping!

#33702 +(1788)- [X]

<BlackHawk> LULU: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got
nothing to put in it.
<LULU> You wear pants don't you?

#33705 +(557)- [X]

<@drauh> nothing a small dose of real live cara won't help
<@caraliss> why, you presumptive malaysian particle smasher!
<@drauh> you can smash my particles any time
<@drauh> conjugate my verbs
<@drauh> fsck my hard drive
< AgtDaleCo> dangle your participle?
< curvygurl> parse your sentences
<@drauh> integrate me by parts
<@caraliss> hee
<@drauh> fuck me in the ass
<@drauh> oh, wait

#33706 +(301)- [X]

<Voyd> What about Battlefield1943? and 44?
<zen> 42 just came out, give them time to sequalize
<Toen> 1943 and 1944 were peaceful years, you see.
<Voyd> Oh.
<Toen> except for the war.
<Voyd> Darned lying histroy books.
<aen{afk> Ahaha
<aen{afk> "Life was peaceful and all, yep... 'cept for the war part."
<Toen> well christ, if you're going to count a little massive invasion of europe here and a little rampant genocide there...

#33712 +(242)- [X]

<Slasher> Remember that some of us have a social life...
<Crusher> Social life? Where can I download that?

#33714 +(388)- [X]

<JacksonC> remember, VCR's used to expensive :P
<Steempy> Everything used to be expensive
<Steempy> Except when you were a boy
<Steempy> Then everything was a quarter
<Steempy> Gallon of gas? quarter
<Steempy> Dinner? quarter
<Steempy> Blowjob from your cousin? quarter
<JacksonC> haha
...
<Steempy> Well, that's what I paid
<Steempy> Maybe you got family rates

#33718 +(1027)- [X]

<carone> :)
*** DerianX pokes carone in the eye.
<carone> .)
<DerianX> lol
*** DerianX wipes that smile off carone's face.
<carone> .
*** DerianX pokes carone in the other eye.
<carone>
<DerianX> :P

#33720 +(30)- [X]

<@PookaIN> dich un kunt!
<+Thorsen> ok i dont can germaish
<ev-> i don't can norwegian neither you get?
<Thorsen> CAN SOMEBODY EACH ME SOME GERMANY???????
<Thorsen> WHAT MEANS I WONNA FUCK IN GERMANISH

#33724 +(-134)- [X]

<+_flipmode> stop msging me gravy boy
<+_flipmode> you silly turban head from arabia


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