#1091 +(397)- [X]

(tiko-out) Guin is the poster child for pulling out
(Twin-X) although she's the result of not

#1092 +(867)- [X]

<BlackDeth> Now playing: with myself

#1095 +(126)- [X]

<enex> sux!
<LkTruth1> enex reminds me of this: http://www.hoover.com/

#1096 +(1177)- [X]

<aaronx`> anybody got a serial number for nero burning rom?
<maff> J0-0MU5-T-B34W-4R3Z-D0-0D works
<aaronx`> dosent work for me...
<aaronx`> bah
<aaronx`> thats not a freakin serial

#1097 +(1109)- [X]

[D1] You know, I started the slammer routine.
[D1] when everyone was playing for pogs
[D1] I put down my slammer
[D1] and it started a huge trend
[D1] then EVERYONE played for slammers
[Guilty] You put it on the pile?
[D1] yeah
[Guilty] Thats just stupid
[D1] I was a high roller.
(McMoo) are you guys discussing pog tactics?
[D1] yes

#1098 +(410)- [X]

<brad> anyone know where i can find a hitman?
<maff> www.amihitmanornot.com

#1101 +(695)- [X]

[Guilty] Jean-Claude Van Damme made a movie named "Replicant" in 2001?
[Guilty] When did that come out
(McMoo) 2001

#1103 +(340)- [X]

<chrab> aol is for hardcore idlers
*** chrab Quit (Read error: 54)

#1104 +(614)- [X]

<var> 40 ping dont mean shit if it jerks and stops like a fucking epileptic in a strobe light

#1107 +(260)- [X]

* MadHatter is back from: Rebooting!
<^enex^> do you feel refreshed

#1110 +(489)- [X]

<MadHatter> sushi rulez!
<Ash> [12:26] <MadHatter> sushi rulez!
<Ash> [12:31] <MadHatter> i have a tummy ache

#1112 +(109)- [X]

<BlackDeth> gb: ph33r im gonna be seeing spacegirl in a few weeks :P
<LkTrout1> Deth is a boner.
<blazemore> lk has a blackdeth.

#1114 +(334)- [X]

<@Spidey|> http://www.facethejury.com/profile.asp?user_name=coralshay
<@D1> OMG! MOM?

#1116 +(898)- [X]

<var> hrmm
<var> how the fuck did a shortcut to e13ay end up on my desktop
<var> what kinda nefarious shit is windows update pulling
<Guilty> It's your computers way of saying it wants a new owner
<Guilty> Like a dog scratching on the door to get out

#1117 +(432)- [X]

<hypr> WE IS TO CUT OFF ALL SUPPLIES OF VODKA TO YOUR SHITHOUSE COUNTRY

#1119 +(822)- [X]

<iMike> monty python would be funny if nerds hadnt invented an entire subculture devoted to quoting it

#1122 +(438)- [X]

(pervert_) i wear a shirt that says "I'm gay - it's contageous"
(pervert_) not cuz im gay
(pervert_) it's so i don't get jacked
(pervert_) wait....that sounds bad

#1123 +(655)- [X]

<SYch0> maybe in your dreams
<SYch0> and youre pretty pathetic if you dream about me
<SYch0> :o
<MadHatter> you cease to exist as soon as I close irc
<SYch0> hah
<SYch0> which is never :|

#1124 +(1418)- [X]

<DigDug> internet access to productivity is what condoms are to babies.
<Ash> A choking hazard?

#1125 +(217)- [X]

<`Tag> you have a lot of anger from efnet in you
<`Tag> and it shows

#1128 +(627)- [X]

~ iiSII has a bump on the very edge of his eyelid.
(tektrnica) maybe it is a tumour
(letty) or an ingrown toenail

#1133 +(562)- [X]

<homerj> a robot on Futurama
<homerj> "You know why they are using WIndows 3000 as a prison guard?"
<homerj> because it always locks up

#1134 +(579)- [X]

<timmo> remember how i told you guys about that chick
<timmo> i was talking to in the record store
<McMoo> the imaginary one?

#1137 +(582)- [X]

<notgoth> FUCK DAMN IT
<notgoth> i shot cum in my eye
<notgoth> fuck that burns
<notgoth> i was jerking off
<notgoth> and damn!
<notgoth> ow
<enex> were you jerking off to your dick or something?

#1139 +(445)- [X]

<SYch0> heh
* SYch0 has a great family
<SYch0> :D
<Ash> Because they indulge you.
<Ash> But if they keep doing that, you'll grow up fat and arrogant!
<Ash> Oh, wait.... :(

#1141 +(430)- [X]

[D1] wait, vinyl players are called turntables too?

#1142 +(565)- [X]

<BlackDeth> "Disabling this device will cause it to stop functioning. Is this what you want?"
<BlackDeth> hah
<BlackDeth> stupid

#1143 +(729)- [X]

<MadHatter> I did a search for "madhatter efnet" on google and the first thing I see is:
<MadHatter> <MadHatter> I cut my tongue shaving
<MadHatter> that's great

#1145 +(888)- [X]

<aard> blackrose: you're so goth, you shit bats.

#1147 +(736)- [X]

<AirMonk> I'm still looking for a girl that can get aroused by the sound
of a hard drive spinning down

#1149 +(399)- [X]

<Azzy> "Don't touch me there, yer not my father".....

#1151 +(705)- [X]

<Synthrev> Ramen...coke is for pussies
<th0m> no, that's *cock*

#1152 +(521)- [X]

<th0m> i hate clicking on ad banners
<th0m> because i hear a little like clink of a coin going into an
asshole's bank account

#1153 +(848)- [X]

(Mutiny) I'm talking to my mom online and she just said "i could use a good vibrator. i know you dont want to hear that but a woman has needs"

#1155 +(218)- [X]

<|Chris> that geek issues logo looks like you're advertising a soft rock radio station

#1156 +(440)- [X]

<Viscant> hey, i learned a lot from loveline
<Viscant> if a chick has thin white worms coming out of the tang, don't go down there
<Viscant> thanks dr. drew!
<ceddar> thin white worms means everything is a-ok
<ise> ew thin white worms?
<ise> WTF are those
<ruin-> im wondering the sameeeeeee thing...
<ceddar> my policy is if the girl has anything coming out, thin white worms, little black worms, tigers, bears, anything coming out from there, im dropping her off back at her house
<Viscant> oh yeah. and the one about the guy who only wanted to go down on his girl during "that time of the month"
<Dasrik> the one that i wished i could just reach across the phone and bitchslap
<Dasrik> like
<Dasrik> "i just sucked a guy off, and i swallowed. can i get pregnant?"

#1158 +(352)- [X]

<maff> 84 of 127 emails...
<|Chris> god damn
<|Chris> aren't you popular
<maff> spamular

#1159 +(424)- [X]

<DeadPan> i would've challenged knights to fight in a 4 foot body of water
<DeadPan> then just tried to push em over
<DeadPan> and laugh as they drown
<th15> theyd call you a wuss :)
<DeadPan> so i'd be alive and they wouldnt :)

#1168 +(453)- [X]

(snowburnt) teengirl: if you had pre in front of teen i would soooo talk to you

#1169 +(505)- [X]

(konartist) How do you know when you're REALLY ugly?
(konartist) Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed.

#1171 +(359)- [X]

loofaspunge: for(int food = 0; food < worldhunger; food++)
               worldhunger--;

#1175 +(95)- [X]

<Loser> i just got an idea
<Loser> i bet noone's done this before
<Loser> get like 100 guys to come into a bottle
<Loser> and then pay a chick to drink it
<AlmtyBob> Loser: um, that's what bukkake is all about
<ryo-ohki> I have videos to prove it.
<ryo-ohki> We're talking like a fucking clear saucer FULL of spooge
<ryo-ohki> Like, she could pour some cereal on it and still not have enough cereal to finish the jizz off.

#1176 +(349)- [X]

(jayo) heh, apparently when i was 4 my dad took me to the pool, i saw a black guy and said "hey dad.. its michael jackson"

#1177 +(-290)- [X]

<gecko^> shit my firewall is flashing like a niggers eyes on foodstamp day

#1180 +(767)- [X]

<yaragn> ever seen that movie? The Matrix?
<yaragn> with those green lines of flying text?
<yaragn> *THAT'S* Perl

#1181 +(473)- [X]

Sug*******i8: Darn it, I wanted to nuke some pizza but someone's using the micro-wave...
loofaspunge: just rub each slice one at a time really fast...

#1183 +(378)- [X]

(notME) i have a 6 week old kitten
(notME) and my 2 year old cat raped him
(notME) shoved his feline penis in his bum
(notME) i watched it
(notME) i wasn't going to spank him
(notME) d00d no
(notME) i turned around
(notME) and he's balls are smacking my kitten in the ass
(notME) i didn't want to spank him
(notME) cuz it'd only get him off faster

#1186 +(81)- [X]

<chick> sparks makes me heppy :)
<chick> I mean HEMPY :p

#1187 +(177)- [X]

(SpAc3d-) T@$#@R!@##!I!#!#P!#!#
(SpAc3d-) if you were tripping it would show up really clearly :P

#1188 +(544)- [X]

<Guilty> You see
<Guilty> Fat ugly girls shouldnt be allowed to use ":)"
<Guilty> Their sign should be "=)000"