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#13608 +(289)- [X]

<]Darkstar[> Everyone hit ctrl+v
* MMK[TP] hits ctrl+v... ctrl+v runs away
<MMK[TP]> Now I lost these two keys!

#13617 +(249)- [X]

<Ashe> I'm really busty this summer, with School and the trip to Colorado.
<Ashe> busy
* Dingy feels busty this spring

#13618 +(107)- [X]

<spinner2019> i've got an error msg no such file 'file.mp3'
<Mutt-Away> Spinner: That's because the tidal winds in Africa are continental.

#13621 +(227)- [X]

<Mort-Hog> Is 'clenches' spelt right?
<Flirbnic> No, it's 'headphones'.

#13625 +(423)- [X]

<Sumez> there's no way a girl could ever imagine the pain of being hurt in the testicles
<Mort-Hog> emma: The pain oozes up, and your ahems swell up to the size of pomigranits, your voice goes high and squeky, and your eye lids flicker.
<MrCoulomb> I thought that's what happened when you get possesed by mickey mouse...

#13629 +(574)- [X]

<Flirbnic> The American dream is to move to Canada.

#13630 +(255)- [X]

<Robertuybrush> I JUST WANT TO BE A PIRATE
<FortKeeper> To become a pirate, turn off CAPS-LOCK

#13634 +(357)- [X]

<me tarzan> someone please tell me the name of disk 2 in the curse
<Huz> Tarzan: "Disk 2". You should be able to find it in the CD case you got when you bought the game. It's quite distinct, being the only other CD in there other than "Disk 1", which is also clearly labelled.

#13655 +(1258)- [X]

<MrCoulomb> ok, i'm taking out the 3 of spades, and reinsert it into a random point
<MrCoulomb> and i assure you, it is random
<MrCoulomb> I'm now shuffling the cards
<MrCoulomb> and it's a real shuffle too
<MrCoulomb> Now.. I cut the deck.
<MrCoulomb> and there is your card
<MrCoulomb> the 3 of spades
<MrCoulomb> found instantly within a randomly shuffled deck
<Mort-Hog> How did you do that?..

#13664 +(656)- [X]

<Mack_Salmon> do you ever listen to Meat Loaf?
<Flirbnic> No.
<Mack_Salmon> he's food....
<Mack_Salmon> er!
<Mack_Salmon> he's good
<Mack_Salmon> whoops

#13669 +(21)- [X]

[23:24] *** Now talking in #nasa
[23:24] *** Topic is 'we get higher than any of you fools.... ;) | i DO NOT give ops in this chan. end of story.'
[23:24] *** Set by rags on Fri Jul 05 16:21:59
[23:24] *** rags sets mode: +o Deth`

#13670 +(124)- [X]

<Cytoplasm[BLS]> #include <iostream.h>
<Cytoplasm[BLS]> void main(void) { float i = 0; while(true) {cout << i; i+=1; }
<reptile0> umm congrats on your programming accomplishment Cytoplasm[BLS]. John Carmack better watch out!

#13686 +(7)- [X]

<geforce2> get voodoo5 6000

#13687 +(834)- [X]

<Darth-Phenom> But the SNES was only good for its games, much like the PSX
<Pedgey> Well what else you gonna use it for? Making toast?!!?!

#13707 +(311)- [X]

-MemoServ- DALnet would like to recommend that you exercise some standard password security precautions and regularly change your password(s). Please remember that it is your responsibility to remember your password(s).
<Huz> Hey, is that news post DALnet code for "We got hax0red and someone saw everyone's passwords"? :)

#13711 +(31)- [X]

<theSonarch> is there a command for turning a number into a string representation of a number?
<Aximili> yes
<Aximili> /msg Aximili (yournickservpassword)

#13720 +(286)- [X]

<Flirbnic> 26% of final doom has been... bought.

#13723 +(-1)- [X]

<ChrisD[TK]> Sumez = Super fag0t Fighter 2 turbo champion black belt edition

#13724 +(1)- [X]

<djmax> temptress, But then I started seeing that the left was more interested in handing out fish to the poor, than teaching them how to catch fish themselves.
<Temptress> djmax: You are moron #1

#13725 +(79)- [X]

<_emma_> I'm just like a Barbie doll, I come with all the accesories <Mort-Hog> And you have your underwear melted on to you? :)
<_emma_> Barbies in my day had no underwear
<Mort-Hog> What? My barbies all have their plastic underwear molded on to their bodies

#13726 +(158)- [X]

<Sumez> I must admit having two functional penises must have it advantages
<Darth-Phenom> You could fuck a woman and piss at the same time?
<Yolkhead> Would you really want to pee while having sex?
<Sumez> You miss to see the opportunities

#13727 +(185)- [X]

<Kimmo> I don´t know you
<Kimmo> Are you good at something?
<Otto[NS]> Yes
<Kimmo> What?
<Otto[NS]> Dames
<Otto[NS]> *Games

#13728 +(198)- [X]

<Darth-Phenom> So Sumez...how was Nadine?
<Sumez> Nice
<Sumez> She liked big cocks
<Sumez> And she did oral
<Yolkhead> Luckily you are a big cock then.

#13729 +(123)- [X]

<Sumez> Echythus is just a weak wizard. He doesn't want to retake the world.
<Sumez> He doesn't even have the power to enslave all humans.
<Twilo> Hitler didn't have magice powers but he took Poland.

#13730 +(234)- [X]

<ShadowCaster> since nobody is doing anything... lets see who can be the FIRST to type the alphabet backwards with their eyes

#13731 +(273)- [X]

<Otto[half-a-always]> I made AI smarter than George W. Bush with 47 events

#13732 +(208)- [X]

<[-FeC-]sKratch> PENISES
<[-FeC-]sKratch> random penis, sorry
<Kwyjimbo> i understand
<Kwyjimbo> i once did that while giving a speech in class...
<Kwyjimbo> i never did do to good in that class after that

#13734 +(470)- [X]

<Sumez> Adam could just sacrifice another rib for another woman. :P
<Nobuyuki`> sumez: yeah, and two more ribs and he wouldn't need any more women

#13735 +(439)- [X]

<Adam> C'mon, make me one more!
<God> You're out of ribs
<Adam> Here, take my spleen then!

#13739 +(26)- [X]

<Sumez> Did you fight Ozma?
<Darth-Phenom> Maybe...who's Ozma?
<Sumez> The bad-ass optional big boss
<Darth-Phenom> Where is he?
<Gaffa> Right behind you!

#13745 +(196)- [X]

<Bone Man> anyone know how to setup a streming thingie for a webcam
<RonWeasley> www.surveyorcorp.com get webcam32 and go crazy
<InsomniFox> bone- have you got a bible handy?
<Mort-Hog> Yes. The Bible tells you how to set up your webcam.

#13746 +(319)- [X]

<Blondebeard> Sumez: Why are you always confusing me with Blood? :)
<Sumez> Blondebeard: Nick completer
<Ben Whatsisname> Blondebeard486 It's called typing "blo" and hitting [tab]
<Ben Whatsisname> Sumez just isn't watching who he's "blo"ing. :)

#13753 +(1553)- [X]

<Flirbnic> I have a time machine.
<Twilo> That's your fridge
<Flirbnic> Then explain how I can put perishable food items in there and take them out several days later STILL FRESH?

#13813 +(1535)- [X]

<Leo-chan> I have a large warehouse full of large weapons of mass destruction
<webrunner> Destroying mass is against the laws of thermodynamics!
<Leo-chan> screw the laws of thermodynamics!
* Leo-chan pulls out a perpetual motion machine
* webrunner stops the machine
* webrunner holds out a "Thermodynamics Police" badge

#13821 +(435)- [X]

<Jonathan> Hey you know what's hard? Trying to move your toes individually!
<Jonathan> I've been practicing though. My left foot's toes are almost completely independent.
<Sumez> gee, Jon, what awaste of time
<Sumez> At least spend your time pulling your penis so it gets longer or something else that's useful
<Jonathan> I have people who do that for me.

#13841 +(568)- [X]

<yrlnry> When was 'O Canada' introduced?  Must have been
        pretty recently---maybe in the 1960's?

        <ignatz> "A Canada" through "N Canada" were failures. Then
        MacKenzie MacKenzie, a defrocked Mountie from Lard Heights,
        Alberta, had a flash of inspiration one day while drinking
        maple syrup.
        <ignatz> The rest is history.

#13850 +(164)- [X]

<LeanaAnne> Oooh, I guess lacrosse builds up the ol' ass muscles ^___^
<Seiya> Ha, so does being gay. :x

#13851 +(399)- [X]

<Shounen> The expression "smooth as a baby's bottom" is socially acceptable.
<Shounen> But saying something is "tight as a baby's bottom" gets you all kind of weird looks.
<ssai> you shoulda seen the looks i got when i said i had a breast feeding fetish

#13853 +(26)- [X]

<ken-ichijouji> This IQ test has too many questions, and one third of it is repeats.
<Sushimon> ken ... the longer you go the lower your score gets
<Sushimon> it's just repeating the same ones
<ken-ichijouji> Figures.
<bliP> i took that 1 b4

#13857 +(323)- [X]

<colins> Anyone got $50 to lend me, I'm thinking of taking over WorldCom
<fallous> not anymore.  I just bought xerox for $27.95
<colins> you got ripped
<fallous> it included a new toner cartridge for my photocopier

#13868 +(43)- [X]

<bpb> let's all play a game shall we?
<bpb> ok, everybody who has a line that is probably tapped raise your hand
* bpb raises his hand
<bpb> now, raise your hand if you think iip is completely secure ;)

#13872 +(161)- [X]

TX Luder : dude, i made "still fly" my ringtone, i am now officially the coolest person
BeHeMoTh101 : reality check
BeHeMoTh101 : what color are you

#13874 +(240)- [X]

<Nall> ...you know what's funny? I was expecting to hit my rock bottom a few minutes ago
<Nall> And yet... here I am, talking about scribbling vaginas on my chest in order to spooge on myself

#13876 +(1991)- [X]

<@Beramode> nall?
<+Nall> Huh?
<@Beramode> are you outside my apartment?
<@Beramode> it sounds like someone's raping a duck out there, but i don't wanna look, so i had to ask.
<+Nall> ...Are you room 7F?
<@Beramode> maybe..
<@Beramode> are you raping a duck?
<+Nall> maybe..

#13883 +(301)- [X]

<Nall> I'm so confused everytime I come in here. Either stop changing your names, or like, start cybering with me, so I fucking remember you.

#13887 +(229)- [X]

<BlackNovember> Yesterday when I woke up I found my missing Borknagar CD under my pillow.
<WinterDemon> Yeah, that's the "Cum residue on your hand fairy"s way of repaying you for the left over man juice on your hand after you finished beating off and passed out with your hand under the pillow.
<BlackNovember> Whoa, so if i jerk off tonight and put my hand under my pillow, I'll wake up with a Rotting Christ album under it?
<WinterDemon> Yes, but not the album with a bonus disc, that would be too greedy

#13894 +(28)- [X]

<sat985> u know how to overlock the chip defcon?
<Bouyo> Put your processor into mineral oil and you can overclock a 300 Mhz to 1.5 Ghz ( This has been done )

#13900 +(280)- [X]

<Elfhelm> ya can never have to much coffee.
<Elfhelm> the stuff is great for the soul
<Spriggan|UT> just like heroin .... i mean church

#13916 +(337)- [X]

*** tate|work is now known as tate
<chaoticset_Perling> Hey tate
<tate> yo, chaotic
<tate> I just did two of the dumbest things possible
<chaoticset_Perling> ...first?
<tate> the first was staying up all night as part of a plan to attempt to reset my internal clock
<chaoticset_Perling> ...and the second?
<tate> the second was laying down in bed two hours before work thinking I could catch just one hour of sleep
<chaoticset_Perling> LOL!

#13921 +(81)- [X]

<kineticupid> asian + mullet = cant get better

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